But if, on the other hand, the wife is already in Subud and her husband isn't, he cannot be opened right away. Since he is the man, he must first become a candidate. The truth is that the man has authority. So if the man were to follow his wife - meaning that he could automatically become a member on her account - it would debase his status as a man and would be out of place. For a man is responsible for himself, it isn't his wife who is responsible for him.

Bapak will illustrate this. If a man called Henry marries a woman called Mary, for example, then it is not Henry who becomes Mr. Mary, but Mary who becomes Mrs. Henry. And she is called Mrs. Henry, not Mrs. Mary. What this shows clearly is not that the man has more authority, but that spiritually he occupies the first place, meaning that he is responsible for the life of his family.

Bapak also needs to explain that a wife who wishes to come to Subud should first obtain her husband's consent. This is really necessary. We have seen from past experience that if a woman is opened without the consent of her husband, and she begins to receive a lot in the latihan, eventually she will grow away from her husband and her affection for him will diminish. When he notices that the Subud latihan seems to be causing a split between them, he will try to prevent her continuing with the latihan. Since it is the normal thing for a wife to submit to her husband, he may succeed in this. This means that she will find herself obliged to submit to the desires, self-will and thoughts of her husband rather than to her own sincere worship of Almighty God. This results in an uncomfortable situation in the family, inasmuch as the wife may be faced with two alternatives: either to follow her husband's wishes or to persist in her worship of God. Which one should she choose? Bapak prefers to avoid problems of this kind, and his advice therefore, is that the wife should obtain the freely given and trusting consent of her husband before receiving the contact and following the latihan.

It is true that the inner state of a wife who follows the latihan will gradually come to influence the inner feeling of her husband, so eventually he too may come to Subud. But one cannot tell how long this will take, and it is quite likely that before this point is reached trouble may arise in the family. That is why the best thing is for the wife to obtain the freely given and trusting consent of her husband before she starts the latihan.

London, England - August 22, 1959
Code number of Recording: 59 LON 5
Please do not misunderstand these explanations that Bapak is giving and take them as a teaching. They really are explanations, given because all of you certainly need explanations about this spiritual way, in order that your thinking mind and desires may become pliable.

As Bapak has said before, in the life of any being it is the soul that is the main factor or the leader. So if the soul is wrong, that is to say, if the soul that occupies a being does not correspond to its visible form, then the behavior of the being will always be wrong.

Before the visible form begins to take shape, the soul is present as the future content of the being that will form around it. So, it is with the soul already present within it that the outward form begins to develop and finally comes to its completion - as the visible form in which the soul is present.

Bapak will illustrate how this happens. The way a soul enters a being, and the kind of soul that enters, depend on what happened before the being was created and on how it was created. This - Bapak says frankly - has to do with the union between a man and a woman. In most cases, the union between a man and a woman is motivated by an energy that is an accumulation of the atmosphere they have experienced in this world. This becomes a lens within ( what will become ) the visible being, which awakens ( and attracts ) whatever soul has the opportunity to enter it.

For example: human beings are usually unable to put aside their desire to be happier than others, and to be able to provide for their daily lives. This means that, overall, their inner nature, their heart and all of their feelings are directed to the atmosphere of this world; that is, towards matter. When this is the case, a way or opening is created that makes it possible for the material force to enter into the new being.

Furthermore, when a man and woman are not free from emotions that are continually influenced by greed, and have no love and compassion towards others, it is because these are human characteristics awakened by the vegetable forces. If a new human seed arises from the union of a man and wife in whom these qualities are present, then that seed will be a focus for the entry of the vegetable force.

Human beings - men and women alike - are also affected by and contain in their natures the characteristics that render them pitiless towards those who may be at their mercy; that is to say, they will refuse to pardon a defeated enemy, even one who is begging for mercy. They pursue only their own importance, high standing, and victory over others; they avoid contact with anyone who they fear may deprive them of any of their pleasures and satisfactions. If a new human seed comes into being through the union of a husband and a wife with these characteristics present in them, that seed will become a focal point for the entry of forces of the animal level.

Moreover, the new seed can become a target for the entry of the force of the ordinary human level when the husband and the wife have characters that are self-important, believing that their powers are the result of their own superiority. Such people do not feel and recognize that they exist in this world because God has created them. In reality such people only worship themselves and not God's greatness.

These four life forces that Bapak has just spoken about constantly interact with the human inner feeling, because they work in parallel with the main human functions: the thinking, the heart, the desires and the feelings. It is these four functions in human beings that provide the target or form through which the four life forces can enter.

Exeter, England - September 5, 1959
Code Number : 59 EXT 2
Let Bapak take the example of a man and a woman, even if they are a married couple. Say the man is still filled with an animal force – a dog’s, for instance – and the wife has a goat within her. When they do the latihan together there may be quite a commotion in the room, due to this difference; after all, what can one expect if a goat and a dog, each with its own character, worship God together in one room, exposing everything there is within them? Therefore Bapak keeps them separate; eventually, when they are purified and they are both clean – when the wife, formerly filled with a goat animal force and the man, formerly filled with a dog animal force, have both become human beings – only then can they do latihan together, because now it is one human being with another.

It is already something, if the man has the content of a dog and the woman that of a goat. But there are many people who have souls filled with a satanic force; if they do latihan together their feeling of unity will certainly be affected, because each one will be frightened of the other. Bapak has not experienced this himself, but he has seen it. There was a married couple that wanted very much to do latihan together. Bapak let them do it: ‘Yes, try doing the latihan together…’ But Bapak stayed with them and watched while they were doing latihan. After a while, in the middle of the latihan, the wife ran away.

‘Why did you run away?’ Bapak asked.

‘There was a big giant, with a large head, thin legs, huge eyes, a large mouth, and a long neck. I was very frightened. Who was that?’

‘That was your husband!’

After this the wife, who had been very much in love with her husband, felt disillusioned. ‘Don’t be disappointed,’ Bapak said to her. ‘You must love him just the same as before – his faults can be put right by the power of God.’

These are the realities we meet on the spiritual way, but when they occur we must face and accept them, so that we may receive what we need to become good, to become perfect, and to be no longer filled with low forces that block our way to God. You can obtain further explanations by reading Bapak’s book, which illustrates how the low forces work within human beings.

Birmingham, England - September 27, 1959
Code Number: 59 BHX 2
if a woman asks to be opened but her husband is not in Subud, the woman must bring a letter from her husband giving his permission. In other words, don’t open a woman without the consent of her man. This is necessary, or Bapak advises this, because of many disappointing things that have happened. For instance, a husband who hadn’t given his wife permission to join Subud found out that she had been doing the latihan, and said to his wife, ‘What is more important to you, to continue with the Subud latihan, or to stay with me?’ We have to be careful about things like this, to avoid experiencing something undesirable.

And why doesn’t the reverse apply? For example, if a man joins Subud, and his wife does not, permission is not necessary. And also, why is it that even when his wife is already a member, a man still has to wait three months [to join]? It is because the man, by nature, is the authority in family life, so that everything rests with him, the man of the family.

Paris, France - November 7, 1959
Code number of Recording: 59 PAR 2
It has been told in the stories of the prophets and other people in antiquity, that when a priest dies, for him, heaven or hell are in the hermitage, temple, or church. When a knight dies, his heaven or hell are on the battlefield. And for you, who spend much time out shopping, heaven or hell will be in the shops. [Bapak chuckles.] And for those at home quarrelling with their husband or wife: if you meet your death at that moment, your heaven or hell will be in your quarrel. So in any human activity, if a person can truly worship God by God’s will, that activity will be filled with God’s power. And this tallies with a saying of Jesus, that if you truly love God, God is always with you.

Paris, France - November 11, 1959
Code number of Recording: 59 PAR 3
Is it really true that a person’s mind, heart and desires cannot follow his or her human soul when it returns to its own world? Bapak will explain. Let alone facing death, even when you just sleep – as you can easily verify – the mind, heart and desires lose their power. When you sleep, their position is simply altered: from place A they shift to place B – they do not disappear. And yet, as you can testify, the power of one’s mind, heart and desires is unable to operate.

Bapak will illustrate. When you go to bed, before you go to sleep, those of you who are married will of course look and say, ‘Here is my wife, sleeping’. The woman likewise: ‘Here is my husband, sleeping’. And before she sleeps she will feel love and affection towards her husband, there beside her. But suppose that once they are asleep one of them is removed, the other wouldn’t know. So it really is true that the mind, heart and desires cannot know the truth, because their nature is simply to be the tools and servants of a perfect human soul.

Even more so when you face death, your mind, heart and desires weaken and lose their force. As death draws near, when death is at the threshold, your mind, heart and desires – of which you have been so proud, of which you thought so highly, as if they were rulers within you – vanish. And because your inner feeling or your inner self is not yet alive, you will find yourself in darkness.

Wolfsburg, Germany - November 29, 1959
Code Number : 59 WOB 2
This inner state, which constitutes a defect within a human being, starts from the moment of union of a man and a woman, the union of husband and wife. It is due to the fact that, up to the time of their union, their character – meaning their behaviour – is not good. They do not like to help other people, they really enjoy blaming other people, depriving others of happiness; furthermore, they enjoy hurting and harming other people, never remembering the greatness of God or worshipping God. They also give importance only to their own self-interest, and pursue only the wishes of their own hearts.

As a result of the union of this man and this woman, a seed of a human being is created within the body of the wife. She will eventually bring to birth a child whose behaviour is like that of her husband and herself before their union. For the union of husband and wife resembles something like a lens – a focal point, a vessel or a target, which is in accordance with that which created it. For instance if, as Bapak just said, their behaviour is very bad, a lens is created that can only embrace or become a channel for a life force that is low, rather than one that is excellent. That is the reason why there are quite a lot of people who have a character that is really inhuman – meaning extremely bad – who enjoy causing the death of or actually killing people, who enjoy hurting other people, who enjoy harming the order and happiness of the life of others. There are many such people among human beings on this earth, and this is the result of nothing other than mistakes that have been made from not knowing the truth; for example, from the unawareness of parents in their sexual intercourse.

Wolfsburg, Germany - November 30, 1959
Code Number : 59 WOB 3
This will also happen with respect to other parts of your body, including a certain part that is the number one or most important part. For your most important organ, your most private organ, has the function not of an assistant but of a representative of God in creating a new, small, human being; meaning, having a baby. Ladies and gentlemen, you will certainly be able to distinguish and be aware of that difference. ‘Am I uniting with my wife under the influence of the material force, the vegetable force, the animal force or the physical human force?’ Or is it from a force higher than you are, from a noble will that will enable you to have a child with a perfect human soul?

Munich, Germany - December 6, 1959
Code number of Recording: 59 MUC 1
From this experience we also learn that God educates and teaches us. God guides human beings, including all of you, from what is low to what is higher, and from the outside inwards. This also means that we begin to learn about life and about the greatness of God, starting with the world and finishing with the hereafter. You will get acquainted with God’s power while you are dancing, while watching a movie, while bathing in the sea, while flying in a plane, while cycling, while driving a car, while travelling by train, while you are sleeping at night – and while you are having union, a man with his wife, and a wife with her husband.

Vienna, Austria - December 8, 1959
Code number of Recording: 59 VIE 1
The faults that are in us – that is, the faults in our soul – have been caused by ourselves; for example, through the sexual union of man and woman. Usually this takes place because they want each other – from a mutual wish – or just out of habit. Generally it is not known, nor understood, that the sexual union of husband and wife is, as it were, a delegation of power from God so that a child, a human offspring, might be created. So if, for instance, before their sexual union a man has a quarrelsome character and likes to harm other people, to accuse others while boasting himself, or likes to eat while others go hungry, then, from this union there will be created in the new human seed a focus – if one may call it that – a place where material or other low forces can enter into its being. Afterwards this seed develops and becomes a child, and although this child may be clever and eventually may become, say, a good person and do good work, yet their soul will be of a low level, because they were created wrong by their parents.

Certainly, you do not imagine that your sexual union with your wife or your husband is simply being manipulated by the low forces. You certainly do not suspect this. How could you know it, since it is they who are in charge within you? That is why this latihan of Subud is such a priceless gift from God. God will clear away everything that is not right in the human self. For why should a human being not contain a human soul?

So it is truly God’s love for you that enables you to become aware of this and makes it possible to receive the working of God within each one of you, so that these faults are not just passed on and on, and the situation does not become irreparable. Let it stop with you. Then, later, it can be said of your children that they start as human beings of high quality, because all faults have been cleansed during the time of their parents.

From such experiences you will finally be able to accept that the working of God’s power within you is not limited to the soul but reaches outward, into the details, into what is coarse and into the smallest parts. It reaches into your walking, your working, your seeing, hearing and smelling, your speaking and so forth. All of it will be pervaded constantly by the force of God’s power. So not only will your mind and brain know the power of God, but also your hair and fingers and every organ of yours will know that the power of God is constantly guiding us, that God’s power is always behind us and always with us. So we cannot deny that God exists. God is eternal. God guides and looks after us, and is a shepherd of humanity and all God’s creatures. This is in accordance with what has been said by the prophets, and by Jesus himself: that God is forever with you, that God is your constant companion.

Munich, Germany - December 13, 1959
Code number of Recording: 59 MUC 2
Moreover, we need to remember that our coarse body is only of recent origin or existence; meaning, that it is only the covering of our soul. And as for the soul that fills our being: we are unable to know where the soul that rules within us has come from or what kind of soul it is. Just to know the ordinary behaviour and habits of human beings is already very tiring for our thinking mind, and is impossible to understand fully. It is even harder in the realm of the soul, which the mind cannot understand at all. Therefore, unless it is done by God, by God’s power, it is not possible for our faulty soul to be put aside and replaced by a human soul – one that is truly high and appropriate, and that ought to rule within us.

A person’s character determines the imprints that enter him or her from outside; there is created, as it were, a kind of lens within them. Bapak would like to give the following example about A and B: A is a man and B is a woman. A has a very bad character; in other words, he always likes to quarrel, likes to hit other people and has no feeling of compassion towards others; he also likes to blame others. Such behaviour creates a lens in his inner feeling that is very bad. When the man unites with his wife, a human seed is created; a new human being, who will be born from this union. This new human being is like a canvas or a vessel that can only allow a low life force to come in. A higher life force cannot enter because the lens within the inner feeling is too narrow.

Let us take the simplest example, not speaking of the soul but only of the character and the heart. There is a husband and wife: the wife is just one or two months pregnant, and one of them hates somebody. The child that is born will resemble the character of that hated person, either almost entirely or at the very least fifty percent. Therefore, Bapak hopes that you – especially those of you who are still young – will never have a feeling of hatred towards anyone during such a time.

On the other hand, if you are proud of somebody or you like them or love them, this will not have very much influence. A child born in these circumstances will at most possess ten percent of the qualities of this person you love. This is because, between the power of liking and the power of hatred, the stronger one is hatred. For the effect of hatred is like putting something in the fire; it is truly baked because of this fire – the fire of passion; whereas when you like someone it does not come from the passions, so its effect is less powerful.

Adelaide, Australia - March 5, 1963
Code Number : 63 ADL 2
As for the kinds of passion that reside in your heart and mind, they are lawama [Arab.], ammara [Arab.], supiah and mutma’inna [Arab.]. In simple language, you can take it to mean that the passion [ammara] that always resides in your heart and mind is the desire to be right, to win, to be the cleverest, to live just for yourself; the desire, in short, of wanting to surpass others and also to eliminate or diminish the power of others. This being so, when you are influenced by this passion you want – not because you enjoy it, but because the desire comes whether you want it or not – to quarrel, to fight, to be alone or to be separate from other people; sometimes also to be separate from your own family or from your wife or your husband. For indeed these desires – in short, of selfishness and greed – are actually the kind of passion that causes human beings to fall to a lower level, and to fall very easily into an abyss of poverty within their inner feeling and their heart.

In addition to that passion, there is another that always influences you and obstructs you from having feelings of patience, entrusting yourselves to God and letting go of everything. That is laww- ama, the passion of laziness. It means that you do not like to move and you do not like to work, but you just like to eat and sleep. Moreover – and well, Bapak says this frankly – you have a very strong desire for sexual intercourse. So if you are affected by that influence you don’t feel like working, but you like to eat and go out and you like to have sexual intercourse, to be close to women.

The third passion is supiah. It can be explained as the passion that wants, that wants all kinds of things. So if it influences your heart, you want this and want that; you want to look at this and you want to look at that. You do not consider the use of what you want, you just want it and would like to acquire it.

The fourth passion is jatmika. The meaning of jatmika is the passion that accepts everything. It means [staying] simple and not wanting strange things. On the contrary, you want to be at peace; you want a life that is peaceful and conscious. You also want to hear kind words that bring peace to one’s heart. You also remember to worship God and are aware that your life in this world must have been given to you – that is, by Almighty God. So this passion is indeed better than the three just mentioned because, although it is a passion, it remembers the truth and remembers the absolute obligation of human beings to worship the One God. However, this fourth passion that is very good for you has very little influence on your inner feeling, because the three passions mentioned earlier always overtake it and get to you first.

Sydney, Australia - March 19, 1963
Code Number : 63 SYD 2
It is certain, brothers and sisters, that God’s guidance and education cannot go smoothly, even though it is God who is educating and guiding you. This means you cannot receive it complete, all at once. The reason for this, as Bapak said just now, is because of the many faults and impurities that have gone deep into your inner feeling, making you unable to implement [the guidance you receive] and unaware in your own inner feeling. Because of this, there is no other way: it is essential for you to have feelings that are patient and truly magnify God. Also, do not be quick to despair or become fed up; because all such feelings are the same: they all arise from low forces that have overwhelmed your inner feeling.

Christchurch, New Zealand - March 23, 1963
Code Number : 63 CHC 2
The influence of the low forces has taken over your inner feeling so that, without knowing or being aware of the cause, sometimes you feel that your life is difficult, or you have endless disagreements. If you are married, sometimes you do not see eye to eye with your husband or wife. And one could say you very rarely experience happiness in your life. Also, in doing your work, you sometimes have no joy in working, or you do not feel happy with it.

Wellington, New Zealand - March 26, 1963
Code Number : 63 WLG 2
Actually it is not intended that the low forces Bapak just mentioned should not accompany you. They need to accompany you. However, at those times when you worship God – in order to meet and get to know your human soul – it is important for these low forces not to interfere. But when you carry out your obligations in life as human beings in this world, who need to seek a livelihood, you very much need the low forces to accompany you. What is important is that you should not be influenced by them. On the contrary, you should be able to command them when you need them.

Many people, however, use them wrongly and misunderstand; so they try to escape from the influence of these low forces while they live in this world, like those people who isolate themselves in lonely places and no longer care about enjoyment or the needs of their everyday life. There are even those who intentionally give up having a wife, if they are men; or a husband, if they are women. Such actions may indeed lessen the pressure, the influence of the low forces, but cannot remove it altogether; they only reduce it. Whereas, in fact, such efforts are not required and are not appropriate for human beings who wish to worship God and find something that is from God.

Auckland, New Zealand - March 29, 1963
Code Number : 63 AKL 2
It is true that people have tried many ways to be able to receive the contact with the greatness of God. Some do it by moving their body intentionally until every part of their being is moved. There are also those who isolate themselves from the busy world, who dwell on the slopes of mountains, by the seashore or in the depths of the jungle. They also reduce – in fact they completely cut out – all pleasures that people usually enjoy. There are also men who decide not to take a wife and women who do not take a husband. These are all ways in which people try to find or receive the contact with the greatness of God.

Mexico City, Mexico - April 13, 1963
Code Number : 63 MEX 3
As you know, the latihan is God’s gift and your receiving. Each of you receives individually from God, from God’s power, what you need for your self; so each of you has a different design, shape, behaviour and way of moving. Bapak therefore hopes you will not find fault with others, and then they find fault with others in their turn; and you will not say that someone is no good and then they say someone else is not the best; each one of you receives what he or she needs. This is the will of God and the way God gives guidance to human beings: that they each receive in the measure of their capacity, so there is no feeling of conflict or jealousy between them. That is how God gives to human beings.

Indeed that is how it is; every person needs a way that is suited to his or her individuality. Of course you can work this out for yourself. You cannot imitate another person completely. You can-not even imitate your own husband, your own wife or your own child completely, let alone someone else; meaning, imitate their body, their laugh, their walk, and their movements. Even less their character – you cannot possibly imitate that. Therefore, for each of you to find the right way you need something that is suited to your own individuality. That is why it is God who gives it to you; no one but God can give that. If it were not through God, you would not receive guidance that could adjust to your individuality.

Rio De Janeiro - June 13, 1963
Code Number : 63 RIO 4
Regarding meditation . . . It is different with us. We surrender to God, so that it is God who does everything. And if it is God who is doing everything – God being Almighty and All-pure – it is certain that we will be brought to the realm or path of purity, not to a path that is wrong.

People who study such things and end up seeing all kinds of visions do become better and better at it, so they can visualise very strange things. But all of that is the skill of the brain and the heart, which are motivated by the low forces that reside within them. So at the end of their time, when these people are facing death, all of that disappears because their thinking mind and brain are no longer working.

Look, this is something you can consider or work out for yourself: when you are asleep the power of your thinking mind and of your heart are gone. That includes the love that comes from the heart. Before you fall asleep you are lying next to your husband or your wife; you are using the same pillow. Before you sleep you say to yourself, ‘Here is my wife beside me.’ But if, when you have fallen asleep, she is taken away and a buffalo is put in her place, you are not aware of it. And that is only in a state of sleep. So even in sleep human beings lose the power of their thinking mind and their heart; how much more then will they lose it later, when they die.

New York, NY USA - June 27, 1963
Code Number : 63 NYC 2
There will also be times later when your heart, thinking and brain will be cleaned. When your heart is being cleaned you sometimes feel distant from things you used to like. For example, you used to like a particular thing very much. Oh, before you went to sleep you would think about it. But there comes a time when your heart has been cleaned, and you put it aside.

Maplewood, NJ USA - June 30, 1963
Code Number : 63 MPW 1
Surrendering to God and letting go – not thinking about this and that, and not wanting anything – allows the process of the latihan within you to go smoothly. And this will of itself influence the atmosphere that surrounds you; meaning that it will influence your life. If a husband is doing the latihan, it will influence his wife, influence his children, influence his relatives. This influence gets wider and wider, so it can influence anyone, even your enemies if you have any. Say A is your enemy, a real enemy. As your soul and your inner feeling develop more and more, the heart of this enemy changes, through the influence of the progress of your soul. Then you no longer have enemies, only family. That is why Jesus Christ said, ‘Be close to your enemy, closer than you are to your own family.’

That is the answer Bapak has for those of you who ask, ‘How is it, Bapak, that I have been in Subud for three years, but my husband has not joined yet? In fact he is drinking more. How can I influence him so that he stops drinking and joins Subud?’

There are also men who ask Bapak, ‘How is it, Bapak, that I have been in Subud for two or three years, but my wife has not joined yet? In fact she always criticises me. What should I do?’

Bapak always replies, ‘The best and only way for you to restrain your husband from drinking and to make him remember God and join Subud, or to stop your wife always criticising you, is simply for you to worship God through the latihan and surrender everything to God. Because through your surrender, God will work in your being, and through the growth of your soul and the development of your feeling, your latihan will, of itself, influence your husband or your wife, whom you were asking about.’

New York, NY USA - July 4, 1963
Code Number : 63 NYC 5
If you have the desire to go to the billiard parlour, then you will go every night. If, on top of that, you get a taste for drinking alcohol while you are there, then you will drink every night. That is how it is. Thus it can very often happen that the mind and the heart damage you. So that is the reason why they need to be stopped, because – as Bapak told you the day before yesterday – the mind and the heart are the home of the desires, and the desires are easily manipulated by the low forces. That is the point; that is why it is very important for you not to use the mind and the heart when you do latihan, so you can receive what you are supposed to receive.

This also applies to women. Things like cooking and the way you dress are not considered very important, because the way you dress is not going to make you rich, nor will being a good cook bring you big profits; at most it will fill your stomach. But the fact is that if you are led and guided and educated from within, from God’s power, you will become good cooks and will know how to dress well. Yes, you already know how to dress, but that is just copying; you look around, look at others and dress like them. That is why the way you look and the way you dress does not bring you any benefit, which means that it does not suit your individuality. Sometimes it can even look boring; in the sense that people don’t really like how it looks, even though you are wearing it to look fashionable.

In these things too you will be guided and educated once you have received the latihan. Even things like this are important, because if you dress well, guided from within, it does not only affect you and your husband, it also shows that you are able to act in accordance with your feelings. People who see you are not only impressed but also feel glad and satisfied.

This is also a way that leads you forward. Because what people would like to have in this world is a good reputation; they would like to have a good name. Intelligence can be secondary, for you may be intelligent, but if you do not have a good reputation nobody will want your intelligence. But if you are only somewhat intelligent yet have a good name in society, you will always be wanted and trusted. The same will happen if you know how to dress well from within: others will see you and feel satisfied, relieved and refreshed. Consequently, when your friends or other people look at you they will have a feeling of affection and love.

The same goes for cooking. When you are cooking and you follow your guidance from within, you will be able to cook in a way that is appropriate. For example, suppose that your husband wants to eat a particular dish, what you cook will taste better to him than what he can eat anywhere else. This will make a bridge between you and your husband, and will make your inner connection, the connection between your feelings and your souls, closer. And in fact it is this that most women want. And so do most men.

Even though cooking and the way you dress do not seem to be very important, in truth they are very important these days. If you women are good cooks, so that your husbands really feel that your cooking is better than anyone else’s, they will no longer want to eat out. It means that your feelings are alive and can bond with your husband. The result will be that he will come straight home from the office instead of going anywhere else. Once he has finished his work he will be at home. [Laughter.]

But because you have not received anything like that – Bapak doesn’t know whether it is all of you or just some – instead of cooking, you even suggest to your husband that you go and eat in a restaurant together. The result is that in the end there is a separation between you. That is why many people experience a breakdown of their marriage: the wife going to the west while the husband goes to the east, or the wife going south while the husband goes north. So the couple … [gesture]. This is something you yourselves are always complaining about.

The breakdown of a marriage can only be repaired, and the partners be brought together again so that they love each other the way they did in the beginning – before they got married – by truly worshipping God. This is because through your worship you will be trained by God, in things like cooking and dressing. In this way the breakdown that has taken place can be put right.

There is a symbol of this, if Bapak may make the connection, in the story from long ago about the time when Adam and Eve were sent down into this world. Eve was the one who gave the apple to Adam. It was Eve who picked the apple. When Adam had eaten some, he gave it back to Eve. This symbolises that the closeness between the hearts of a man and a woman, or a husband and a wife, is supposed to be the concern of the wife, of the woman. It is something she does; it is her work.

Therefore, in reality, a woman is the heart of the man. So if, for example, there were no women in this world, maybe no man would bother to work. Perhaps they would just live in the jungle. There would be no need to work, because there would be no point.

It is really like that, brothers and sisters. I talked to a man who was not married and asked him, ‘Why is it that you are not working very seriously at the moment?’

‘Why, what is the point of working? I don’t have a wife,’ he said.

‘Really? Is that the only reason why you would want to work?’

‘Yes. But for me the reason would not just be my wife. If I had a wife I would be married, and that would mean that eventually I would have a child. That is the reason why I would work hard all the time, so that I would be able to look after the child I would get from my marriage.’

It is true, brothers and sisters, that marriage has many kinds of outcomes, and these outcomes can cause unhappiness in our life in this world. That is why, even though you may think that things like cooking and making yourself look attractive are not very important, in reality they are most important. Because by doing that, by getting that training, the tension can be dispelled between you and your husband, between any woman and her husband. It will also bring about contented feelings around you; that is, among your relatives, your friends and everyone else around you. So although these things are not so important, later on, once you are able to receive it, you will see that this is in fact what women need to have.

It can even happen that if your husband has a headache while he is at the office, when he gets home and sees you looking attractive – as a result of your inner guidance rather than your heart – his headache will go. Another time he might feel sick in the office. When he gets home you serve him some soup that you made. You have made it for him yourself. Your husband eats the soup and says, ‘How did you make this soup?’

‘Why?’

‘My whole body was aching, in fact I was going to take some medicine. But when I got home and ate your soup, somehow my pains disappeared. Did you put some medicine in this soup?’

‘No; it is like a medicine because I made it with God’s guidance.’ [Laughter.]

This really happens, and it will happen to you. But of course, as yet you have not reached that level. However, the proofs are clear and there are plenty of them, because that is how it really is. God always gives and fulfils what you need in order that you may find harmony in your marriage, between families, and among people in general. Therefore it is essential for you as a human being to obtain the guidance and teaching of Almighty God through your own self – not through the self of someone else. For indeed it is your own self that is the bridge, the way, that you can walk along and follow to reach God and the world of happiness.

Bapak will give another example. When you are cooking, you will of course taste what you are cooking. At that moment you will be able to taste it in the way you did when Bapak tested with you the other night. He tested your laughter: ‘Your mouth can laugh,’ ‘Your mouth can taste,’ and so on. So when you taste your cooking, you will be able to feel, ‘How is my husband’s mouth when he tastes this dish I am tasting? Does he like it or not?’ ‘Ha! He likes it!’

If you do that, later on when your husband eats it: ‘Oh, I’m going to eat all of this. It is so delicious.’

You can do the same thing when you are dressing yourself up. ‘Should I put on make-up or not?’ In the case of lipstick, for instance: ‘If I use this, will my husband like it? Would he like it if I put it on like this or like that? Or shall I only put on a little?’

So in everything you do you always unite your feeling with your husband’s. In that way you will gradually get closer and closer, until you are one. When you have become one, if your husband feels depressed at the office then you will also feel depressed at home. If your husband is happy at the office, you will feel happy at home. If on the way home from the office your husband calls in at the billiard parlour, you will know about that. So you are as one; he cannot lie to you when he goes somewhere. [Laughter.]

That is the breadth of the guidance and direction God gives to human beings, so that they can understand all the details of their lives and can understand about the smallest things and the great ones. So, the latihan you receive is a training that starts with what is small, and eventually goes on to what is great; it starts from what is low, and eventually reaches what is high. This means that it extends to everything.

From this it is clear that, in reality, there is no such thing as a way to God or worship of God by human beings, through what people usually refer to as spiritual knowledge that is fine, spiritual knowledge that is deep or abstruse. Your own individuality is enough.

Once you are able to understand and receive the connection of the feeling between woman and man, between wife and husband, it will with time get wider and wider, to include your family, then your friends, then nations and later all humanity. Then it will broaden further, beyond this world, so that you will be able to feel the life of creatures beyond this world. In this way you will become aware of the vastness, greatness and majesty of Almighty God.

So if you complain that you are not of one heart and one feeling with your husband, or that you do not get on with your family, or that you are unhappy in your life, or that your income is down, or that you are sick or suffering: all of that is simply from your feelings that are still confused and not yet able to unite with your husband, your brothers and sisters, your family and others. And that in turn is the result of your own actions and behaviour. Therefore, in order to restore your happiness, harmony and the closeness of your heart and feeling to that of your husband, to your family and to anyone else, there is no other way but to worship God and do your latihan in a way that is really calm and patient, so that the teaching and guidance of God you receive in the latihan can progress well.

Briarcliff, NY USA - July 9, 1963
Second Subud World Congress
Code Number : 63 BCL 2
I will tell you a little story. There was a Subud brother who was a teacher, the headmaster of a school. Before he joined Subud he was very miserly. He was so mean that, as a result, he owned a large house and a great many clothes. In his miserliness, if, as was his custom, he took a cup of coffee in the morning and someone dropped in to see him, he would give his cup of coffee to the visitor and not drink any himself. Or, when the guest arrived, he would hide the cup of coffee so that he would not be seen to be drinking coffee at that moment. That is how mean he was, even though he was certainly rich.

When he came to Subud I asked, ‘Do you wish to join Subud?’

‘Yes.’

‘Really, with sincerity?’

‘Yes, really.’

‘Do you really wish to worship God?’

‘Yes, I very much wish to worship God. What more do I need, if not the worship of God? For in this world I already have enough. What I lack is the hereafter, because I don’t know the way that leads to God.’

‘Well, all right, but be careful and be sure that you are sincere.’

‘Oh, I really am sincere!’

‘And if you were to lose all your worldly goods, what then?’

‘Oh, I am willing to let them go, provided that my aim to reach God is granted.’

‘Good.’

Bapak opened him and he did latihan, latihan, latihan, until after two months he had a crisis. During his crisis he stood by the roadside with a suitcase full of his wife’s clothes and gave them away. He gave something to every passing person who asked, one after the other, until all his wife’s clothes were gone. His wife protested to Bapak, ‘Is this what happens in Subud, Pak? Since my husband joined Subud he has given all my clothes away. If that is what happens, Subud reduces people to poverty!’

Bapak said, ‘Not at all. This is an example of how God advises human beings to be willing to help others. People should not only accumulate possessions for themselves. To find happiness in their life they must live in concord, live in harmony with those around them.’

That is an example for you, brothers and sisters.

Briarcliff, NY USA - July 15, 1963
Question: Could Bapak please comment on marriage and sexual relationships
Code Number : 63 BCL 6
Bapak: This question requires a rather long answer. Actually it has already been dealt with in the Pewarta Kedjiwaan Subud. Perhaps the questioner only asks this because he does not read the Pewarta diligently. In general, the marriage bond between man and woman is founded on love, on love from heart to heart, not yet from soul to soul. The heart and mind usually like something new. Therefore, often a marriage based on that kind of love can eventually lead to boredom. This happens in marriage when love is from heart to heart.

It is different if a marriage is from soul to soul. However, this can only happen when the man and the woman have been able to receive the contact with God’s greatness, as you have received in Subud. Therefore the Subud latihan not only purifies and repairs all faults in the inner feeling, but also the relationship between man and woman, so that the relationship between a married couple can become no longer a marriage from heart to heart but from soul to soul.

It is for this reason that in Indonesia a married woman is called garwa. Garwa means half of a soul; so, one soul, divided into two or split into two. A married couple is represented as one unit that is split into two, one half in the wife and the other half in the husband. In its true meaning, people who are married are two persons who have become one.

So if someone called Marilyn marries Antonio, before she marries her name is Marilyn. After marriage she will be called Mrs Antonio. One name is used by two people, which means that there is one soul in two people. When that happens the married couple can become one, not only one in heart, but one in their will, in their feeling and in their soul. So then their life is always harmonious; if the husband goes to the west, the wife also goes to the west, if the husband goes east, the wife does the same. It is different in marriage from heart to heart: if the husband goes west, the wife will go east. That happens often enough!

That is how it is. Concerning sexual union between a man and a woman, what Bapak can say is that in fact the first thing you can do is quieten and calm yourselves before intercourse in the way you do when you wish to do the latihan. This is important, so that in your union you are not influenced by the low forces, which can confuse and sully the image in your inner feeling that contributes to the formation of a child. If that happens, the child concerned will always be influenced by these low forces, and he or she will have a character you will not like. It is different if you calm and quieten yourself with patience before intercourse, and as far as possible remember the greatness of God; then if a child is conceived from this union it will be a child with love and compassion for all humankind, possessing a good and fine character.

This is a way that is easy for you to follow. If you had to wait for the way that comes through the guidance and education of God, you would of course have to wait years; because no one knows how long your purification through the latihan will take, as this depends on whether the faults that have penetrated into your inner being are heavy or light, whether they have penetrated deeply or not. Therefore the easy and normal way, which is actually possible for you to follow, is to be calm, peaceful and patient before intercourse.

Do not have intercourse after the two of you have just finished having a quarrel. No. And neither should you have intercourse when you have just had a quarrel with friends or anyone else. If possible, do not think of all kinds of things before intercourse; just be aware of your being, with a feeling of patience, calmness and peace, praising the greatness of Almighty God. This is the only method that is easy and that you can carry out right away, without having to wait for the work of God’s guidance to be completed; because no one can know how long that will take.

Detroit, MI USA - August 1, 1963
Code Number : 63 DTT 1
It is not forbidden to eat meat, to eat this and that, to do this or that. There are not prohibitions like that, and indeed they are not needed. You are allowed to do whatever you are used to doing. You will be able to know the power of each of these different things and different foods that you need for your life, and you will be able to discover their influence on your individuality. So you will be able to examine them for yourself and organise them so that they do not disturb the well-being of your life.

Then you will be able to check your own actions. Going back to the earlier example – you have just made soup. You can examine what you have made. Does the soup you have just made taste more delicious than a normal soup? And also the effect of it – ‘effect’ means its influence: ‘Does it quieten my heart when I have a lot on my mind?’ So, if you make soup, and while you are making it you are not influenced by the food or by the utensils you are using, but everything you do is filled with the essence of your human soul, then what you have made not only tastes delicious but will also heal someone who is feeling sick.

There has been proof of this in Indonesia. A man is sick; he does not feel well. Normally you would give him a powder, or an aspirin, or something like that. His wife cooks, and while she is cooking she never ceases to worship God, as when you are doing latihan. When the food is ready, her husband eats it. When he has finished, he asks his wife, ‘What did you put in your cooking? Did you mix any medicine in it?’

‘No. How can you cook with medicine – it would taste awful!’

‘So how is it that after I ate your cooking just now, my illness disappeared?’

This is the benefit if you are able to cook in a way that does not come from your desires but from the guidance and direction of your soul, like when you are doing the latihan.

We have been talking about women, but this also applies to the men. You men – those of you who work in an office – certainly make use of material objects. When you work in an office you use pens, paper for writing on, and other things. In short you have to use all sorts of material things. If you can really receive God’s guidance when you are using those things, they will not influence your feeling. That is because they will be filled with the essence of your human soul.

If you have been able to do that, it can happen that if you write a letter at the same time as someone else writes a similar letter – where this other person is not in Subud and doesn’t do latihan – and you both write and the purpose of both the letters is the same, when your boss reads them, what you have written really touches him. Suppose that your letter reads: ‘Sir, the truth is that I am always praying, because I have a large family and my salary is small. Would you have pity on me and increase my salary?’

So, suppose there are two letters, one written by someone who has received the latihan, and the other by someone who hasn’t. The one who gets the pay rise is the one who does latihan. That is if you are really guided. But if you are guided by your heart, then, on the contrary, your boss will get angry with you. This is also something Bapak has experienced.

Los Angeles, CA USA - August 16, 1963
Code Number : 63 LAX 2
There is indeed a great difference between former times and now. In the past, in Abraham’s time, in the times of the prophets, human beings were not yet greatly tempted in their life by their desires; so without being directly led and guided by God they were able to worship with real surrender. But now it is very different. The difference is huge. Human beings today are really influenced and manipulated by their desires, heart and thinking mind, with the result that they cannot possibly act in the way people could in the time of Abraham and the prophets. That is why the grace of God, a contact of life, a vibration of life felt in our being that normally is not easy to find, has been sent down now and given to human beings; that is, to all of you.

And you can get it easily. Isn’t that true? For example, this afternoon you have just had a quarrel with your wife or with your husband. Or you have just been to see a movie, an opera or whatever. But the moment you are in the latihan, you are able to receive the contact. That is how easy it is.

Why is that? It is because God is guiding you. God has given you God’s grace so that it is easy for you to act like the human beings in times past. But people’s response – and your response – is, ‘Is this truly the same as what the prophets used to do?’

Well, you will not know that until it is revealed to you by God. Once you are able to receive it you will say, ‘Yes, indeed, this is the right way’. This is because the latihan you have received is beyond your thinking and desires.

San Francisco, CA USA - September 9, 1963
Code Number : 63 SFO 2
This is the process of the latihan, the process of purification and development within your being. It is really a difficult journey for you. So the Subud latihan is not an easy course of training. It is difficult, really difficult. But we are assisted in this difficulty by the power of God we have received. With that it does not seem so difficult to us. Well, it is still difficult, but we do not feel it.

Bapak has experienced this himself. In what way? I will give you another example. Sometimes I feel very sad. My heart feels sad, sad and anxious. The message behind this feeling is: ‘You are going to die’. That is the message: that I am going to die. Imagine how that feels. You already feel anxious and on top of that you believe that you are going to die. What can you do? Who is not afraid of dying? Bapak himself is afraid to die. You die once and that is it. What can you do? If only you could die two or three times and live again. But death is once and for all; and your children haven’t grown up yet and haven’t started working. Your wife is … Bapak will tell you straight out: your wife is still young – if you are a young woman, it is your husband who is still young – and she hasn’t had enough enjoyment in the world, she says. She hasn’t been anywhere; she hasn’t seen Naples, hasn’t seen Monte Carlo. It is indeed very sad.

But, brothers and sisters, you feel these things only during your time of purification. So you experience such feelings only when you are being purified. And if you really surrender to God – ‘I don’t know, it is up to God, whatever God wants; if God wants me to die then I will die, if not, I won’t; I leave it to God’ – that will in fact help you to return to normal.

So it is clear that through the process of purification and change that God works within you, guiding, leading and educating you, you will become a person whose heart is firm. This fits very closely with what Bapak has described – perhaps not here – as the state and individuality of the prophets or messengers in times long ago.

So when your heart feels downcast or trembles, it is a lesson to teach you, so that when you are in trouble it will not affect you. It is God training you to make you into human beings who are firm, who obey God and surrender to God no matter what happens.

Vancouver, Canada - September 27, 1963
Code Number : 63 YVR 4
In reality there is no one – not a single person – who is so clean that they are no longer guilty of sins and mistakes. This applies to all human beings. It is only God who is not affected by sins or mistakes. So the fact that you feel guilty or feel that you have faults is normal, and indeed is the nature of human life.

That is why all those things that generally disturb the happiness of your life – for example, disharmony between husband and wife, frequent illness in your family, changing your job or having a job that is not satisfying, and always having to face scarcity in your life – can happen to people. It is because every human being has their own fate in life. This fate is not determined by God, but by the mistakes that people have made themselves. So you do not need to complain about things that cause trouble in your life. And especially do not despair or feel that you will not be able to find a way out.

It is best to surrender all of that to God. This does not mean leaving it to God in the way you would leave it to another person; surrendering it to God means not thinking about it any more, but trusting and submitting it all to God. Then the power of God will guide you, will guide your inner feeling, so that the faults you suffer from that are the cause of your bad fate will eventually be cleaned; and, by itself, your fate will change and become better, leading to a good life for you.

Tokyo, Japan - October 22, 1963
Supernatural beings Code Number : 63 TYO 2
So, in the latihan God truly educates us and truly guides us, level by level. We are educated to be able to unite with everything that is on our way towards God. For instance, we human beings are educated and guided to be able, within our individuality, to unite with supernatural beings, and so become supernatural beings ourselves. And then we are educated and led within our individuality to be able to become one with the messengers and the prophets, so that we truly become messengers and prophets ourselves. And so on, until we become one with God.

But do not be in a hurry to become like a supernatural being. You won’t feel like working, you won’t wear any clothes and you will just sit still. Do not be in a hurry to become an angel either. You are not even able to unite with other human beings; you are still far away from that. You are not yet able to unite with your own family. Furthermore, you are not even able to unite with your own husband or your own wife; yet you are thinking about and hoping to unite with angels, supernatural beings and so on.

Therefore let us now start from the bottom level first, from lower down: how can we receive from God the ability to unite with our husband or wife, our children and our nation? From there we can progress to the whole human race; and eventually we can go on up, to what is wider.

Truly, the latihan is full of secrets of life that you have not yet become aware of or received. That is why you very much need to do the latihan diligently and, besides that, to have a feeling of real patience towards God, a conviction that the power of God can overcome everything and that everything is decided by God. In that way you will no longer be doubtful or hesitant in receiving the latihan.

Paris, France - July 11, 1964
Code Number : 64 PAR 2
Indeed, the heart and mind make lots of rules, and we cannot blame people for that. Does God get angry with people because they do that? No. God doesn’t get angry, for indeed it was God who gave human beings the heart and mind. And it is part of God’s justice that human beings are given everything, but that it is also these things that can hurt them. In fact people are hurt by their own wrong actions. So if there is something wrong, it doesn’t come from someone else. No. It comes from your own heart.

For instance, why is it that A’s whole life, from when she was small until she became an adult and grew old, was always unpleasant? She says that she always suffered. Sometimes she had money, sometimes she didn’t. And her neighbours often attacked her, and often her relatives did too. Sometimes she was not on good terms with her husband – or if it is a man, with his wife. This is not something strange. Indeed it is normal for a human being, because human beings are overwhelmed by their own heart; that is, by their own wrong actions. Therefore all this is the result of that person’s own mistakes, which have come back to hurt them.

So, if you don’t want to suffer in your life, if you want your life – comparing it to a person walking – to go like this [Bapak demonstrates], then do what is good, what does not go against your inner content. For instance, when you look, see what you see; do not look with something in your seeing that criticises, something that comes from your heart.

If you experience bitterness in your life, deal with it yourself by behaving well, by acting in the best way possible, in accordance with the education and guidance of God that manifests in your latihan. That is why you are always being told in your latihan: ‘Be good. Do not do this or this or this.’ That is God’s will, so that human beings – so that you – can live in well-being and happiness.

Vienna, Austria - July 31, 1964
Code Number : 64 VIE 3
And due to all the many mistakes within you, one cannot say how long it will take to make you complete, to make your being whole. It depends, well, on how fortunate you are. If, during your period of purification you always remember not to feel the way you used to – disliking people and looking down on them, making yourself important and just indulging yourself, paying no attention to others, and often doing things that cause harm to yourself – if you no longer do those things, then it may well be that the changes you experience will progress quickly and steadily.

And it is all carried out by God, not by you. You can relax. You don’t need to think about it; you don’t need to interfere. Leave it to God, for God is Almighty. Why would you want to join in? You don’t have to get involved.

What you need to do is to live your life in the normal way: go to the market and buy things to cook; go to the shops and get things to wear; prepare a meal when your husband comes home from the office. Make clothes for your children every year, or two or three times a year. And if you need to, take your children to school. And also … well, whatever else there is; in short, the needs of your life in this world. Don’t think about your soul; that is being taken care of.

Planegg, Germany - August 7, 1964
Code Number : 64 PLG 3
So, it is not necessary to ask Bapak about such a situation, or to consider taking the quick decision to divorce. Bapak always advises people to have patience in such a situation, and to surrender it to Almighty God by practising the latihan. This is so that God may show them the right way; so that they do not divorce each other, but rather that the relationship between them will become closer and more harmonious.

Bapak does not blame you for having such wishes, but you should not want to have things right just for yourself, nor to have things pleasant just for yourself; you must of course remember the other person. Yes, if it is the husband who complains to Bapak, it is certain that he will say only good things about himself and blame his wife; and if it is the wife who is complaining, then it is bound to be the husband who is wrong, whereas she says only good things about herself.

Clearly, the human heart wants everything to be pleasant, without any disturbances; wants to come out on top and be the best; it does not want us to look around and notice that there are better, nobler and more genuine people than ourselves. That is the truth about the heart.

Whatever problem comes up in your life, it is simply the result of your own mistakes. Therefore you should have the courage to take responsibility for that and put right whatever you have done wrong. You may, for instance, have thoughts about other people whose life situation is bad, and feel that you want to help them. Yes, such a wish is indeed good, but you do not understand or you have forgotten that the person is like that on account of what they themselves have done. Nothing wrong can happen to a person that they have not themselves created. So it is clear that what caused this person you are thinking about to get into a bad situation is their own mistake or their own wrong action. And so, if you are always thinking about this person who has sinned against his or her own individuality, the reality is that you too will be affected by their mistake. It is as if the person you are helping were involved with the police or the authorities, and you then become an accomplice in the matter.

New Delhi, India - September 14, 1964
Code Number : 64 NDH 1
Once you have progressed in your latihan and your soul has developed, you women will worship God whenever you get dressed, whenever you comb your hair, whenever you make up your face and whenever you go anywhere, and whenever you make love with your husband. It is the same for the men. When you eventually progress in your latihan and receive the development of your soul, you will be able to worship God – to be close to God in the way Bapak just described – through your normal actions: in the office, while you are working, going around, putting on your clothes and all the other things you do. All that will be filled with the whisper of your soul, which can show the right way for you, so that you can lead a good life and be happy while you live in this world.

Solo, Indonesia - October 28, 1966
Code Number : 66 SLO-1
Bapak has explained to you that the purpose of your movements and your various kinds of behaviour in the latihan is to express and make visible the inner qualities of whatever is hitching a ride within you, so that you can see and feel the true situation. So once you are truly able to be alert and attentive at the moment when you are doing something, you will be able to feel: ‘Oh, this is a goat that has joined me as I eat.’

Yes, if it is just eating, it doesn’t matter so much. At most it is a matter of stewed vegetables and rice, which doesn’t cost a lot. But if it is during intercourse between husband and wife, once conception has taken place it cannot be changed. Change would mean death – unless it is with God’s help, as in your case.

That is the danger in human life, but God has given all of you His love and His help. So if you tried to estimate it, what you have received has no price. Not in the sense that nobody wants it, but rather, that there is no material thing whose value can be compared with what God has given to all of you.

Suppose that you are the husband and you are close to your wife, but you have not yet reached the final point we were talking about, you are still just lying next to each other: you will realise, ‘Oh-oh, the person lying here next to my wife is not my real I.’ You will be able to know that.

It is even better if your wife can receive it too: ‘Oh this is not me, is it? I know that,’ she says, ‘I know it is not really me. If I have a child, later it will be a little monster.’

Colombo, Sri Lanka - February 26, 1967
Code Number : 67 CMB 3
Yet why is it that some of you have done latihan for a long time and yet you cannot receive it properly and you do not feel that you have made any progress? The cause is the mistakes and wrong actions of your ancestors. Of course, you do not know what those mistakes are, you are not aware of them; you are unaware that the people you have descended from had bad characters and behaved wrongly, in ways that contravened God’s will for human beings.

Well, you can reflect on this for yourself. You exist because of your parents, and if you have children, they exist because of you. Normally, when a man has sexual intercourse with his wife, a husband unites with his wife, he is completely unaware that his imagination and thoughts run wild: he fantasises about this and that, he thinks about this or that. And that is just your thinking, not yet your actions. If you behave wrongly, for instance if you blame other people or you disturb other people, and after doing so you have intercourse with your wife – or as a wife, you have intercourse with your husband – and a child is born as a result of that union, that child is certain to be full of the effects of your mistakes and wrong actions. The baby will also be full of all kinds of fantasies and imaginings. So, of course, the child that results from that union has a nature that is full of the low forces, that is full of wrong ideas. As a consequence, if later on that child receives the latihan, they will not be able to receive it easily; they first have to be cleaned of all the stains and blemishes in their being.

For this reason, the latihan you receive not only will show you how to worship God in the right way, it will also have an effect on your children – and your own situation. So not only will you be able to get along with your spouse, but your children will become people who are truly of value to society, to their nation, to the world.

And if you are able to receive the cleansing of your inner feeling from Almighty God, and consequently your soul ascends to a higher level, the benefit for you – apart from knowing that you have ascended – is that your father, your parents who gave birth to you, will be taken to a higher level too. In this way you will truly show your love for your parents; you will show your love for the people from whom you are descended.

Colombo, Sri Lanka - March 2, 1967
Code Number : 67 CMB 4
It is true that life is hard for most people. That is because they do not realise that their own heart and mind are their oppressors – the sovereigns that rule their being. Consequently their ears are enslaved, their eyes are enslaved, their nose, their mouth, their hands and feet, their inner feeling, all are enslaved. Every part of their body is affected, oppressed and shackled by the heart and mind, by desires that reside in the heart and mind.

This is why it is said, ‘Who is your enemy? Your enemy is your heart.’

But do not misunderstand this. Although your heart is likened to an enemy, if you are smart about this – meaning that you realise what the problem is and you are guided by God – your heart will no longer be your enemy, it will be your partner for life. This is why the relationship between the heart and the body can be likened to the relationship between a husband and wife. A wife represents the heart, and the body is represented by a man. Or, to put it another way, the heart represents the wife, and the body represents the husband.

So do not think your wife is your enemy [Bapak laughs]; your wife is your partner for life. Your life cannot become good without your wife. Your wife – your heart – is the life-long companion that will prevent your downfall in this world. However, through human beings’ mistakes, the heart can also cause their downfall. This is why – Bapak apologises beforehand to the women present [Bapak laughs] – it is told in stories, in tales from the past, ‘A king’s downfall is his wife, but his nobility depends on his wife too.’

This is the reality of the latihan. You will progress quickly, you will develop quickly and smoothly, you will find it easy to receive what you need, once you are no longer oppressed by your desires, once you are no longer oppressed by your heart.

Colombo, Sri Lanka - March 3, 1967
Code Number : 67 CMB 5
That is why, when a married couple quarrel or fight, the wife sometimes bites the husband. [Laughter.] That shows that, at that moment, her mouth is filled by an animal force, the force of a tiger or a monkey.

This is to give you a little taste, so that you will be more motivated to worship God by doing the latihan. For once you have a human soul, at the very least you will know how to live properly. It will not happen that you cannot find the right way to live your life – because even when it comes to animals, God has decreed how they should live.

Take a caterpillar. Why has God decreed that caterpillars should live near to or on leaves? It is because leaves are their food. Similarly, God decreed that lions and tigers should live in the forest, because the forest is where lions and tigers can find food. Why has God decreed that goats should live, not in the forest but in the open, on plains with lots of grass and small bushes? It is because that is where a goat can lead its life. This even applies to worms. Why has God decreed that worms should live in the soil? Because that is the right place for them, that is where a worm can lead a happy life.

The same goes for people. God has decreed that people should live in this world in groups with other people, in human society; that is the place for them. If that is so, why do people suffer deprivation? Why do people live in despair? Why can’t they find happiness in their lives? It is because they have gone wrong. What is their mistake? Their mistake is that they have not been able to find the instructions that God placed within them. A few days ago, Bapak explained to you that [there are instructions] inscribed in everyone for how they should live, how they should earn a living, so that they can live happily here until the end of their lives.

Take the tiger – people say that the tiger is a wild beast. In fact it is not, that is just the way a tiger is. A tiger is supposed to get food by mauling and biting. The proof is that God has given the tiger claws to maul with, and God has given the tiger sharp teeth to bite with. Similarly, take cattle or cows: people say that the cow is a docile animal. That is true, because a cow’s teeth are flat and are no good for mauling, and neither are its hooves, because they do not have claws that are sharp and pointed like a tiger’s. That is God’s will.

So, it is incorrect to describe a tiger as a wild beast, because that is the nature of a tiger. If a tiger were not fierce, if it did not have claws, if it could not leap and maul, if it could not bite, it would die, because tigers do not eat grass. The same thing applies for cows: if a cow is not in pasture, if it is taken to the forest, it cannot live; it will surely die because it does not have claws like a tiger, it does not have teeth like a tiger.

It is the same for human beings; God has decreed that human beings should be the highest of all creatures. But why are humans at a disadvantage, why are they physically weak? Human beings cannot use their fingernails to maul with; they cannot use their teeth to bite with. Well, sometimes a husband gets bitten [by his wife], but humans cannot really bite – their teeth are too fragile.

However, because God has decreed that human beings should be the highest of all creatures, that is why – even though they lack dangerous external features – human beings have reason and resourcefulness. Of course, you know that reason means human thought, and resourcefulness or budhi is the content of a human being that Bapak describes in susila, budhi and dharma. Budhi is a power, a fantastic power that is present in every human being.

So, human beings have reason and budhi. Reason means their thinking mind, which can be filled or guided at any time by the power of God, with the result that human beings can create things that are far more dangerous than a tiger’s claws or teeth. Therefore, if someone is in despair, if they do not know which way to turn in their life, it is their own fault. Why do they not bring their mind closer to their budhi, to the power of God?

This is why you need the latihan. This is why your latihan starts with movements in your arms and legs and then spreads to the other parts of your body. Ultimately your latihan spreads to your inner feeling, to your inner peace, so that the whole of your inner feeling is filled with budhi, is filled with the power of God that manifests within all of you. This is the power that is your guide, that will lead you, that will show you the way to live in this world and how to live your life in the next world, after you die.

That is how to live your life. But [God’s guidance] also extends to all the details of your life. In the case of women: you will be guided by the latihan in how to put on your make-up, how to cook, how to raise children and how to run your household. God will not neglect to teach you those things. God will guide you in everything.

Do not imagine that God does not guide human beings. Do not imagine that God does not guide women. Eventually, if your latihan has developed and progressed, you will put on your make-up, and cook, in ways that truly please your husband. You will be able to run a house that your husband enjoys, and other people enjoy too. Indeed, those are women’s special responsibilities, their areas of expertise and skill.

Why are some women unable to get along with their husbands? Why do their husbands dislike them? Why do some husbands distrust their wives? The reason is that those women are unable as yet to receive guidance from within, guidance from God. However, with God’s help, the family life of every married couple, of every family, can become harmonious. The family will not just get along on the surface, but inwardly and outwardly.

Often the love between a married couple comes to an end; when they are old there is no love between them any more. Why is that? It is because the wife has not found the inner guidance that is available to her; the wife is not guided by the power of God that is inside her.

You do not realise that the way you cook affects your husband’s inner feeling; the way you put on your make-up affects him too; and the way you look after your children. Once you can receive your own inner guidance, the way you put on your make-up will delight your husband. The same goes for your cooking, it will be your husband’s favourite food. Moreover, once you reach that stage, your cooking will be like a tonic for your husband to keep him healthy.

Bapak has experienced this. On one occasion Bapak was sick and Ibu cooked some food; after eating her food he immediately got better.

These are the secrets hidden in women. Now Bapak is going to explain about the nature of men. He is not going to explain about women and leave the men alone. [Laughter.]

If we consider the human body, a man can be said to be like the inner feeling: he symbolises life. This is because a man – the human being with the male nature – is the one that brings life. Whereas a woman’s nature is like a factory – she raises that seed, even when it is still in the womb. Clearly, man’s nature is life that takes human form.

Because man is life, that means that he is the one that brings about life, so the man’s nature is alive. To be alive means [he is] the one who works, the one who is resourceful. So, if a man does not have a good wife – if she cannot cook, if she cannot do this or that, if she cannot make herself look good – that is not the woman’s fault, the fault lies with the man. If you are the man who is supposed to work and be clever, why are you not able to open the way for your wife? So, do not get married and send your wife out to work while you stay at home [and do nothing]. [Laughter.]

In the past, before there were factories, offices and so on, in a family it was the man’s responsibility to plant – to plant cotton, to plant rice, to plant bananas, papaya, mangos and so on. That was the man’s job. All that was a man’s work – meaning that it was the man who had to bring things to life for the life of his family – whereas the woman wove the cotton, cooked the rice, and so on. That is how it used to be.

So, it is clear that all problems in a family originate with the man. Do not get the idea that being a man is easy. It is the man who has to study, who has to learn, who has to look for this and that to meet his family’s needs. That is the man’s responsibility, not the woman’s.

Nowadays, both the man and the woman work. On the face of it they earn twice as much, but in reality their family life is in chaos. This is the situation.

So, we can take all this as evidence, as a model for us, to show that, in accordance with God’s will, men – all you men here – have the duty and responsibility to receive this contact from God’s power and develop it in the right manner. You must do this, so that once you can receive completely, or at least fairly well, you can show your wife the way. Then, you and your wife will get along not only in this world, you will also get along with her in the next world, after you have died.

Therefore the nature of a woman is that she is the principal and excellent helpmate of the man. In fact she can be described as the other half of his soul. That is why, in Java, a wife is called garwa, which comes from sigaraning nyawa; that is, one soul divided in half: one half is the woman, the other is the man. Therefore you must not consider a wife to be a toy, as if she were a material object that can be manipulated to fulfil the wishes of her husband. That is a great sin.

Such, brothers and sisters, is the use and benefit of the latihan. You are even more fortunate in that your wife receives the latihan too. Actually, she does not need to do it if her husband progresses spiritually. That of itself influences her soul, so that they become one, whether she wishes to or not.

Bapak needs to tell you something else, because not many of you here understand this. This is for the men. Whenever your wife gets pregnant, first of all, do not hate anyone; and, secondly, do not harm any living thing; for example, a goat, a cat, or things like that. If you do those things when your wife is pregnant your actions will cause the baby in the womb to change. In fact, if you hate someone, the unborn child will have the qualities of the person that you hate. That is the problem.

So, as far as you can, rather than wait until your wife is pregnant, it is better if you do not hate other people at all, so that if your wife is pregnant, the unborn child will be given a soul, will have a character, of the finest quality.

This has happened to members, and Bapak has experienced this himself. If you enjoy trapping or shooting birds or animals, never hunt when your wife is pregnant. It will cause the nature of the unborn child to change; the foetus in your wife’s womb, the mother’s womb, will be affected.

To corroborate this to some extent, many of the children born to members after they join Subud, after their parents receive the latihan, have a nature that is very different from the children who were born before they joined. Bapak has witnessed this in Subud members everywhere.

The reason for this is that after you receive the latihan, the desires that constantly oppress you and make you hate other people are, at least to some extent, reduced because of the latihan. That is why children born to you after you join Subud are very different from children that you had before you joined Subud.

Johannesburg, South Africa - March 15, 1967
Code Number : 67 JNB 2
In the latihan, when you receive, you feel as if something is moving inside you, but you cannot tell where those movements start from. That is certain. Why is that? Let us liken you to a table. To make a table you should start with one of the legs; you should start from a certain point. But that is not the case for you in the latihan. In your case the latihan can start from any part of you, from a foot, even from a place that is inappropriate.

Why is that? It is due to the faults that you got from your parents. That is why it is said in religion – Bapak has to refer to religion again – when a husband has sexual relations with his wife, or a wife has sexual relations with her husband, they should never forget their religion, they should never forget to say, ‘Allah ‘la ilaha illa’llah. Muhammad ar-Rasu’llah.’ That is in Islam. And in Christianity, they should never forget to do this. [Bapak makes the sign of the cross.]

They need to do this, so that what happens to the seed that will become a child, that will become a human being, will come from the right source. You should not just follow your own pleasure. That is the reason why when you do the latihan you cannot tell where the latihan starts from.

Johannesburg, South Africa - March 15, 1967
Code Number : 67 JNB 3
There are many people who, in an effort to hear the whisper of their soul – the whisper of their inner being, or the whisper from God – forsake all pleasures and isolate themselves somewhere far from society. Some people even desert their families and their work. They do that on purpose, in an effort to receive the contact from the power of God, because they think that this world is a temptation, a temptation in their lives.

There are even some people who, in addition to doing what Bapak just described, do not want to get married and have a wife – or if they are a woman have a husband – because they think that to get married and have children will be an additional burden, and that they will not be able to achieve what they hope for.

In truth, acting like that goes completely against God’s will. God determines the forms that God’s creatures take in this world, and that includes the human form. God has decreed that human beings should have all the organs that they need to live in this world – eyes, ears, a nose, a mouth, and so on. God decreed that human beings should have these organs so that they would use them. It should not happen that eyes, which are supposed to be used to see with, are not used for seeing. The same applies to the nose, ears and mouth, organs that can be used for eating, talking, feeling, hearing and smelling. Each organ must be used in line with its inner content and for what it was intended.

Human beings have also been given an inner heart and a mind. And they have an organ for intercourse – the sex organ – which is not meant to be left idle or not used as intended. It must be used, because that is God’s will. Therefore human beings who go against their own nature by not using all their organs for their proper purposes go against God’s will.

God is All-knowing, and God created each of you, so God knows that because you have the senses and the life forces that are your companions – the material or satanic forces, the vegetable forces, the animal forces and humankind’s own life forces – God knows that each of your senses, each of your life forces that are your companions, will tempt you and make it inevitable that you forget about God.

But because God knows, and because God is Almighty, in addition to determining your form, your physical body, God has also placed God’s will inside you; it is within the innermost part of you. In Islam, this is called qalb. It is inside the innermost parts of you. That is where God’s will or God’s power manifests, which makes it possible for you, by using this power, to free yourself from or not be too affected and influenced by your senses and the low forces that are your companions for life.

London, England - March 27, 1967
Code Number : 67 LON 2
So it is clear that in reality the latihan does not make people stupid. On the contrary, it clears our brain and cleans our inner feeling that is full of dirt and faults. Therefore in the latihan we are educated and led to become honest and authentic. If it is yes, we say yes; if it is no, no.

For women, once you are pure and have started to be educated by God, you will be taught how to be in your marriage, and how to relate to your husband in a way that will make his heart and mind clean and quiet and will protect him from desires that would create a distance between you. Bapak is saying ‘once you are already pure’: you are of course not pure yet, and if you are not, you cannot receive this education. This education will make your marriage into one that is between your souls, not one between your desires or your hearts.

Manchester, England - April 7, 1967
Code Number : 67 MAN 1

Manchester, England - April 13, 1967
Code Number : 67 MAN 4
This is why what we call ‘culture’ nowadays could be said to be dead: it has no content. In fact, culture is a bridge for humankind. Through culture, when someone masters it, they will find a way to understand and discover the right way to lead their life.

You can start with something small, something simple, which women do. If as a woman you can receive and be aware of the content in your hands, you will be able to prepare and cook food that will make your husband truly content. Food that you prepare, which you cook with your own hands, acts like a thread. The food your husband eats, which you have cooked, forms a thread from your soul to your husband’s soul. Thanks to eating your food the spiritual bond between the two of you, between you and your husband, grows closer, grows firmer, grows stronger, and you grow together.

That was why in the old days – not nowadays, as times have changed – in the old days, a woman had to be a good cook, a woman had to be good at cooking for her husband. And it was the man’s job to go and find the money to obtain the ingredients for his wife to cook.

But now it seems the reverse is true, in some cases the wife goes to work while the husband stays home. [Laughter.] Or they both work, with the result that no one looks after the home and they buy meals from shops or food vendors. As a result, a strong matrimonial bond between husband and wife never develops. That is why nowadays a husband’s affection and love for his wife, and a wife’s love for her husband, are so weak. In fact, the husband is more attracted to the shops; likewise, the attraction between the wife and the shops is stronger than the bond between husband and wife. [Laughter.]

This is one of the causes. Later on once you can receive the latihan well, you will discover for yourself, the value, purpose, benefit and importance of a woman cooking for her husband. This process goes so far that when a woman cooks – provided that she is good at cooking because she can feel the content in her hands, God’s will manifesting in her hands – when her husband eats her cooking it will have a medicinal effect. It can be an effective medicine to cure her husband when he is ill.

And her food is a medicine that cures not only common ailments, but even uncommon ones. If her husband is thinking too much about other things and not about his wife, he will be cured when he eats his wife’s food. That kind of ailment is far more dangerous than influenza or other illnesses.

But hands that are guided by the power of God are not just good at cooking. Take using cosmetics. Clearly you think wearing makeup is very important. The proof is that you go to the trouble to buy lipstick, to buy this and that, and to use all kinds of [cosmetics], none of which are cheap – they are expensive. Therefore it is obvious that you feel and consider it to be important for you to wear makeup. But even when putting on makeup, if you are aware of God’s will that manifests in your hands – which is guidance, instruction and education for you – you can make yourself look stunning to whoever sees you, especially your husband.

And that is not all. God’s education for women that manifests in your hands will enable you to make all kinds of things with your hands, artworks full of life; and anyone who sees what you make will be drawn to it. That is the value of art that is full of life. That is why artefacts that people made in the past, old things, although they are not beautiful, still attract us. That is not the case with things people make now, which look beautiful but do not engage our hearts.

In summary, there is much Bapak still has to tell and explain to you about what will manifest in your hands and enable you to do things to benefit you and your family. But just to explain the uses of your hands would take a long time. So, Bapak will stop talking about hands and will talk about the mouth and other parts of the body.

Take your mouth. Your mouth will not be left alone – every part of your body will be filled by God’s will; no part will be left out. Your mouth will get the same treatment. Once your mouth has been purified and can feel its own content – the will of God in your mouth – you will be startled. You will be taken aback when you hear your voice after it has been cleaned and is guided and directed by Almighty God. You will be enchanted by your own voice; other people will be too, especially your husband. Your voice will not just sound clear and melodious, the sound of your voice will gladden the heart; it will ease a mind that is troubled, worried or stressed. That will benefit your family. For instance, your husband: you can comfort your husband just with your voice, which will sound sweet, fine and full.

Paris, France - April 20, 1967
Code Number : 67 PAR 3
So people ended up marrying from their desires, because of what their hearts wanted. In consequence, marriage ceased to be a way for a person to attain nobility and goodness in life; instead it became a source of constant tribulation in life. That is why marriage scares people who want to find peace of mind, who want to find their true path and find out what life was like before they were born and what it will be like after they die.

For it is true, brothers and sisters, that there is no greater ordeal for a husband than the torment caused by his wife. If a woman is tormented by her husband, because he will not give her what she wants, she feels utter despair. And vice versa, if a husband is tormented by his wife, he feels complete despair too. The saying goes: ‘Your wife is your closest confidant, but she is also your greatest enemy, your number one enemy.’ They even say, ‘Your wife is the enemy under the blanket.’ [Bapak laughs.]

But if you can keep the promises that you made to each other in the church or the mosque: ‘You are married now, you are joined. This is your wife. This is your husband. But both of you must remember that above you there is the One who envelops, protects and gives you life; that is, God. Never forget that God exists and that God is Almighty and that you should worship and bow before God.’ If, like Adam did in the beginning when he married Eve, you can keep and fulfil that promise during your life – while you live in this world and while you raise children – you will be able to find your true path; you will be able to find out about life, the right life for you to lead and follow. And you will also get to find out how you lived and what you knew before you came to this world, before being born.

Thus you are fortunate that the arrival of the latihan is a revision or reminder for humankind, particularly for you, and that you can uncover the secrets of life that have been forgotten, long forgotten.

So it will come as no surprise that you need to be vigilant and cautious. After doing latihan, once you receive the latihan well, the impulse or urge to make love to your wife will be extremely compelling. You may feel like you want to explode. But you might misconstrue that urge and just give in to it and act wrongly. In fact, that urge is an awakening of your inner feeling – the pure feeling, the holy feeling – to help you find your true path, the right way for you to take in life, the path that you should follow.

Through acting wrongly without understanding, without realising its impact, union or intercourse between a man and a woman is an easy way to degenerate to a subhuman level. Conversely, if you keep your promise – in other words, if you discover the secret of union, the secret of marriage – you will be elevated to a higher level and you can return as a complete human being, as Bapak explained, to the status or life Adam lived in the past.

So, this spiritual training that we call Susila Budhi Dharma or Subud is actually a retraining to practise the right way to live. Subud is not a new spiritual knowledge or a teaching, a set of guidelines or a course of instruction. It is simply the way for you to re-experience what it was like before your inner feeling fell under the sway of this world. This is why the Subud symbol is circular. A circle has no end. It symbolises that life has no end. Life exists and is eternal. In the same way, the power of God that envelops all life, precedes all beginnings and succeeds all endings.

The Hague - May 6, 1967
Code Number : 67 HAG 1
Therefore you, who have received the contact with the greatness of God, are fortunate that God has given you His grace in this time full of obstacles and difficulties, where all sorts of things influence human life and cause you to forget about the will of God that has been incorporated within your being. You are able to appreciate how easy it is for us to receive the latihan, which in reality is guidance, direction and education from Almighty God.

You go to the cinema and afterwards go to the latihan hall, you do latihan and are able to receive. You go to the opera and afterwards go to latihan, and you are able to receive. Some times you have just had a quarrel with your wife or your husband and go to latihan, and still you can receive. God has made it easy for you, brothers and sisters.

Why is that? It is because God knows everything. God under-stands the state of humankind and the state of the world, and that at present it is hard for human beings to quieten their heart and their thinking. Both are in motion and cannot be stopped. That is why you actually do not have to be patient in the latihan and be able to quieten your heart. No, because it is impossible for you to quieten your heart and quieten your thinking. You cannot.

God has given you the grace to be able, suddenly and unexpectedly, to have your heart and thinking quietened. That is the grace of God you have received and experience. Therefore if you do not practise [the latihan] and do not feel grateful to God, it means that you are sinning against your individuality, sinning against your soul. That is how it is.

New York, NY USA - May 18, 1967
Code Number : 67 NYC 3
Recalling what Adam experienced and what happened to Adam when he was with Eve, it is clear that marriage between a man and a woman is really a way for human beings to recall what it was like before they were sent into this world, in other words what it was like before they had physical human organs and after they had them.

However, while what Bapak just told you may seem simple enough, and many of you think that this is a matter of little consequence, in truth, marriage or intercourse between a man and woman is the most important thing in human life – but it is full of peril. The trouble is that through your own faults, through your own carelessness, by neglecting to worship God when you make love to your wife, or when a wife makes love to her husband, a new human being is created – a human embryo – which is full of dirt and sin. And the human embryo you make, your child, will grow up to be a human being who does not live by the rules that God has laid down for them. They will be someone who is driven only by desire, who seeks and wants only material things; they will not worship God and they will not submit and have total faith in the greatness of Almighty God.

New York, NY USA - May 19, 1967
Code Number : 67 NYC 4
. . . At three in the morning Bapak was sleeping and, like this … [Bapak sings a Javanese melody without lyrics]. That was how Bapak sang in his sleep. So of course my mother wanted to know, ‘What’s going on?’ and she came to see me.

The same thing might happen to you when you sleep; you might sing, ‘do, re, mi, fa, sol,’ [Bapak sings; laughter]. It could happen to you. Bapak needs to let you know about this. Do not be surprised or shocked if it happens. It could happen to a wife who has been opened but her husband has not. Or to a husband who is in Subud but his wife is not. Naturally, it would be a shock if one’s spouse did that.

This is why Bapak needs to let you know that from the moment you begin to receive the latihan it will work continuously; it will never stop. It could happen that you are doing clerical work at the office and you pick up a ballpoint pen and write something without intending to: ‘Who is writing this?’ It could happen.

Los Angeles, CA USA - June 4, 1967
Code Number : 67 LAX 2

Los Angeles, CA USA - June 6, 1967
Code Number : 67 LAX 3
Because Adam was the first human being and not yet very much influenced by the world, once Eve was there he remembered how it felt in heaven and what he had experienced there. He felt this and said, ‘O God, now I understand that by creating Eve – another human being like me but of different gender – You have given me a way to remember what I experienced before I was sent down into this world.’

This is the reason why the marriage of a man and a woman was given a special place; that is, there was a requirement that a marriage had to be performed in church. And there a priest would stand witness as the bride and groom both expressed their promise that God exists; that they would always worship God; that they would live their lives in happiness, harmony and as one soul between wife and husband. The same is true in Islam; it is a requirement. A marriage is not valid unless both have expressed something like a promise in which they say that they believe in God and God’s power, and promise to live in harmony as husband and wife. That is how it is.

So it is clear that marriage, or to say it plainly in a way that is easy to understand, the union between a man and a woman, is the re-experience for human beings that can enable them to receive and feel where they come from, the beginning of their existence, and how they return, how they will die. But it is different now from the way it used to be. Nowadays there are so many worldly temptations that, whether they like it or not, human beings are swept away by the current of their wants, by the current of their desires, with the result that the union between a man and woman is no longer a re-experience of a state they need to be aware of, but just something to fulfil their wish and their desire.

For this reason, brothers and sisters, the latihan is very important. That is because, even though as yet you are not so advanced, this is the training that will remove the screens that cover the secrets of life that have not yet been revealed. Some of you have received this to some extent. Bapak does not need to tell you who, but there are those among you who have received it.

Toyko, Japan - July 28, 1967
Code Number : 67 TYO 9
This house is called Baital Makmur. If you have reached this, then you will be able to understand what the Latihan kejiwaan of Subud is, and the reason why God gives it to man. So far-reaching is the Latihan kejiwaan, brothers and sisters. It is not that Bapak belittles you, but in doing or receiving the Latihan kejiwaan, it can be said you only began yesterday. Whereas there are many brothers who have done the Latihan for as long as twenty or thirty years and are still groping in the dark.

Bapak will continue so that you can get a clear picture. Bapak does not restrain the brothers in their wish to write about the Latihan kejiwaan. Indeed, these brothers are just like little children who are pleased to have a new toy. A little child that has just received a toy is, of course, very pleased with it and very fond of it. It is best not to prevent these brothers - just let them write. But they will not be able to give a clear description of the meaning of the Latihan kejiwaan of Subud, for they have not yet reached the level which Bapak has illustrated.

As proof, it seems that, of all our brothers and sisters who are here, the greater number are not yet able to control the sex feeling, so that they continue to suffer disappointment in the relationship between man and woman. This serves as proof that they are not yet able to do so. If a man has reached the first house, he will be able to give satisfaction to a woman. Conversely, it is the same with a wife towards her husband, so that although they are two people, the two become one. Now to give you an example, try to receive. If Bapak knocks at this table your sex organ will surely move.

Cilandak, Indonesia - December 28, 1968
Code Number : 68 TJK 7
Your promise to your wife is also one of the many promises that come to light - that is, the promise you made at the time when you and your bride were about to be married. At that time you made a promise contained in the words: Ashadu Alla Illaha'illalloh, wa'ashadu ana, Muham-madar Rasul Allah ( I bear witness that there is no God but Allah and that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah ), and inwardly you affirmed and promised that your bride would be your wife forever. Such a promise is actually due to the working of the Qodar, and so you feel an exposure of your shortcoming in fulfilling your worship of Almighty God and in maintaining the closeness of your marriage, in harmony, tranquility and peace. All this happens because of the working of the Qodar. Moreover, there are still many more results which are evidence of the working of the Qodar, but Bapak only puts before you those that are most necessary.

As purification takes place in the inner-feeling, your outer situation certainly becomes better, or at least begins to improve, because your inner-feeling is comparable to a film. Whether or not a picture seen projected on the white screen is well executed or good depends on the picture that is in the lens and is then projected onto the white screen. In other words, if the lens contains a picture well executed and good, automatically the picture seen on the white screen is well executed and good. It is the same in your own situation. If your inner-feeling becomes clean and well-ordered, your outer condition will meet good and well-ordered life situations. So it is obviously very necessary for you to receive and follow the way of the latihan kejiwaan of Subud; the more so if you add the practice of fasting every month of Ramadan and also practice some prihatin every Monday and Thursday.

Bapak says this because, by adding the practice of fasting during the month of Ramadan and every Monday and Thursday, the dirt and faults which have begun to be cleansed from the inner-feeling cannot come back again, or the nafsu of greed and anger which have been eliminated from your inner-feeling will not return again to influence your inner-feeling. Such is the use and benefit of fasting during the month of Ramadan and every Monday and Thursday. You should not just complain, without being willing to examine the reasons why the experience of an unhappy fate in life has befallen you.

Bapak has frequently heard that when unhappiness is experienced in marriage, the husband blames his wife, saying that the unhappiness is her fault; and conversely the wife puts the blame for the unhappiness on the husband, so that in the end each one blames the other, with the result that a marriage which has lasted for many years breaks up.

Indeed, brothers and sisters, this is more or less what people experience in their marriages. As far as possible, therefore, you should prevent this happening, and there seems to be no other way to do so but for husband and wife to practice fasting together every month of Ramadan as well as every Monday and Thursday. Do not be quick to blame each other, which easily causes the break-up of a marriage that has already been blessed by Almighty God with children. You need to feel deeply what Bapak has said above so that it does not happen that children are born of a disharmonious marriage. If you remember, at the time when you were about to marry, you were of one accord in saying that you would keep your promise to remain married to each other until you became grandfather and grandmother and had children of noble character who would fulfill your hopes and desires.

Indeed, brothers and sisters, although marriage is a natural necessity in man's life on earth, it is in truth a great struggle, because at times in marriage things are experienced that easily cause disturbance.

Therefore, if a man wishes to find a marriage partner, Bapak's advice to him is that he should look for a woman whose character is very much like his mother's, and in marriage that woman will show him love and affection like his mother's. Likewise, when a woman looks for a husband, the man's character should be similar to her father's, and in marriage he will show her love and affection like her father's. But if you have not been able to achieve this, and especially if you have already married on the basis of the nafsu only and yet would like your marriage to endure harmoniously and eternally, it is necessary for you to yield to each other and always be mindful of the promises which you made to each other before you married. Is it not true that before your marriage you expressed love and affection for each other? This is what must be remembered by those of you whose marriage was based on the nafsu. You should not blame each other when you experience times of unhappiness in life.

Bapak understands that everyone seeks happiness, an honored position and a pleasant way of life. To attain these, however, it is not sufficient to complain and blame each other; it is necessary to work for them and at the same time to practice prihatin, by decreasing the pleasures of eating and sleeping, and avoiding all kinds of pleasure, and also by really wanting to do your work as well as possible. These practices were recommended in books written by our forefathers who said: "djer basuki mawa baja" i.e., there is no happiness without a price. This means that happiness and honor must be bought with sincere effort and prihatin. In the case of our own Spiritual Brotherhood of Subud it is the same. Subud will progress and develop splendidly when you really strive for that sincerely and for well being in your own life, because Subud is you and you are Subud.

Cilandak, Indonesia - October 15, 1969
Code Number : 69 TJK 6
That is why Bapak always reminds the helpers not to leave new members to themselves time and again, after they have been opened, without noticing whether they are truly able to feel the latihan kejiwaan of Subud. In addition, the helpers should give explanations about the basis and aim of the latihan. This is necessary so that people do not expect the latihan kejiwaan of Subud to be like a magic exercise that can bring good luck, increase business, secure a promotion in work, or enable a person to find a suitable, young and beautiful marriage partner, and so on.

Bapak says this because there are still many Subud members who have such notions, as shown by the number of letters which come to Bapak with questions like the following:

"Bapak I have joined Subud and have done the latihan for five or six years, but my life situation is still unsatisfactory. When will my life get better?"

Others ask: "Since I joined Subud, my business has gone downhill; when will my business flourish again?"

Again others ask: "Since I have joined Subud I feel the desire to marry. Can Bapak give me an indication, please, who the person is, his or her name, and where he or she lives, and when I can get married?", and other questions which show, on the whole, that many members are only seeking something pleasant.

It is true, brothers and sisters, that almost everyone hopes for and wants something pleasant, and the possibility of obtaining this does exist, if one fulfils the condition of true worship of Almighty God - that means, if one worships Almighty God with complete patience, trustful acceptance and submission. Patience ( sabar ) means to be willing to wait and to resist the influence of the nafsu that want immediate fulfillment of one's hopes. Trustful acceptance ( tawakal ) means to receive and just accept whatever comes or is experienced. Sincere submission ( ichlas ) means not to feel disappointed or troubled if something goes from one and disappears.

People who are interested in joining Subud also need to understand explanations like those Bapak has given above. Before they join Subud it is necessary for them really to understand the basis and aim of the latihan kejiwaan and to understand what Subud is.

Jakarta, Indonesia - August 8, 1971
Code Number : 71 TJK 5
Bapak knows, Bapak receives, that many members, not to mention helpers, still do not really understand, do not realize, what the latihan Kejiwaan of Subud truly is. As a result, they still seek to know whether there are other ways of making speedier progress in receiving the latihan Kejiwaan, other ways of increasing their ability to comprehend and be aware of the latihan Kejiwaan.

Bapak still hears this, still receives this. That is why it is essential that Bapak be able to write for you all. Certainly much can be written, but so far, it can be said, Bapak has had almost no time to write. Why? Because there are still many letters. And yet of the letters received by Bapak not ninety percent, not eighty percent, deal with the Kejiwaan. On the contrary, ninety percent of them concern ordinary matters, for example: ‘What is right for me, Bapak? I always quarrel with my wife.’ The husband says he quarrels with his wife and the wife quarrels with her husband. ‘Should I stay married, or should I divorce?’ There are others: ‘Bapak, I have received an inheritance from my parents, but the whole of it did not come to me. I want my share to be larger than the others. How should I go about getting it?’ Again: ‘Bapak, I have been divorced from my wife, but although she does not love me I still love her. How can I arrange for our marriage to continue into old age?’

Helpers of the local groups can really deal with such matters. If not, they can go higher, that is, ask the regional helpers to settle the matter or give an opinion by testing. If a matter cannot he resolved in that way, then go up to the Kejiwaan Council of National Helpers. If this too is unsatisfactory, then they have to present the matter to Bapak. Thus a problem should be submitted to Bapak only after, listing them from the top, the national, regional and local helpers have failed to solve it.

Jakarta, Indonesia - August 10, 1971
Code Number : 71 TJK 8
Cultural performances produced from thinking, studying and other considerations are different. A person watching and listening to them can get quite confused. That is to say, he may forget about his home, a woman may forget her husband, the husband may forget his wife. The performer is also affected, and so may go astray, and when the play is finished the actor or actress may go off with someone who has watched the performance, or chase after someone who has listened to it. That can be the result. Bapak says this only as a reminder, but maybe you have been able to receive and feel for yourselves that in your performances you have not been influenced a hundred percent by the heart and mind, but already perhaps twenty or thirty percent or even forty percent by the jiwa. If someone acts as a clown and this comes from his jiwa, then he will make people laugh if he just stands there. This is true culture.

Jakarta, Indonesia - August 16, 1971
Code Number : 71 TJK 13

Through the latihan kejiwaan you will automatically become conscious of how to be united in feeling with one another. God has ordained this unity by creating woman. The man becomes one with her and she with him.

Supposing, for example, there has been discord between a man and his wife throughout their married life, and then the man or wife wishes for a change of marriage partner in order to achieve unity: if there has been no unity with the first partner, there will be none with another.

It is a man's duty to understand his wife's feelings so that he can reach a higher state. When he is able to feel how she feels, then he can certainly be aware of and feel other people's feelings.

This is like a stepping stone. But you are still incapable of being in unison with your own wives and sharing their feelings as also are wives with their husbands, and still less with other people.

Here is proof for you, because, from the aspect of the kejiwaan, you are certainly guided and led in such situations, so that you can remain married until the end.

Jakarta, Indonesia - August 23, 1971
Code Number : 71 TJK 15
The union of husband and wife in marriage is not to be compared to the feeling one has, for example, in tasting a delicious beefsteak or a spicy seasoning. The union of husband and wife inspires patience and sincere submission.

As a matter of fact, a miser who would not give away ten dollars, or even one dollar or a quarter of a dollar, might give up half his wealth if a beautiful woman asked him for it. So the union of husband and wife is clearly far different from taking food. The difference is the union of feeling, of the inner feeling, and this gives rise to patience, manifested in the nafsu mutmainah.

Thus the union of a man and a woman or a man and his wife should not be compared with pleasures, such as drinking coffee in a bar; no. It is a uniting or a way of experiencing a compelling feeling that is truly rooted in the jiwa.

Consequently you who are married should never say you will divorce if things do not suit you. Don't do that; it would degrade you to the material realm again. That, of course, is the way the material forces influence your inner feeling, so that you have no knowledge of your fellow beings, you do not know how others are. This is shown by parents who are not in harmony with their children, and by brothers and sisters who quarrel among themselves. The disharmony and disagreements are caused by the material force.

Los Angeles, California USA - April 19, 1972
Code Number : 72 LAX 2
Bapak says that with the birth of Subud everything is, as it were, in the open. What you used to think was hidden is now revealed. When everything is in the open, so that you know other people and other people know you, what need is there to cover things up? If there is no need to cover up, you will become harmonious with one another because you know one another. Your states of disharmony exist because you do not know one another. If you knew one another, you would be in harmony.

Marriage provides evidence of this, brothers and sisters. Why is it that where there is a married couple, it is necessary for the wife also to join Subud if her husband does? Why not just the husband alone, without any need for the wife to join Subud ? She also needs to join Subud; she also needs to receive the latihan. In this way not only does the husband know the wife's secrets but also the wife knows the husband's secrets, so that if both their Jiwas develop and both rise to a higher level and both make progress in the latihan kejiwaan, both make progress in receiving guidance from the One Almighty God, then the woman at home will know what her husband is doing in some other place, and what state he is in. She will know clearly. If her husband is misbehaving, she will be aware and will know.

It will be the same the other way round ; if the wife misbehaves, the husband will know it. If each of them know about the other, so that the secrets of this one are known to that one and the secrets of that one are known to this one, they will of course be in harmony, because if I am doing such and such in some other place you will still know it. In this way the marriage will become harmonious, because each is able to know the other. In this way you can be said to be of one mind. Thus the husband says A and the wife says A ; the husband says B and the wife says B. It is like that. That is what is called marriage, brothers and sisters. If you pinch the wife, the husband will feel it; pinch the husband and the wife will feel it.

If that can happen between you, then your marriage will exist not only in this world but in the next. Indeed one or two of you can already receive this.

Ibu has died and left this world; Bapak is still in this world. Sometimes Ibu comes to visit you and tells you that you must really follow Bapak and trust him. Bapak is still alive. Ibu understands:

"I am no longer living out in the world; I am living in heaven. But I know Bapak. You must follow him, you must obey him, you must believe in what he says."

Washington, DC, USA - May 5, 1972
Code Number : 72 WAS 1
Bapak will illustrate this with something simple that women are used doing, cooking that is. If when you are cooking food you receive guidance from God, then the food you cook will be different from the rest, both in flavor and in the good it does. It can be said that what you cook will not only taste good, but it will act like a medicine in a variety of troubles. Suppose that your husband is upset about something, his distress or agitation will disappear as soon as he eats the food you have cooked. If your husband has bad habits, for example, his bad behavior will cease when he eats the food you've cooked. In this way what you cook will form an effective cure, so that your husband will no longer enjoy eating out and staring at other women. Of course, it is alright for him to look at them, so long as he only looks, but his heart should not be looking at others. This is only one instance from among a great many.

For a man, if he is really able to run an enterprise that does not separate him from his worship of God, he will know what his real talent is, so that what ever he works at and whatever he does, people will readily notice it, because it will attract the attention of anyone who sees it. It is the same for what is in your self. Suppose that you have been doing the latihan kejiwaan for eleven or twelve years. Earlier, before you started to do the latihan kejiwaan, people liked you and you had close friends, but after doing the latihan kejiwaan for twelve years you may have lost your friends and people may even dislike you. What is the reason for that ?

It is clear that your kejiwaan is not yet properly developed. If it were properly developed, the reverse would certainly be happening. Anyone who saw you would feel affection for you. Anyone who came near you would feel happy. It would be like listening to a very sweet song very inward. Or like being near to something that shone brightly, for instance. But at present it is actually not like that; it is even the opposite. It is as if when you try to approach someone that person even goes away. What is the reason ? After all, you are reasonably well dressed. Why, when you approach someone, does that person turn away ? They feel bored, as it were; not alarmed, but they feel touchy, ill at ease.

Thus everything is already clear to your own selves. Someone may, for instance, claim "I am really already almost like the angels. When I eat, I eat with the angels. Why do my friends and acquaintances nevertheless dislike me now, more and more as time goes on?" Obviously what he says about being almost like an angel is not true. He is not close to the angels; he is close to the devils. That is why his friends and other people do not like him.

It is thus clear, brothers sisters, that the evidence of his own self will reveal the development of a person's jiwa. This is why it is stated that people who have received grace from the One Almighty God, people who have received the blessing of the One Almighty God, possess the four characteristics of sidih, amanat, tabligh and fatunah. Sidih means wisdom; to be wise but not through any learning. Amanat means that whatever its possessor says, whatever he tells people, will only produce happiness and satisfaction in those who hear it, and also they will grasp and follow all the instruction given in this way. Tabligh means to be a peace maker not just making peace between people who are quarrelling, but also making the household peaceful, with harmony between husband and wife, wife and husband. Thus it means making peace both inside the home and outside it, which means making peace between people who are quarrelling. Fattunah means honest, faithful and surrendered to the One Almighty God.

The most excellent kind of person has this kind of nature. So if you are not yet in harmony at home you cannot yet be called tabligh. That is only your own state that is not yet tabligh, let alone being able to pacify people who are quarrelling, whereas this is the nature people ought to possess, and such are those who obtain the blessing of God, who obtain grace.

Skymont, VA, USA - May 6, 1972
Code Number : 72 SKY 1
Bapak tells you that you should start a farm here, or raise livestock. If you do it in the right way, looking after animals will not cause your hearts to go into the animals, but as you work with them there will be no break in your worship of God, because what you are doing is done by the will of God. When you die, for one can die in any place and at any moment, it is not certain that you will die in bed, with you wife or your husband beside you. That is not certain. Thus at the moment of death your soul will not go into a cow; no. It will not go into a sheep or a goat; no. Your soul will go back to God, and so too will the sheep or goat which is in your presence if you slaughter a sheep which you have raised; the sheep will go straight to God and will not enter into you. If the sheep were to enter into you, you would start to bleat. You would become like a sheep. Thus we always make a link between three levels; God - man - the work being done. If you are working with concrete, working for a builder, you mix and pour concrete. Thus if you die while you are working with concrete and you are not cut off from Allah, Allah, Allah, you die and return to God. But if you are cut off from Allah, Allah, Allah, and from God, you die and you go into the concrete. There you are, between the stones below you and the stones above you.

Cilandak, Indonesia - November 26, 1972
Code Number : 72 TJK 11
Then there is another nafsu that is also close to you; the nafsu mutmainah. This arises from the jasmaniah life force, the human life force. You need this nafsu that comes from the jasmaniah life force, and you need to use it, for this is really the energy for life, the energy for being able to hand life on; for marrying, that is. Suppose you ask whether an unmarried man is less energetic about earning a living and securing to himself all the things that make for well-being and a sufficiency in this world, well, yes, he too can do this, he has the urge to do it, but he does not feel it so strongly. It is indeed decreed by God that people should marry, for human marriage is a union. And you need to learn and to practice an awareness of the nature of this union between men and women, so that you can really feel this oneness.

It is important for you in the first place so that you can understand; you will not be able to understand the heart of other people until you can understand the heart of your own wife. Just think about that. Women give more praise to other men then they do to their own husband. Why is that? It is because their husbands are not yet one with them. If a woman's husband is really able to be one with her, then no other men can come up to him. You can think how it will be then if someone asks her who is the best looking man in Jakarta. Yes, she will probably say it is her own husband. Yes, and if she is asked who has the best heart of all the men in Jakarta - ah, it is hard to find him. The easy way is just to feel. Yes, probably her husband. This is how it is when you are really able to be united. In every case the wife will give the praise to her husband. If religion advocates revering a stone, if a piece of wood is to be revered as something holy, then how much more so her husband. Thus if a wife honors her husband she produces or opens the way for him to live quite easily. But if she finds fault with her own husband, what then? Then the husband gets annoyed and cannot find his way. He feels disgusted and wonders what he has done to deceive this fate. That is because his wife nags at him; then the husband just wants to sleep; he cannot earn a living but only sleeps.

It is a pity there are no women present, and so the women do not hear this. This is why a husband is said to be like a teacher for his wife. But you must not then feel pleased with yourselves; if Bapak puts it like that, you may feel proud and demand that your wife submit to you.

This is why these nafsu are important for you, brothers. Thus by means of this nafsu called mutmainah people such as yourselves can come to obtain and to be able to feel oneness in your lives; if you have been able to feel oneness between two people, you can more or less be aware of what cause brought you into existence here. Since it was that, it is the same as your existence. Now it remains for you to feel your relation to the future existence of the children who will arise from you. Like that.

Thus it is clear brothers, as Bapak has said, that in reality, that knowledge is already there in your own selves. There is no need to go looking for it all over the place. It is enough with your own wife if you are able to feel it. If you cannot feel it, in Subud you eventually will; and in all the rest too.

Cilandak, Indonesia - November 24, 1973
Code Number : 73 CDK 15
Bapak had a letter from Japan telling about a member who had been dead for forty days, or maybe it was three months, and who came and joined in a Latihan again. It happened that during the Latihan one of the members was still outside. He had not yet gone in, feeling as though he wanted to wait for a Subud member who had not yet come. Sure enough one did come. When the man saw the new arrival, he realized that this member had died and had already been dead for forty days or maybe three months, but being so startled he forgot that. The one who had just arrived even spoke to him: 'Oh, you're still outside, not doing the Latihan.' 'Yes, I was waiting for you.' 'Ah, I was expected. Let's go in.' They then joined the Latihan.

During their Latihan together this man was incapable of asking any questions. It was as though he was gagged. He went on with his Latihan, and when it was finished he was invited to leave with the visitor: 'Let's go back together, shall we need a taxi?' 'No point in that,' he replied, 'let's walk.' The man's house was quite near. The visitor said 'I just have a message to give you. I've left my wife behind, and her children are still small. I'm asking you to help. Find some work for her, for my wife. Have pity on my children whom I have left while they are still young. That's my message, and here you are, home. Good night.'

Yes, they had reached his house and the visitor walked away. Only after entering his house did the man remember that the other had already died. Then he thought, 'Oh, in that case I'll go to his wife's place at once.' He went to the wife's house, and then promised to look for work for her, with the result that eventually she got a job.

Well, how about that! That was in a letter that came here. Maybe Nak Darto remembers it, have I forgotten anything?

Cilandak, Indonesia - February 3, 1974
Talk to women helpers
Code Number : 74 CDK 2
Those of you who are widows, or widowers if you are men, which applies only to Bapak, try to feel how it is. You have been widowed and your husband has left you behind. You feel as if you have lost something when he has disappeared. What is it that feels that lost disappearance, and who and what has disappeared? It is the heart, sisters. Thus it is your heart that feels the loss, sisters. You feel you have lost your husbands. In fact it is not really like that, sisters. No, you will really be able to witness this and know the truth of what Bapak is saying here, when you are able to receive the connection between before you came into this World and after you have left it. It is always guided by the One Almighty God.

For those of you who have not so far been able to feel this and to know it, it is a question of time. It is a question of time before you can know. But later on, when you do know, you will know it is like this.

Why does Bapak say this? It is because you have already received your limitations. These limitations are in the heart and mind. These limitations are in the nafsu. If you have been able to clear away these nafsu, you will have seen that your husband is not separated from you. Nor is a widower separated from his wife. No. Thus you will not feel his life is a matter of uncertainty; you will feel certainty.

In ancient history, what is called incarnation resembles this. But in Subud an incarnation is not a fixed certainty. No; this incarnation is not of a kind that needs to come into existence, for indeed it already exists. Thus the nature of the incarnation can fall and it can also rise. Why is that? It is because this kind of incarnation is caused by one's karma. In the latihan kejiwaan it is not because of karma, but because of one's faults; never being able to receive and feel separation from what is covering one over - the nafsu.

Cilandak, Indonesia - May 19, 1974
Code Number : 74 CDK 7
Brothers and sisters, God does indeed intend human beings to pair off, to marry; and not only human beings, but all the creatures He has made. For marriage symbolizes the union of the one that has authority with the one that lacks authority, of the one that overcomes with the one that is overcome, of the higher with the lower.

That is the real reason why in Javanese a man is said to be lanang, ala-ala menang, dominant, whatever he is like. Thus man, the male, is the creature made by God to have authority, to have authority in this world, and not only in the case of human beings. That is why it is said that the human race increases because of the man; but it is not through the man alone, for without woman he could not develop the human seed that can increasingly fill this world with human beings as time goes on.

Further to this, brothers and sisters, in Javanese a wife is called wadon. Wadon means a vessel, a vessel of creation, or a vessel for the development of the human seed. Thus she is like a factory, and it is very necessary for a woman to find a husband who possesses the seed that can be prepared in this factory so that it develops into the best kind of human being, one of significance to society, one of benefit to the communal life.

That is how it is in reality, but what Bapak has said is only a brief explanation, brothers and sisters; whereas if one looks for the significance of people marrying, the purpose of marriage does indeed involve hard work. In fact married people can be said to be going to experience and undertake the hardest work there is in life.

For that reason many people are afraid to marry. Why? Because of what has just been said. Although the married state is said to be happy or pleasant or joyful, actually it is not just like that. Wherever there is joy, there also is sorrow, and conversely where there is suffering there is joy. So married people can be said to pass through a kind of test in life.

Cilandak, Indonesia - October 26, 1974
Talk Given At The Celebration Of The Engagement Between R.T. and L.H.
Code Number : 74 CDK 19

Cilandak, Indonesia - October 26, 1974
At the wedding of Muchsin and Halimah
Code Number : 74 CDK 20

Cilandak, Indonesia - December 24, 1974
Code Number : 74 CDK 23

Brothers and sisters, although mankind is destined to marry on earth, so as to be able to grow in number and add to the well-being and prosperity of the world, for human beings themselves marriage is a test, a test for their life.

Bapak will go on to enlarge a little more on marriage, brothers and sisters. If a marriage bears fruit, meaning that in time there is a child, and if that child is such as the parents would ask for, then they have a child who grows up following and obeying what his parents tell him to do. But should they have a child who does not do as his parents tell him, they feel that life has rejected them, that in part they have died.

This is what comes of the marriage. So it is important and very necessary for grandchildren Soesilo and Roekmini in their marriage to start now and never cease to take care. As Bapak has indicated, let not the wife become like an enemy in her husband's arms, but become his closest friend in whom he can fully confide.

Brothers and sisters, harmony in marriage affects not only the life of the family, but their setting also, that is to say, their community and the state.

At times, as Bapak has said, parents are forgetful; at times, because of the wife, their actions fall below the right level. Yes; and why? Owing to the needs of life, of course. But if the wife becomes, not her husband's enemy, but his closest friend, sharing all his secrets, then everything can be weighed up, can be sifted beforehand, so that things which might ruin the husband's reputation, which might in the long run disgrace him, can be guarded against.

So, brothers and sisters, Bapak's hope, directed especially to the bridal couple, is that they may be watchful through out their life, that their life may be carefully considered, to the end that everything they do may be done without short comings, or in other words may be done well and be in no way lacking.

Cilandak, Indonesia - March 28, 1976
Code Number : 76 CDK 5
Brothers and sisters, Bapak will go on talking about enterprises. Actually the world already provides an example in the existence of something now highly developed: beauty salons. Now then, this is something the young members can do, can't they? How is it they are only capable of going to beauty salons, and do not set up their own! That's amiss, isn't it? So these members, you young ones, should be able to do this yourselves. At present, to replace your clothes you buy them. Well, why? Why not make them yourselves?

Try it, together with your friends, for on your own you are not strong enough. With your friends you can build something up. So the way to do it is collectively, the way to do it is by working together. Don't let it happen that, the longer we go on, the more we are pushed aside. Try to remember that. Bapak has had experience of it, for Bapak is already seventy-seven years old, Bapak was not born yesterday. As time went on we were increasingly pushed aside, pushed aside Bapak says, by a breed of people who had the ability to work. They pushed and pushed us away, and in time we fell into the river.

Yes, look! Formerly we were in the outskirts of the city there. We were pushed back by those who knew how to work -pushed back, pushed back. Bapak is not saying by the Chinese, no. We were pushed back by those who knew how to work. Gradually, as time went on we were pushed farther and farther out, right into the river. Well, that's where we are. Is that where we should be, submerged, or what? Surely not, eh? This State of Indonesia is your place. So be on your guard. Don't keep being pushed aside. But as well as not being pushed aside, we shouldn't push others aside. There's no need. This being our State, what need is there to push people aside? That would result in us going under soon afterwards.

Thus the world already offers examples. So it is said in the words of God that the roh kudus ( the holy spirit ) is the roh malaikat ( the spirit of the angels ). It exists within the human self, it exists also outside the human self, as guidance. So the angels give us human beings guidance, that which we can receive within the self being the more important, for it cannot be discovered either by other people or by ourselves.

But there are also outward indications. The outward ones are the cases where what happens is outside us. That is to say, at this time many people like to eat delicious food. Although just now all sorts of things are said to be dear, even so people like to eat delicious food. And there are also many people now requiring meals out. Well, do you at present like to buy food or do you like to provide it? So you should start now, you young ones, to train yourselves to be skilled at cooking food for the people who like to buy it.

Yes, in short, the world is full of examples. Don't belittle yourselves: 'Oh, it's just me, what can I do?' Well, don't be like that. One is a man. So if one is a man, can one be supposed not to be? No. So don't belittle yourselves. If you belittle yourselves, how much more will other people belittle you. That's how it is.

Why, it's like men with wives. The wives are schooled to respect them. Well now, if their own wives are not willing to respect them, how much less willing will the wives of other men be. They bid their wives respect them.

But a man who is respected by his wife must not get conceited: 'Aha, now my wife has come to respect me.' Not that. There must be an even balance. A man must pay attention to a woman's lot, too. He must know and understand her. One whose wife is used to eating butter, say, must not fob her off with soya sauce. Yes, let her be given butter. How can that be done? Well, why can't you get it, so that she has butter to eat? Then, if you have obtained it, so that she has it to eat, you have had to go in search of it to please her, and hence the wife respects her husband: 'My goodness, what a fine husband mine is, so manly, such a gentleman.' It's like that, isn't it?

In this world, then, it's very necessary to love one another, to respect one another. Not just other people. A husband and wife need to respect each other too.

If your husband gives way to you, don't bully him. Don't do that. So, too, the other way round: if your wife gives way to you, don't bully her. Thus you are equal; but if you are equal, don't be equally aggressive, be equally yielding. Being equal, then, means being equally yielding, not equally aggressive. Being equally aggressive will wreck your home. All the plates will go flying!

So, clearly, the lessons in religion and especially in what has been training us, Subud full of the understanding of life. Truly. Yes. If Bapak when still young had sung for money, well, he would have been rich. Truly. If Bapak had been paid for his voice, no-one could have competed with him. That was when Bapak was still young. In those days, when Bapak sang a pangkur, why, his voice was highly developed. Indeed it was. When women heard Bapak, heard Bapak's pangkur, they were enthralled. Well, now he is old, his voice is such as it is, and he couldn't sing a pangkur pleasingly if he wanted to. If he sang a pangkur a little too long he would be out of breath.

Plainly then, brothers and sisters, the Latihan is filled with understanding. So if you earnestly persevere with and have faith in what exists in your Latihan of Life, it will be impossible for you to keep on complaining. Impossible. Yes, but don't forget Bapak when everything is going well; when you meet Bapak, don't turn aside. Now don't do that.

Melbourne, Australia - April 14, 1976
Code Number : 76 MEB 2
So do not impose a heavy burden on the helpers by asking them to test all sorts of things which are, let's say, like, yes, whether I should go to the cinema or something like that, or even things like Bapak says, whether I should start this business, would it be profitable, or should I move to the other place or something like that. So better if you reserve testing for things that are really important.

The fortune teller said, "Yes, indeed, this nightmare that you have had is a grave warning for you that if you go as you plan to do on a journey for strength of purpose of trade, you will have a terrible accident. You will be set upon by robbers and killed. So I advise you not to go out of your house for at least a month." So he went home and he was very depressed and his wife was very depressed.

And at the time his wife said to him, "Husband, I think, O.K. you had a dream. You've been to the fortune teller and no doubt what he said is right. But still my advice to you is do some prihatin, do some fasting, reduce your eating, don't sleep after midnight, just sleep up to midnight and after midnight pray to God that He may send you some sign or some indication of what's the true meaning of your dream so you can know for yourself."

So indeed he did this, followed his wife's advice and after two weeks of doing this, it's true that in the morning when he was praying he heard a voice and this voice said to him, "You can set out on your journey as you planned, but on the way you will see when you are going where you want to go, you will see in a place two big trees growing next to each other. And when you see those two trees, go to that place because there you will learn the true meaning of your dream."

So the next day he told his wife what had happened and he said, "I think I had better go and do what I have been told."

So his wife said, "Yes, and I will pray for you while you are away so that no harm will come to you and that you will get what you want."

So he went and true enough after he had traveled for some time he saw these two large trees growing side by side. And he told his camel to eat some grass, or whatever camels eat and he sat down under the tree. And after a time suddenly out of nowhere, unexpectedly, a little child came to him, about ten years old, and touched him on his shoulder.

"Who are you and why do you touch me?"

The child said, "Because I have some business with you." So the child said, "Isn't it true that you had a terrible dream two weeks ago?" He said, "How did you know that?"

"Never mind. Isn't it true that you went to a fortune teller and you were told not to go forth and do business for a month?" He said, "Yes, that’s all true." "So how come? Why are you going?"

"Well because of this and this. I did this and this and then I was told that I should come here and I should come to this place with the two trees."

The little child said, "Exactly, and that's why I'm here. Now do you believe in God or not?"

So he said, "Yes, I believe in God, but so what?"

So he said, "Well, if you believe in God, if you truly have faith in God, then there is nothing that can happen to you which can cause you to be scared, or to be frightened."

So he said, "Yes, O.K., I believe in God, but where is God, what is God like, how is He going to help me?"

The little child said, "That's not it. If you really have faith in God than that's enough. You don't have to think about where is God and how He will help you, because faith in God means having faith in yourself. It means you have self confidence and are willing to face everything that may happen to you. Because life and death are then in the hands of God alone, and you no longer worry about what might happen to you, or about what a fortune teller might say, but you simply go ahead and you face whatever may come your way with confidence in yourself and in the power of God, for everything is in God's hands."

So he said to this, the man said, "Yes I understand." So then it was as if he was drowsy, although he had his eyes open, he was drowsy. When he suddenly opened his eyes again, or he came to, he looked around. The little child was gone which was strange because he could see very far because it was a kind of desert.

So he thought, "Well, very well. I understand that I should not worry about this what has happened and what the fortune teller said. I Just go ahead and do my business."

So he got on his camel and went on his way. And he reached an oasis where he put up for the night. And he gave his camel to drink and so on and so on, and went to sleep. During his sleep he had a terrible nightmare that he was attacked by a band of robbers, and he was all beaten up and robbed and finally they cut his throat. And he was so scared that at that moment when they cut his throat he woke up. And it was exactly what the fortune teller had prophesied for him. That he would be set upon by a band of robbers and he would be killed. But it was in a dream, so that his dream which the fortune teller interpreted was answered with a dream. So he realized that it was this dream which the fortune teller had foretold. It wasn't reality at all. So he went on and went to the city where he wanted to trade and he did a lot of good business, and he came back loaded with money. And on the way home before he reached his house he met the first class fortune teller.

And the fortune teller said, "I thought I told you not to go out to do business. How come? Where have you been?"

He said, "Well, listen, this happened. I had this indication, I went to this place, I met this little boy."

( Oh yes, I left a piece out, I'm sorry. ) After he had this dream about the robbers, he met the little child again on the road and he told the child that he had had this dream about the robbers and the little child knew exactly. "That was the thing that the fortune teller prophesied."

He said, "Well, who are you? How come you know all this?"

He said, "You don't have to ask, but now the story is finished."

So when he was talking to the fortune teller again he explained to him about the little boy, and the fortune teller said, "Oh yes, because that was not a human being, but an angel." So he understood from this what is the true meaning of faith in God.

So, Bapak has told you this little story to explain more clearly what Bapak wants us to understand about testing. That what is important for us is to have faith in God Almighty and to go ahead with confidence and do what we have to do. And not always to stop and test. In other words, you want to do this, you first stop and you test. No I shouldn't do this. O.K., you won't do it. Should I have my lunch? You test it. No, you shouldn't have your lunch. So finally you cannot do anything. You can never get anywhere because you are always going around in circles. So don't do that. Simply have faith in God and go ahead with confidence in yourself and in the power of God.

Melbourne, Australia - April 15, 1976
Code Number : 76 MEB 3
So because this latihan kejiwaan, as Bapak said earlier, is something which comes from beyond our minds; we cannot understand or know how it works. When we do the latihan kejiwaan, let us say we sing something in the latihan kejiwaan. It is something unconscious. We do not know where it comes from. If we try to understand it, we think to ourselves, "Why isn't it according to the 'do, re, me, fa, sol, la, re, do! that we sing? Why isn't it like that? Why is it something quite different?" But yet it comes from within us.

So, it is the same way in our work. When we are already used to it, when we know it, it will be something that fills whatever we do. We will be taught to do everything that we need to do in our work. We will be taught to do it in the right way. So we will he trained to laugh. If we are trained to laugh it means we will also be trained to quarrel. And this is something very important.

For example, quarrel between husband and wife. If it is guided by God, well let us say, quarreling between husband and wife is something that's already normal for mankind. If Bapak may say so, it is a form of culture. And one can say, it is said, that quarreling between husband and wife awakens a new love, a fresh love between them. But this is if the quarreling is aroused by God's power, by God Almighty. But if the quarreling is aroused by the nafsu, then far from leading to fresh love, it will lead to what is usually called divorce. So it is very important. And, as Bapak said, why is it that in the wayang, I don't know if you know the wayang, it's the Indonesian shadow play, when they are about to fight, they sing, 'I am about to hit you". And then he says, "All right, have a try." And then he says, "O.K., never mind." But if it's from the nafsu, before he’s even thought about it he's already hit the guy. So this is the difference. This is the difference when you are able already to work accompanied by the power of God which we feel in the latihan kejiwaan.

Tokyo, Japan - April 20, 1976
Code Number : 76 TYO 2
Such is the power of God, so that He creates all these things that we can never know. He is the One and Only Almighty God. That is why, because God loves His people, because He loves His creatures, if there is anything they wish for it is as if it has already been given to them. But sometimes people do not feel this. They believe rather that these things come from their own selves, and they do not understand that the very existence of these selves is derived from the One Almighty God. He is not somewhere far away, brothers and sisters.

You can yourselves think and feel how it will be when you die and whether you will be able to understand that kind of knowledge. Even when you are merely asleep you lose all your cleverness. When you sleep, your love for your wife is forgotten; even though she may be right there beside you, on your right or your left side, even though she may be in your arms, you forget. That is all that the power of the human mind is like. And yet human beings have gone so far in the use of their minds that they feel that they have power, so that they no longer believe in the One Almighty God.

Indeed, everything beings in a small way, begins at the bottom, begins with something easy. God will not just give you that much only; no, it will not just go only so far. It will spread wider and go deeper, so that later on, when you look at anything, you will be able to feel that there is something within your seeing that joins in your looking. In listening to anything, you will be able to feel that there is something within your hearing that joins in your listening. In smelling anything, you will be able to feel and receive and understand that there is something within your smelling that joins in your smelling. In feeling anything, you will be able to feel and receive and understand that there is something within your feeling that joins in your feeling; something very important for your life.

There is a secret that Bapak should explain. In the union of husband and wife, wife and husband, you would not guess that there is something that joins in the experience of this union. It goes deeper and deeper and deeper, until you are able to understand and to know what is good and what is not good, what is low and what is high.

This is how it is, brothers and sisters, and thus things happen at which people do not guess. Why do people have the heart to beat other people to death? Why do people have the heart to oppress other people and drive them to destitution? To the point where they have nothing to eat and are famished and starving to death? Why do people have the heart to live well themselves and let other people live in poverty?

This is what people have to understand, brothers and sisters, so that they can know the will of God, who has created human beings in this world.

San Francisco, CA USA - April 26, 1976
Code Number : 76 SFO 3
Brothers and sisters, it is necessary that you should realize that the higher and the deeper that you progress in the latihan kejiwaan, in, the spiritual way, the more fiercely the lower forces look for an opportunity to tempt you. And the more dangerous is your position. So it can be compared to someone climbing a tree, the higher you get, the greater danger you are in if you fall when you make a mistake. While you were only three or four meters from the ground, it didn't matter too much if you fell, you could still get up again. But the higher you get, the greater danger you are in. So this is a kind of parable compared to the spiritual way, and this is why it is necessary that you be very careful and very cautious as you go on. In order not to attract the temptation of the lower forces.

For example, for women, it is very important when they do the latihan, that they should dress as women, and not for example, to wear trousers. In other words, to wear the clothes of men, because really, that is not allowed. And to wear bikinis, that is even still more not allowed, because clothes symbolize the nafsu and if in your clothes, you adopt a form which does not correspond with your true nature, then you are also not able to receive that which corresponds to your own nature from within. So if you wear, for example, if you're women and you're doing latihan and you always wear clothes like men, then your actions and your behavior will also be like a man. And because the clothes represent the nafsu, so it means your heart will also become like the heart of a man. And the result of that is that your heart becomes close to that of a man. But the heart can be symbolized by petrol or gas; if a gas comes very close to a match or a lighter, there is a great danger that if the lighter is struck or a match is struck, everything goes up in flames. No matter now whether we call the woman the gas and the man is the match, or the woman is the match and the man is gas. The fact is the danger is there.

So, this is something that is very important for you to understand and to be aware of. Why is it Bapak is only now telling you about this? You may ask yourself, why is it that Bapak is only explaining this to us now? It is because there is no point to talk about life to children and in previous years you were still like children. Bapak could have said it a thousand times and you would not have understood what Bapak was talking about. But Bapak can see that your spiritual progress is beginning to show itself, is beginning to pile up. So now you are beginning to be able to understand when Bapak tells you these things. In other words, you are beginning to be able to know for yourself the truth of what Bapak has described? The result is for example, that a husband gradually finds that he no longer has a feeling of love for his wife. Why is that? Because she is not really a wife to him anymore. She has become like a man. You know very well that if you are a woman and you sit next to a woman you don't feel excited, you feel bored, and similarly vice-versa. So it is for a man who is married to a woman whose heart has become like a man, as though there is something missing, if Bapak may be absolutely blunt about it; it is like a flower who's fragrance is gone and there is left only the form. In other words, there is missing something that is exciting, something that is satisfying, something that is blissful. So, it is as though suddenly there is nothing holding them together anymore.

Los Angeles, California USA - April 30, 1976
Code Number : 76 LAX 1
Bapak will give you an example. Yes, of course it is because of the value of material things that before you have any money, for instance, that when you are walking you walk like this ( Bapak makes movements and walks about ). You trip over a pebble, you slip and fall, because you have no strength. But when you have five million in your pocket, a check for five million, then you walk like this... If a friend passes you - "Oh, did you not see me? .... Oh, I don't know if I did." – You do not want to see your friends.

Again. Before you have a weapon, a knife or a shot-gun, a revolver, a pistol, a sten-gun or a bren-gun, then if you hear a sound as you walk alone - tik, kitik, kitik.., cok, kocok, kocok - you go towards it and "Oh dear, it's a frog"... But when you are carrying a pistol on you, let alone a sten-gun, you feel brave. This is just by way of a small example, brothers and sisters.

Thus it is clear that these material objects have an extraordinary power. If you have ever seen that wayang play, what is the name of that character? The one who has the material force one hundred per cent in that story? If you have ever been in Indonesia you may know it... the king of Ngalengkadiraja; King Dasamuka. He was already married, but he still wished to posses the wife of another man, this Dasamuka. He already had a wife, who was actually a bidadari ( an angel or dewa). Dasamuka's first wife was named Dewi Untoro, and she was very beautiful. She was sweet and lovely. Why should he, when he looked at Sinta, who was not an angel, not a dewi, why should he wish to marry her, when he already had not just one wife, but forty? Yes; where the nafsu are concerned they never stop.

When you work, you adjust your daily needs to your income. But there are many people who, supposing they earn a thousand dollars a month, sometimes still find it is not enough: "Oh, when will my salary be raised to one thousand, one hundred dollars?" His employer agrees to give him this, and he gets one thousand one hundred. Again it is not enough. This goes on until he is getting the same amount as his boss, but it is still not enough. Eventually he is getting more than his boss, and it is still not enough. That is the heart.

As another example, brothers and sisters, let us take someone in trade. All the time he has been engaged in trade he has been making a profit of ten or fifteen million rupiahs a year, but on one occasion he only makes five million. Well, you can imagine how it is. Just because his profit is down, he is miserable. That is the heart. Yet he is still making a profit. It would be even worse if he were making no profit at all.

Thus it is clear that the influence of the nafsu, or of the nafsu that are always being ridden by those lower forces, the material or satanic forces, do not understand justice, goodness and virtue. Luckily for human beings, luckily for yourselves, besides being inhabited by the satanic or material force you are also inhabited by the vegetable force, the animal force, the ordinary human force and the force of the perfect human being who has been granted the grace by God to receive wahyu or revelation from God, that is, the rochaniah life force. That is fortunate for you.

Supposing you ask, "Bapak, how much per cent am I now of the rochaniah force?" Bapak will not answer you, because you have not yet finished with the material level, let alone talking about the rochaniah.

New York, NY USA - May 5, 1976
Code Number : 76 NYC 1
To have a physical body, you need food. But in all this, Bapak has not yet touched on the final one of these forces, which can be said to be the number one tempter for man, and again something that man cannot do without. It is the human force.

For indeed you may say, that men do not eat each other, men do not eat one another in the way that men eat beefsteak or whatever it is; and yet in a sense, they do. Because human beings eat each other in marriage, that is between men and women. But what they eat is not their flesh, but their feelings. You know very well, if you don't believe this, just consider for a moment how it is when a wife nags her husband. It is said that this is the greatest suffering, the greatest pain that a man can experience when he is nagged by his wife; and the reverse is also true. The pain that a woman experiences when she is berated by her husband, let us say. And this is because the two depend each other's feelings. And this is because in the relationship between man and woman, they indeed do eat each other's feelings or what is within them. And this indeed is always a temptation for man.

So that you see for example, a human being, a man who has already one wife, so let us say he has already the burden of one temptation, he still looks for another, and then for another, and then for another, so there are men who marry twenty times. But marrying officially is one thing, they even marry unofficially. In fact this is a subject which is something not nice to talk about, or let us say it is dirty. But how can Bapak avoid talking about it, since it is the reality of the human forces? That men sometimes even like to go out and have relations with prostitutes, or women who have no morality. Do not imagine that when men and women have sexual intercourse, that their influence does not touch the jiwa. Indeed that enters the jiwa, what a man receives from the woman, and vice-versa. So that while the material forces only affect the thinking, and the vegetable forces only affect the feeling of man, that is the feeling of the body, the animal forces go deeper than that to within the white blood of man's body; or in other words, to man's inner heart, what is called the "hati nurani".

But the human forces go straight to the jiwa. So that a man who behaves in the way that Bapak has described is completely lost, because his jiwa is filled with more and more dirt, or different kinds of influences; so that his jiwa, let us say, which started on the human level, it sinks and sinks and sinks; until finally, he gets the Jiwa of an animal, and next the jiwa of a vegetable; and finally, the jiwa of a material object, maybe a table, and after that, the jiwa of a floor tile, and finally the jiwa of a stone.

So through this behavior, through this temptation, his jiwa can sink from the human level back to a material object, so he becomes a material object. And this is why, in fact you must be aware, that women who are let's say, prostitutes, are forbidden by religion. In other words, women are forbidden by religion to act like that, and this is indeed something that we can also experience and know in Subud. But Subud is the one way that things which are ruined, can still be put right, that things that have had it, can still become alive again.

So, it is clear brothers and sisters, that the material forces within man have a very important part to play in his life; and this explanation that Bapak has given is just very brief and a kind of summary. If you want to understand more about this, then you should buy yourself a copy of Bapak's book called Susila Budhi Dharma, which no doubt you will see it has been published recently and has Bapak's name on it. But just because you see Bapak's name on it, you mustn’t then get the idea that all of you must ask Bapak to sign your copy, because Bapak hasn't time to sign so many copies of his book.

Wendhausen, Germany - June 23, 1976
Concerning testing...
Code Number: 76 WEN 2
So Bapak says the important thing is to mainly stick to things which are really, really necessary. In the latihan you receive all sorts of secrets about other people and in the latihan we understand about each other, so this is like a secret. In other words the latihan is full of secrets of life, Bapak says. But if I know your secrets and then I tell it to somebody else, that is like I'm slandering you or I am giving away your secrets. This is what is not allowed so therefore you should be very careful about other people, especially when they don't ask you to test.

Then Bapak said: testing is good, as long as it is not unnecessary, because it answers certain questions. The nature of the questions, which are usually easy to answer are practical things, but the testing Bapak does with us in his talks and in the latihan, Bapak does this as an example or to give us some experience; but Bapak sees that it is not yet time for us to imitate them or duplicate Bapak’s testing. We are not ready for it yet. But what is useful for us is when there are practical problems which need to and which cannot be answered in usual way, that is necessary to test and there is nothing wrong with it. Even then, whether the answer is right or not right is a question, but then if we are not influenced the chances that the answer is right are high, but if we are influenced not. And this experience has happened very often, for example: somebody loves a girl very much, so when ever he tests, whether this girl is the one he should marry the answer will be yes, yes this will be the one, this is the right partner. So then he goes to the helper and he says to the helper : look I am in love with her and so on, can you check in a test whether this is my right partner, and unconsciously the helper is influenced by the feeling of this man. He also, when he tests, receives yes, whereas in fact, the reality is that the girl may even have not seen the man even, so this goes wrong.

This has happened many, many times in Subud. For example this story about this Subud member who has been married for fourteen years already and he receives that his wife is not his right partner in other words he should divorce her and marry a girl who he was very much in love with, a Swiss girl. And every time he tested about it, he received yes, it is right and when he tested it with helpers, they also received yes it is his right partner; so he should divorce his wife. And then he asked Bapak and Bapak said: just a minute, if your wife was the wrong partner why did you marry her fourteen years ago, you must have realized this long ago already and if you have already been married with her for fourteen years you must take the responsibility and also don't forget that God can repair something that cannot be repaired, but God can fit together two things which don't fit.

So therefore you have to take responsibility for your marriage and just go on with it. But luckily in this case of course he had no children, but still Bapak says you have to be responsible and actually this girl in Switzerland, she's not very interested in him, although he had been madly in love with her for ten years or so. And by chance he actually had to come to Switzerland when Bapak was there and met this girl. And then actually they met and she told him right in his face I'm not very interested and I never have dreamed to be your wife and in fact I'm not very keen of it. So then he was very surprised and then he came to Bapak and Bapak said: so you know for yourself now; Bapak said it is the truth. So in this case it is very easy to become influenced and receive something that is incorrect.

Cilandak, Indonesia - July 25, 1976
Code Number: 76 CDK 6
Human beings wouldn't recognize food, nor would they be able to nourish their flesh and blood and the rest of their physical bodies, if they were not assisted by the low forces of vegetation, called roh nabadi. Human beings would have no zest, no courage, no will to make progress, for example, unless they were helped by the animal forces. And people wouldn't realize what it is to be kind, to be honorable, to have a wide ranging mind, unless helped by the ordinary human forces, the jasmaniah forces.

And where do people get these jasmaniah forces whereby they help one another? From marriage. For that reason it's very necessary and important for people to marry. Yes, Bapak isn't hinting at his grand-daughters who also are not yet married, but they are mindful of that. They mustn't feel that the comfortable thing is to stay with their grandfather. That they mustn't do.

Yes, of course, it's hard for a woman who has a husband. That's why every time Bapak gives advice to newly married couples he always says marriage is a difficult test. Marriage is indeed a trial, a test, for human beings, to enable them to begin to be conscious of the life of someone other than themselves. Before they marry, people have only to think of themselves, haven't they? If they feel like going to the cinema, they go there. If they feel like eating sate ( small pieces of meat roasted on skewers ), they eat it. But once they have a wife it's different.

The wife wants to eat lempeng ( a kind of cake ), the husband sate. Now they share, half sate, half lempeng. Then they have a child, so now there are three of them, and their shares have to be still further divided.

Brothers and sisters, you are certainly able to feel this. When you go into a shop where there are a lot of toys, won't you have to buy one of the things hanging there? Oh yes, you'll buy that. Why buy it, what's the reason, what's the need? 'It's for my child.' That's how it is. Well, if you're single it's different: your interest is in women.

For that reason, being a teacher is difficult. A teacher asks his pupils 'Now children, what do you enjoy doing?' 'What do you like, sir?' 'Oh that's a different matter. Don't do what I do, I get my pleasure in other ways.' The children enjoy balloons, the teacher doesn't. One has to be able to make the distinction. So when someone is school teaching he needs to understand pedagogy, the principles of teaching children, the principles of life, to inform himself about the nature of children.

Cilandak, Indonesia - August 15, 1976
Code Number: 76 CDK 7
When he reaches the end of his life, the material force comes pressing him to repay his debt. 'Hey, man, what are you getting ready for?' 'Oh, I'm getting ready because God is going to call me back to the high and noble place I came from'. 'Oh, that's very nice. You couldn't have lived well, had a family, had a big house, and moreover you as a man could not have had more than one wife but for me; you could not possibly have had them. Women admired you because of me, for your tie and your nice clothes'. 'Is that so?' 'Yes.' 'Well, then?' 'I'll stop you from going back to the place you came from.'

Besides, it is not just that, brothers and sisters. Human beings could not lead their earthly lives, or you could not lead your earthly lives without the help of the force of plant life. You could not and it is not possible, for the plant life you fill yourself with enables you to become strong, to have flesh, blood, bones and so on.

And not only that. There is yet another, the animal life force. That is established in the human self. This is the fact of it, unless God decreed that you should be in this world in non-human form not needing flesh, blood, bones and so on, so that you could be free of all that. But you cannot be free of it. You appear as really complete human beings because of the help of the low forces just mentioned.

These forces also, when you reach the end of your life, will press for repayment from you. 'Hey, man, what are you getting ready for?' 'God is going to call me back home'. 'Oh, that's very nice for you, but have you forgotten who made it possible for you to eat? What did you eat?' 'Well?' I’ll prevent you returning home. You must repay me for my past services to you. Being the foremost of creatures, you can certainly repay me'. Then you become worried and confused. That is the death agony.

That is not yet all, brothers and sisters. There is still another. While you are still confused and bewildered there comes yet another: the jasmaniah or ordinary human life force. If you are a man, it will be a woman; if you are a woman, it will be a man. 'Hey, where are you off to?' 'I'm going back.' 'Back where? To Paras Baru ( a market in Jakarta ) ?' 'No, I want to go back to where I first came from, to the best of worlds.' 'Well, that's nice for you. You've been able to enjoy yourself, to do this, to do that, even to worship God, because of me. Yes, and because of me you had children. You've just been enjoying yourself.' That is just the one; for those who have just one wife. 'Well, then?' 'Oh, come back. You can't leave me. I don't want to be left, I'm going with you.' 'You can't. There's only one hole ( grave ). You can't come.' 'Too bad. You stay out and I'll be in the hole.' 'Oh dear,' he says, 'this'll be the death of me.'

While he is thinking this over, another comes along. 'Well, who are you?' 'I'm your second wife.' 'Oh for goodness sake!' Before he has thought that over, another comes: 'I'm your third wife.' Then another comes: 'I'm your fourth wife.' Another comes along: 'I'm your unofficial wife.'

That, brothers and sisters, is why religion forbids people to do wrong. That is called the torment of the grave.

Plainly then, brothers and sisters, the latihan kejiwaan of Subud is full of truths being made clear, that you do not yet understand, are not yet aware of. Don't let little things lead to quarrels. Don't let little things cause dissension. That is just as though you were young chicks: when left by the mother hen they start scrapping. How and when will you be able to be quiet, be able to be peaceful? When will it be? Do you see?

Cilandak, Indonesia - October 6, 1976
Talk given at the wedding reception
Code Number : 76 CDK 14
Harmony means not trying to win or to come out on top. No; if you know that someone else has a lot of work to do, take over some of it; offer to help. But if you yourself have a lot of work and someone else has nothing to do, then you ask him or her to help you. That way it is equal shares, not just in work, but in every kind of thing, so that in this way we in the spiritual brotherhood of Subud are not only harmonious amongst ourselves in the external affairs of this world, but we shall also be like that in the hereafter as well.

That is why in the old days people used to say that anyone who had a guru, a teacher, and who attended a school was closer to the teacher than to his own blood brothers. But in reality that is not so. How can it be? It cannot. That is all imagination and it cannot be so.

The idea that you are able to be brotherly, able to be harmonious, is merely imagination, merely from your will, but in actual reality it is not so. That is the fact of the matter. Even more so later on after you die. While you are still alive and when you are merely sleeping, then even though you and your wife are sharing one pillow, both sleeping on the same pillow, sometimes even still holding one another in your arms, yet once you go to sleep one of you may go to Europe and the other to the South Pole. It can just be like that. Supposing that in your sleep one of you were taken to one place and the other to another, you would suddenly wake up and say "Where is my wife?" "What have you been doing?" "Sleeping." Well that is how it is when you are merely asleep. So how much the more will it be so when you are dead. That is why you should not talk about "My dear wife whom I shall love for ever in this world and the next." Yes, how can you be sure whether that is true or not?

This can be proved, and Bapak has had some small proof of it. When Bapak is in bed, the door of his room is here ( gesture ). When I want to go to sleep, I shut the door, but do not lock it. But whenever my wife here ( Bapak indicates Ibu Mastuti ) comes through into the room and opens the door, my eyes open. Well, why is that? The door is opened; why is that? It is because when Bapak goes to sleep the door is one with Bapak’s eyes. That is how it is. That must be how it is.

Both are made one. Then how does it go on? I close these ( eyes ), but that ( door ) is open. If my wife comes through that open door, I merely blink, but go on sleeping. Well, that is a small practical instance, brothers and sisters. But it is not the same for you, whose practical experience is different. Yes; you may blink just the same, but your blinking is different from mine. What you are blinking at is different.

Cilandak, Indonesia - February 23, 1977
Talk on the occasion of the engagement between Robijan Jones and Halimah Hampe.
Code Number : 77 CDK 3
Brothers and sisters, and especially the engaged couple, that’s why Bapak explains that you should really get to know and really examine the situation between you during the engagement period and before any formal marriage has taken place, in order that in days to come, after you are married and have become husband and wife, after your wedding, no feeling of disappointment will arise, or any feeling of anything being out of place or out of balance. Thus it is necessary to examine the situation beforehand, so that eventually you will really bring yourselves something that will cause your lives to be happy.

That is how it is, brothers and sisters, and my children who are getting engaged; marriage is in reality not something for pleasure, but it is like a test in the life of human beings. For in marriage, even though it is said that a man ought to have a wife to form a balance in what he does in life, yet In fact he is actually bringing an antagonist into close proximity with himself. Before he is married he has no opponent, but after he is married he has one. In fact a wife is an energy to a man, to her husband, but the reverse is also true. This wife becomes his best advisor; she becomes his best and most special helper, so that he will attain to perfection both in life in this world and life in the hereafter.

Cilandak, Indonesia - April 15, 1977
Talk given at wedding Reception for : Syamsu Usman and Haryanti Neves.
Code Number : 77 CDK 5
As Bapak said just now, marriage is like a test, it is like a training for those who marry, so that they can know and understand what it is like to live with a companion after having lived by oneself. That is why a wife really is like a companion, a comrade in the test. By being able to know how it feels to live in marriage, they will then be able to feel what is needed in their lives. If they are lucky, they will be able to know this, so that the conditions they experience will always be apparent in their lives.

This is why marriage is important, brothers and sisters, this is why marriage is necessary. Indeed, brothers and sisters, in the ordinary way, marriage is a pleasure, so that many people do not think about it or train themselves to feel that married life is a time or period of life in which they can see how their lives will subsequently be.

For that reason and chiefly to shorten the time ( of Bapak’s talk ) our grandchildren Syamsu and Haryanati, who is now his wife, should sincerely do as Bapak has said and intertwine their lives with their worship of the One Almighty God. For it is through their diligence in carrying out their training in life and through the grace of the One Almighty God that the marriage between my grandchildren will be protected from all harm and from all temptation, so that they will always be safe and happy and will lack for nothing.

Cilandak, Indonesia - June 12, 1977
The roh jasmani or human life force; this human body is jasmani.
Code Number : 77 CDK 8
Does one eat people? No; not that. What is the opposite? It is the difference between men and women. Thus it is said to be in the union of man with woman or of woman with man that the influence of the jasmani life force is manifested. So people say that if one wants to become strong and to have power, to become perfect, so that one can know this and that, just like God, then one should not marry. They say that you should not marry; not that you must not go near women, but that you must not marry. But if you like having women around, all right. You must not marry but you can have women in your life. That is just the same thing, or what is called, 'Setali tiga uang' ( a quarter of a rupiah is the same as twenty-five cents ).

Thus this force also becomes an obstacle. True; for men to be near women or for women to be near men, for a man to have a wife or for a woman to have a husband, also becomes an obstacle in life to their worship of God if it is made into one. But it is not the will of God that it should be one. It should be a help to you, and help you to make an upward leap. Happiness indeed comes through your union with a woman or, if you are a woman, it comes through your union with a man; that is, you have a child. Who does not feel their life is happy when they have a child?

That is why children are said to be like kencana wingko. Kencana wingko means a stone seems like gold. Even if the child is an ugly one, you would not want to exchange it for another. If someone were to say, 'I will give you my handsome child in exchange,' you would not want it: 'Let it alone, it may not be perfect, but this is my child.'

Then, brothers and sisters, once the power of God has protected your inner nature from the material, vegetable, animal and ordinary human influences, then, as Bapak always says, it is God alone who can repair all the things that are out of order, and only He who can put right everything that is wrong. Only God can do this, for God is above all things, however high. That is why Bapak says that God is above everything that is above, God precedes all beginnings and exists after all endings. And He is within or more inward than whatever is inside and He is also outside and beyond whatever is outside.

London, England - June 20, 1977
Code Number : 77 LON 1
The jasmaniah life force is the human life force. How do human beings influence one another? In the case of plants, they are obviously eaten, and animals too are obviously eaten. But what if it is another human being? Human beings influence one another through the existence of two sexes; male and female, man and woman. Thus the union of a man and a woman forms a true human being; manusia. Bapak is not saying that someone who is still single is half a person; no, but a person who is still single, not yet married, is an ordinary human being, not yet able to feel the perfection of the true human being. Even when people are married, but do not yet have a child, they cannot yet be called perfect, because they are not yet what is called tritunggal, three in one; a trinity of karso ( will ), roso ( inner feeling ) and kenyataan ( result ). That is why the child that arises from its two parents shows the nature of their union. That is why when and if people are harmoniously married, if they are in agreement, though of course, they will sometimes disagree in the course of their lives, if they are harmonious in their lives they will give rise to children who are truly the children of a real union, the children of two parents who have become one. That forms the tritunggal, three in one.

That is how the jasmani influences the human self. But even though to live as a wife or a husband may be to live on the level of a perfect human being, yet they are a very great hindrance to one another. For when one is facing death, this is very heavy for human beings; it is not like a wife facing her husband or a husband facing his wife. How is it for people when they are facing death? They are then standing in the presence of God, when they can know the One Almighty God Who created them. How will it be then?

Edinburgh, Scotland - July 1, 1977
Code Number : 77 EDI 1
Before, when a man was single, he could do anything he liked. He could go anywhere he wanted, and he didn't have to consult anybody. But once he is married, he has always to take his wife into account, and his wife can overturn all his plans. And vice versa. The wife has to take her husband into account. So it is truly a burden for man - and yet it is something also that is the completion of man's life, because through the action of the human forces between the husband and wife, there can be formed a new being who is called a child, and this child will exhibit the natures of the two parents; that is, the characteristics of the two parents. This shows, then, the power of the human forces - that they are able to create a new being which is a reflection of the two parents. And the child born from parents who are truly harmonious in their marriage, who are truly peaceful in their lives and who are never far from the worship of God, will be a child whose character is described in Islam as a child who will truly give help and assistance and be an example to anyone who needs it, who will always be an asset to society, and who will always be a joy to his parents, raising them up both outwardly and inwardly spiritually in a direction of a complete life and a cleanness of the inner feeling. Such is a child that all people always hope for as a result of their marriage.

Rotterdam, Holland - July 15, 1977
Code Number : 77 RTM 4
If we compare that to the situation of a human being - the master, the husband, is God Almighty, is the power of God. And we, the human being, symbolize the wife, the wife who arranges the household, who does everything.

Why is it that we compare the husband or a man to God and not a wife? This is because the nature of man and woman is actually different. If we examine the relationship of man and woman, the one who is the source of the child, the one who is the origin for the birth of the child, is the father. So the father is the one, as it were, who is analogous to God, the one who is able to create or who is the source - while the wife is the one who receives the child and, let us say, looks after it and organizes it so that it can become a human being. This is, then, the true relationship of man and woman, and this is also why in the Bible and in the Koran God is always talking about men. God rarely refers to women in, for example, the Bible or in the Koran, and sometimes women feel very offended about this and they complain and say: 'How is this, why does God ignore women? Is it because we are not human beings?' This is completely untrue and is a complete misunderstanding. It is simply that the wife is like an assistant. So this the household, then, can be used to symbolize the situation of man. But a complete household is a household with servants. Actually, the household you have here, or in the United States, is no longer a symbol of the truth any more - because the housewife has to do everything herself; because if she decided to have servants she would have to pay them the same salary as her husband gets at his job. So we can no longer use the analogy here.

But the fact is that in a complete household, a family that is complete, there should be the father and the mother; and the mother's work should be done by the servants, so that there is father, mother and servants. As with us, there is the power of God, we ourselves, and then all the lower forces who do our work. So that, actually, the whole thing works as a unit, or as a team - and not like it's the housewife who has to go out and buy firewood, and it's the housewife who has to do the cleaning, and it's the housewife who has to do the shopping and the cooking and everything.

This, then, gives you an illustration of how our situation should be at the moment when we are doing our enterprises, so that at every moment we are aware of the guidance of the power of God Almighty - and we never forget about it, no matter what we are doing, no matter what we are working at. This is the reason why Bapak always reminds you and always advises you to do enterprises in the same way that we receive the Latihan Kejiwaan.

Bapak would like to tell you another story to strengthen, as it were, your faith and your confidence in the Latihan Kejiwaan. Bapak once got a letter, not long ago, from Japan, telling a story of an experience of one of the brothers in Japan. There was a Subud member in Japan, some time before, who felt that he was going to die soon, and he talked to a friend of his who was also a Subud member, and said to him: 'Look, I have a feeling I am going to die in the near future - so would you remember that if I die, you look after my wife and try to find her a job, because she has just given birth to a child, and she will certainly need some help when I'm gone?'

So the friend said: 'Okay' and forgot all about it.

True enough, about three months later the first member died, and as normal when people die he was buried or something, and the other member went on and forgot completely that he should do something for the wife. Again a few months passed, and this member who was still alive was going to the latihan as usual. He was late, so he was the last one to go in. As he was going into the hall someone stopped him, someone took his arm - and he turned round and saw this brother who had died. But for some reason, at that moment, he forgot - he forgot that this brother had died, and he felt as though, yes, he was just there. So he said: 'Come, let's go and do latihan together.' But this second brother said: 'No, no, I want to talk to you for a moment, can you come out a moment?'

'All right.'

'Do you remember some months ago I asked you to help my wife because she really needs help. She has a very young child and she needs a job - that you can give her a job, or maybe you can find her a job. Did you do anything about it?'

'No, no, you're quite right, I completely forgot about it.'

'O.K. - now this time will you be sure to remember?'

'Yes, now I will do something about it.' Then he added: 'Come on, let's do latihan.'

So this brother said: 'All right, goodbye', and went into the latihan. And as he started to do latihan, he suddenly remembered: 'My God, that brother was actually the one who died three months ago.'

He was so startled by this experience that he immediately left the latihan and went to See the dead brother's wife. And when he arrived at her apartment he said:

'Have you met your husband since he died?'

And she replied: 'What are you talking about, how can I meet my husband after he has died?'

Sure enough, of course, he had died. There was no sign of him in the flat. And so he said: 'Well, it's funny you should say that because, actually, I just met him just now.'

And then he told her the whole story: 'Well, it's true. He asked me to help you, and now I will do what he asks. First of all, I happen to have some money - here is some if you need .it and I will now find a job for you.'

This having happened, this brother then wrote a letter to Bapak and asked: 'Is this really true? Is this experience something real, or did I dream it? But if I dreamt it, it's also not possible because I wasn't asleep - I was just going to the latihan?' So Bapak wrote back to him: 'Don't worry, this is really the truth, and this is also a proof or a reminder for you that the Latihan Kejiwaan is something that is really full of content.'

So this brother in Japan who died, did not die in the way that most people die. For us, it is also a reminder that the Latihan Kejiwaan is something very significant, full of content and full of reality and proof.

Oslo, Norway - July 24, 1977
Code Number : 77 OSL 4
To take another example - which Bapak tested with you yesterday, those of you who were there yesterday morning - when a man sees a woman and he likes her, and you ask him: 'Do you really like this woman?'

He says: 'Yes I do'.

'Who likes this woman? Is it really you?'

'Yes, it is I - human being.'

Or let us say he is called Henry. So he says: 'Yes, I Henry, human being, like this woman.'

But again, as you experienced yesterday when Bapak tested with you, it is not sure that at that moment it is truly the human self. For example, you then ask Henry:

'Do you really like this woman?' Or as we say nowadays: 'Have you really fallen in love with this woman so that your love is really strong and firm, and so that you really want to be one with her and share your life with her?'

At that moment, certainly, because Henry is still influenced, he will say: 'Yes, it is sure, it is quite sure.'

But the trouble is that if they then get married it may well turn out that what influenced him at that moment was not his real human jiwa, but still the jiwa of the animal forces, or it could even be the material forces. So that this love, this eternal love, turns out to be the love of one night, or the love of a candle, as one says, so it is very quick to disappear.

Now when people experience this - and this happens also among us -that after several years of being married, suddenly a husband and wife feel that because originally they are not attracted by the human force but by another force, their love cannot really make them one. Suddenly they feel unsuitable, or unsuited to each other, and then there is a temptation to finish with it, to give up the whole business and try again. But this is not right, because they have already children and they have been married for a long time probably. Yes, sure it was a mistake. They made a mistake when they got married, but now as human beings they must show themselves true to their promise as a human being, as a noble creature, to carry through their mistake and to struggle to put right the mistake which they made. And how can we struggle in this situation? We can only struggle with God Almighty. So that, actually, the way then is to surrender this to God Almighty, and to continue with our Latihan Kejiwaan so that gradually the mistake that we have made can be put right.

Now Bapak addresses his words specifically to those of you who have not yet got married. It is very important for you really to pay attention to your Latihan Kejiwaan. Always in your seeing, your smelling, your -~ tasting, your feeling, always stick close to the influence of God Almighty, so that you can begin to distinguish more and more between the different kinds of forces which influence you when you see, when you hear, when you smell, and so on, and also when you feel. So that when the time comes for you to get married you will not make a mistake, like others have done before you. You also have to struggle. Those who have made the mistake and now are married, they have to struggle, through the Latihan Kejiwaan, to correct that mistake and to make it right. But those who have not yet got married must also struggle to make sure that when the time comes they will not make a mistake, because they are already aware of being able to make the right choice.

So, Brothers and Sisters, it is clear that this Latihan Kejiwaan is something that is very, very useful and a great support for our life in this world.

Wendhausen, Germany - July 29, 1977
Code Number : 77 WEN 1
This is actually what is important, brothers and sisters. This is the secret of life. For all of you who have husbands or wives, then in fulfilling your obligations as human beings - that is, in intercourse between man and woman - then every time you do this, and every time a man has intercourse with his wife, or a wife with her husband, you must not let go of your worship of the One Almighty God. The content of your inner-feeling should be one of "God, God, forgive me all my sins, and forgive me all my faults and mistakes." This can be felt; eventually you will be able to feel and to understand what are the uses and benefits of the union between man and woman; of husband with wife and of wife with husband. Yes, that is what is most important.

Barcelona, Spain - August 27, 1977
Code Number : 77 BCN 2
So it is important for us to understand that this is a secret for us, that we can know, that it is through this that we can experience - that what is meant by worship of God, by the words 'worship of God' for man is, in fact, the union of man and woman.

Therefore, we cannot criticize or we cannot blame a man if he needs a woman, or a woman if she needs a man. Only what is very important is that at the moment of union, we must approach it without leaving aside or letting go of our feeling, the feeling of our own being, which is submitted to God Almighty and which remembers and worships God Almighty. Then this union of man and woman will become for us - will bring us closer to God Almighty. We will experience - very often as though unintentionally, maybe we say something, or we express in some way the greatness of God Almighty, because at that moment the male and the female become one, so there becomes one human being - one human being who worships God Almighty. It is for this reason that, at that moment, the man can become aware of the thinking and the feeling of the woman, and similarly the woman can become aware of the wishes and the needs of the man. So it will be that at that moment we can receive a real understanding and knowledge from the power of God Almighty, exactly as we can when we are doing our Latihan Kejiwaan. This is why, in the latihan - if we do our latihan and we can become truly quiet so that we remember nothing except the power of God Almighty, and are not influenced or disturbed by anything else - we receive a feeling which is a bliss that has no comparison, and is in no way less than that which we experience at the moment of union with our husbands or our wives.

It is true that what Bapak is talking about is what is usually referred to nowadays as sex, but this fact - that is, the union of man and woman - is actually the basis or the most important thing in the life of man, because it is the cause or the motive for a man to work hard. In other words, the thing that makes a man willing to work hard in life, and to wish to achieve something in life, is his wife. And through his wife he will receive children. So it is clear that the fundamental or the foundation of man's life in this world is the union between man and woman. A man will not strive to achieve in life unless because of the needs of his wife and his family. That is the reason why, in religion, it is very strongly forbidden for a man to have sexual relations with women of bad character, or something like that; and also it is very much forbidden for a man to have relations with a woman other than the woman who is his wife, because if he does that he will not be able to obtain the reality of the union of man and woman, such as Bapak has described.

That is why Bapak advises us Subud members now who have received the Latihan Kejiwaan - from now on, whenever we experience, whenever we have a union with our husbands or wives, that we should, at that moment not bring into it any form of thinking or any problems or anything at all that we have, but rather to put aside completely everything other than just to be aware of the power of God and to be aware of ourselves exactly as when we are doing the Latihan Kejiwaan. If we can do that we will, sooner or later, be able to receive the proof of the reality of the union of the jiwa. That is, as a result of the union, at the moment of the union and afterwards, we will experience a satisfaction which we cannot compare with anything else in this world. From that feeling which we get at the moment of the union of the jiwa, there will arise a true feeling of love between husband and wife, so that they will feel completely united and this will make their life together completely harmonious.

So this is, in fact, the way for us - because who are the people who know heaven? The people who know heaven are the people who ,have been there before. Similarly, a person who knows London or can describe London, is someone who has often visited London. Or an Englishman who knows Paris is someone who has been in Paris often. So someone who knows and understands about the life after death, is someone who has been there before. And the way to follow if we want to know heaven and to be aware of heaven in this world is to practice the union of husband and wife in the way that Bapak has described, because it is through the jiwa that we can get into contact with other jiwas and other levels and other things in this world. That is the meaning of the seven circles that is the symbol of Subud - that is, ,the various levels of the life forces, that is the seven circles. You see that between them ,there are also seven lines connecting these seven circles, and these are ,the lines through which the jiwa can get in contact with and experience everything that exists in this world, and it is through this, it is therefore through the jiwa that .man can receive understanding at that moment, as Bapak said, of the union of husband and wife.

Bemuse this world is a place of trial for man. This world is a place full of suffering, full of danger, full of trials and accidents and difficulties. But .at the center of this life, which is a 'life of suffering and a life of trial for man, there is also a great peace and a great bliss -if we are able to surrender everything at that moment, if we are able to surrender everything to God Almighty and put aside everything else other than our worship of God Almighty. Then in the middle of all this difficulty and all this suffering that exists in this world, we can experience .the life in the next world, that is, heaven.

So it is true to say that the union of man and woman is the most important thing in the life of man, because it is at that moment that man and women can become aware of their relationship and .their worship towards God Almighty; and because this is the foundation of man's life in this world, a great deal of attention is paid in religion to the relationship between man and woman. For example, in Islam, when a man and a woman want to marry they have to go through the wedding ceremony, in which it is essential for both the man and woman to say the creed ~- that is, to say 'I am convinced that there is nothing that deserves to be worshipped except God Almighty.' And they add 'And I believe that the Prophet ',Muhammad was the messenger of God.' And if they do not say this, then the wedding is not legal or not official - and the purpose and reason for this is because in Islam they attach a great importance to the fact that man and woman should always, in their relationship, be aware of and remember the power of God Almighty.

Why then is Bapak thinking about this now? Why is Bapak referring to this fact in talking to you today? Because in the latihan we receive the worship of God as one, in a state of unity - that is, we do not feel male or female, we do not feel man or woman at that moment. And that is why if the latihan were done together between men and women - in other words, if in the latihan men and women were doing latihan together - then if they really followed the latihan they would end up having union between male and female, between man and woman. In other words, having sexual relations. And this is something you are not allowed to check for yourselves if it's true or not. But Bapak does not mind if a husband and wife wish to check it for themselves. Then they will understand how it really is.

And what is very important - because of this fact that we, in the latihan, feel our unity with God, it can happen that in Subud between helpers and between members, but usually more between helpers, there arises a feeling of closeness because of our common worship to God Almighty, there arises a feeling of closeness and close brotherhood between, for example, men helpers and women helpers. Although Bapak has often explained this and has clearly given instructions and has forbidden this sort of thing, yet it still frequently happens that, for example, in his latihan, a man will receive a feeling that so-and-so, his girl friend or his woman acquaintance, another Subud member, is his real wife or is his real partner. And maybe she also receives the same thing in the latihan - but the ,trouble is that she may be already married to someone else. This is something ,that is very dangerous, and that is why Bapak has ,to speak about it very clearly, because Bapak reminds you again that the thing that penetrates everywhere and can. become one with everything is the jiwa - but the physical body is something that is local, is just here, and cannot go everywhere and be everywhere and be in contact with everything. So what is possible for the jiwa is not possible for the physical body. So what is experienced by the jiwa, it is not necessary for the body always to follow that.

That is why in religion there are rules made and very clear rules laid down about the relationship between men and women, so that if a man wants to marry a woman then he has to go through a certain ceremony, and only if he has gone through that ceremony are they allowed to live together and so on.

This is why Bapak wants to warn the helpers that you should be aware of this problem and you should be able to give advice to members so that there is not confusion and difficulties and problems arising as a result of a lack of understanding of this. Because if there were not these rules and these regulations that, for example, exist in religion, our life would be completely chaotic, and it is only through ,this that human life can achieve a true morality and a correct organization.

Woodstock, VT USA - September 13, 1977
Code Number : 77 WOS 2
In Islam it is said that man has to worship God five times a day. But it is also said that if someone in Islam wants to get closer to God, wants really to become aware of the power of God and really worship God in a way that is more than usual, then in addition to saying prayers five times a day, he should recite continuously certain prayers. This is what you see with Muslim elders and so on; they carry a kind of string of beads, and with this they count - you can see them doing it, and each time they count the beads they say a certain prayer. The idea of this is that you are praying all the time, you never cease to pray. But this is still something wrong; this is still something topsy-turvy because it is something you are forcing, which is not natural. It means, for example, you are saying 'La ilaha ilo la, La ilaha ilo la', and then you want a drink. While you are doing this you are reaching for your drink. You still keep going 'La ilaha ilo la' - but the moment you are drinking you have to stop ( laughter ). Or, for example, you are going 'La ilaha ilo la' and then, suddenly, on television there is a singer singing a beautiful melody. Suddenly your 'La ilaha ilo la' stops ( laughter ). Or there is a very pretty woman and you are saying 'La ilaha ilo la' and, suddenly you see her, and . . . ( laughter ). So it is something that is still wrong. This teaching is something that is not practical - it's made up.

It's different in the case of what we have received in the Latihan Kejiwaan, because with us our worship of God Almighty can be there all the time - while we are drinking, while we are listening to the singer on the television, while we see a pretty girl, if we happen to be a man. And this is something that you can experience. For example, Bapak. If Bapak sees a woman who is pretty - because that woman is no use to Bapak because she's not Bapak's wife ( laughter ) and she's the wife of somebody else, so Bapak's eyes automatically turn away. It's not because Bapak wants to, but because the power of God is already contained, is one with Bapak's seeing. And this is something you can experience yourself. If you are married, a wife need no longer concern herself about her husband, about what her husband will do when she's not looking, because there will be within him the power of God's will - it will be done for him by the power of God, that his behavior will be arranged and will be limited by the power of God Almighty to what is right and what is proper for him, providing they both do the Latihan Kejiwaan sincerely.

Montreal, Canada - September 17, 1977
Code Number : 77 YUL 2
Bapak would like to talk to you, tell you briefly, about the history of life: That it was God's Will to create human beings in this world, and in order to be able to live here they were given a framework, or a complement of assistants, or accessories, such as we have ourselves. This is illustrated in the story of Adam. Before Adam was created and was sent to this world by God Almighty, Adam existed in heaven. And Adam in that state could do whatever he wished, just like that - just by wanting it, he could have anything that he wished. But God Almighty called Adam and said:

"It is my Will that you should go down into this world, and when you are in this world your state will no longer be like you are now, because you will have a whole framework and a whole series of needs and requirements to fulfil your life in this world. In order to be able to live there I will have to give you all sorts of assistants and accessories which are the lower forces."

These lower forces were, first of all, the material forces: Because in order to live in this world Adam had to have a physical body, and it would have been impossible for him to have this physical body unless he had been given the material forces. It was with these material forces that he was able to create things in this world which enabled his physical body to survive here.
Read the complete talk here

Rio de Janeiro, Brazil - October 14, 1977
Code Number : 77 RIO 1
So Adam, besides being ordained to possess mind and heart and the five senses, was also equipped with these life-forces; that was the material, vegetable, animal and ordinary human life-forces. Whereas in fact, brothers and sisters, the material life force actually constitutes an obstacle for human beings, an obstacle for you, so that it can be said to be impossible for you to worship the One Almighty God perfectly so long as you are still influenced by the material life-force, yet that material life force, brothers and sisters, forms your equipment for life. That means that when you eat it takes part in eating, when you see, it takes part in the seeing, when you smell something it takes part in the smelling, and when you speak it takes part in the speaking. It also takes part in tasting the food you eat. It joins in all those things, so that if you have a false attitude towards life, it will actually be the lower forces which will enjoy the results of your actions, For instance, you may see something beautiful, something you call beautiful, but sometimes only five per cent of your pleasure in it is for you and ninety-five percent is for the material force. That is how it is, and later on Bapak will explain more about it.

After it had been decreed that Adam should possess a mind and a heart, he was also provided with all the life forces which were to form his equipment for life, and then God in His wisdom also gave a promise to Adam.

"Adam, you must have no fears or doubts when I send you down to earth as a human being, for your framework is enough for you to live there, and I, with My greatness and My power, shall always protect you and watch over you, and I shall always guide you and direct you. You will be able to receive something from the One Almighty Cod, and you must not doubt or worry."

So Adam was sent down from heaven and once he was in this world he had a human form, he is pictured as a naked man.
Read the complete talk here

Rio de Janeiro, Brazil - October 18, 1977
Code Number : 77 RIO 3
The heart always wants to achieve quickly; in other words, to work a little and already have much success; to work a little and already be rich; to work a little and already be promoted and become a very important person, or a wise person, and so on. Even though you are not yet able - the heart has this wish. But it is not able to count or to measure your ability, your strength - whether you are able to do that or not yet, the heart cannot know. It just wants to make progress, but it has no idea whether you are able to make progress or not. It is natural that the heart should be like this, because the heart is always influenced by the lower forces. This is what Bapak has explained to you before, that all these lower forces, the material forces, the vegetable, the animal and the human - they are part of our being. So that when we look, these lower forces look with us. When we smell, these lower forces smell with us. When we listen, then they listen with us, and when we speak, they also speak with us. But what is more important is when we make love - when the husband and the wife come together. When the husband unites with the wife, we think that we are doing this, but actually the lower forces join in there also, and it's quite wrong to think that they do not. Very often, in fact, they push aside the master, the person himself, and they are the ones who work at that moment.

It is clear then, it is very easy to understand, that the state of man comes to a point where he is completely deformed, and completely burdened with sins and mistakes - and a whole history of sins and mistakes - which form a really difficult situation to clean up. This is why we will gradually understand, through doing the Latihan, that actually it is only the power of God Almighty that can have any hope of correcting any mistake or any sin or anything wrong within man.

If you hear this explanation of Bapak's, you may think to yourself: 'If that is the case, then the people who live in the jungles must be very pure - they must be very clean because they don't make things yet, they are still very primitive.'

Actually, the opposite is true - those people are even worse because their being has already come down to a state of being like a stone - completely dead. Because there is no life within them, there is no understanding. Their human nature is completely atrophied. Because it is actually God's Will that man should be alive, that everything within man should be alive - his understanding, his feeling, his physical body, everything.

Cali, Columbia - November 12, 1977
Code Number : 77 CLO 3
Brothers and Sisters, there is a story from the Muslim religion which Bapak would like to tell you - maybe there is a similar story in Christianity, Bapak doesn't know. For example, this story is that one day the Prophet Muhammad was invited to a big reception by a king. This was natural because Prophet Muhammad was considered higher than a king, and because the invitation was to a big reception, naturally, it wasn't just Prophet Muhammad who was invited, but also his wife. So when they received this invitation, Prophet Muhammad's wife said to him, something like this:

'My husband' - or something like that -

'Here we are being invited to this big reception which will be attended by kings and princesses and wealthy people, and it is sure that they will all be wearing beautiful clothes and all sorts of precious ornaments in order to make themselves look good. But how about me? I am the wife of a Prophet, and the life of a Prophet is not like that, because the life of a Prophet is like the earth which receives rain - sometimes it receives rain and sometimes it does not. So I do not have anything to wear that can correspond to what these people will have.'

So Prophet Muhammad replied to her:

'Wife, it is not necessary for you to worry about that, as long as you surrender to God and worship God Almighty. So just wear whatever you have, so long as it is clean and you are clean.' She said: 'You mean I can go just wearing whatever I happen to have?' And Prophet Muhammad said: 'Yes, certainly.'

On the day of the reception there were already assembled many, many kings and princesses - and the ladies were wearing, of course, very beautiful clothes, full of diamonds and emeralds and all sorts of precious stones. And then came in last Prophet Muhammad with his wife - who wore nothing special - just ordinary everyday clothes, And yet, when all the princesses turned and looked at the wife of Prophet Muhammad, they were transfixed and stupefied to see that she was wearing the most beautiful jewelry that they had ever seen, which completely covered her from head to feet. They were so amazed that they asked their husbands: 'Find out where she obtained that fabulous jewelry.' So their husbands then asked Prophet Muhammad, and he replied to them: 'No, actually, my wife and I are not wearing anything out of the ordinary, but the beauty that you can see is from the fact that she worships God Almighty.' At that moment, when they heard that reply, all the princesses bowed down before her. So, Brothers and Sisters, it is clear that it is the will of God that man should be beautifully dressed. Of course, for someone who has nothing, it is enough just to be clean; but in fact, for those who have, it is God's will that we should be well dressed because the way we dress - what we wear - is a reflection of a heart that is good and clean, because there is a close connection between the outer and the inner. If we are clean outwardly, we will also be clean inwardly. It is really God's will that we should look after our outward appearance. So if you wish to be in a state which is irreproachable both outwardly and inwardly, the way is to do the Latihan Kejiwaan.

Mexico City, Mexico - November 22, 1977
Code Number : 77 MEX 3
Finally, man also has the animal forces and the human forces - again, without which he could not live in this world. For example, if Adam had not been given Eve there would have been no more human beings. After Adam died the world would have been empty again. Woman, who symbolizes the human forces, is indeed for man the ultimate happiness in this world - because there is no happiness greater in this world than that of a man when he has got a woman. Indeed, a woman is for man the symbol or the essence of this world. Bapak is not trying to deprecate women, but a woman is actually the ornament of a man's household. If people judge the wealth or the standing of a man in society, they look at his wife. This is why it is correct and right that women should try to dress as beautifully as possible, and as completely as possible. This is also why, probably, when your wife goes shopping, she spends a long time and brings back a lot of things. When Bapak goes shopping it's very likely that he will go in and out of shops and come home with nothing. But when Bapak's wife goes shopping, she will come back laden with all sorts of things...

Through a woman man can lose his wealth, his position and everything he owns. But also through a woman, if she knows how to accompany her husband correctly, a man can rise up and obtain a high position, great wealth and everything that this world offers.

Through a woman, man can go to heaven or to hell. It depends on whether the woman knows how to accompany her husband according to what is pure and what is right. In short, for man to separate himself from the lower forces, or to put aside the influence of the lower forces, is something completely impossible as long as he lives in this world with a physical body. Because when you try to put aside the lower forces - if you are successful, you end up living without a physical body. And what is it that lives without a physical body? It is a ghost. And a ghost is nothing else than a devil or a satan who lives in the satanic world. It is true that the world is full of beings of this kind - in caves, in great rocks, all over the place there are these ghosts or devils. Indeed, these are beings which you cannot see with the ordinary eyes - but you can see them providing you have the courage not to eat and not sleep for forty days. And people often practice this. They practice this in Indonesia, and in India, in order to be able to see these beings - and maybe here, too, Bapak doesn't know.

Santa Monica, CA USA - November 29, 1977
Code Number : 77 LAX 3
The heart is something that always likes to lie, something that is never constant or faithful. It's always changing, so as long as our worship depends on our heart, it's worthless; as long as anything depends on our heart, it will never be right.

There is a story attached to this. It is said that Adam had two sons. Bapak doesn't remember their names, but they were very, very close to each other, so close that they couldn't bear to be parted. If one was here and the other one was there, one would look for the other until he found him. So that they said to each other:

'How come that we are so close, that we can never be separated from each other? What shall we do about it?'

'Oh, never mind, that's the way it is, so let's just always go everywhere together.'

So they would always walk everywhere hand in hand, and they were only happy in each other's company. Then one day one brother said to the other brother:

'Excuse me for a moment, I have to go and answer nature's call.'

So he went off somewhere in the forest. And while away he lifted up a big stone and underneath saw a great deal of gold. He was terribly happy, and he thought to himself:

'Now I feel really happy. I have found so much gold.'

Then he suddenly thought of his brother:

'Yes, but how will it be? If I show my brother this, then it won't all be for me - he will certainly want some of it.'

So he quickly covered up the gold and went back to his brother and strangled him, so that his brother died. Then he took all the gold for himself. This shows that the heart of man is very easily influenced, and proves that it is subject all the time to whatever is in front of man, whatever is around man.

There is another story about this. Adam had two more children.

( laughter )

But this time it was a boy and a girl. And they loved each other very, very much - well, it was a man and a woman. They walked always hand in hand and arm in arm, and they liked to kiss each other and coddle and so on.

( laughter )

Finally they said to each other:

'This is very tough, because when we walk arm in arm I can't see you. Let's walk face to face'

( laughter )

So they taught themselves to walk face to face - they walked like that, but always facing each other. So as they were walking once, face to face, holding each other like this, suddenly the man over the shoulder of his partner caught sight of another woman - and this woman was very, very beautiful. Suddenly he said to himself:

'Look at that woman, she's so beautiful.'

And then he added:

'What about this one I've got here?'

He quickly took a look at her, this one who was close up - the other one was still further away - and said:

'She's ugly'

( laughter )

All this time the other one was acting kind of coy and smiling and so on, and he thought:

'Yes, I want that one, but how can I get rid of this one first?'

( laughter )

As he was holding her, his arms got higher and higher and higher. Finally his hands were over here - and the next thing he knew he had strangled his sister and she was dead. And then he went off with the other woman .

( laughter )

So, Brothers and Sisters, if we can understand these stories correctly, the heart is something that is completely unreliable. The heart is some-thing that can never be constant or can never stick to the same thing. So for as long as our love, our respect, our worship or anything comes from the heart, it is completely worthless.

For us, it is clear that we have received something where our life need no longer be ruled by our heart, but by something more permanent. Nevertheless, Bapak still constantly gets letters from Subud members who write: 'Bapak I have been married for ten years and I have children, but now I suddenly realize that my wife is not my true partner and I can't stand to live with her any more. I know now what my true partner is like - or I have met someone who is just the right person for me - and I must somehow change my situation and leave my wife - and is this all right?'

( laughter ).

Bapak always answers these people:

'No, because think back - when you first married your wife, did you not love her very, very much? No doubt you even said to her: 'Look, there is nobody in the world but you and me, and I want to live with you for the rest of my life.' As a human being, as a man and as a Subud member - you have to be responsible, you have to have the courage to face the promises and the commitments that you undertook. If you said that you will love your wife till the end, you must now face up to that and take the responsibility for what you have committed yourself. So now you have to go through with it. If you have made a mistake - then all you can do is to pray to God to give you His help, that what was a mistake can be put right, so that it can become something that is right from something that is wrong.'

This, Brothers and Sisters, is the situation, this is the nature of the heart. But we, through the latihan, have received the possibility of relying not on our heart but on our jiwa, because the jiwa with which we have received the contact in this latihan is something that is eternal. It is something that doesn't change and can lead us through life as a constant guide. This is why it is said that someone who has received the contact with the power of God has, at the very least, received a contact with a teacher; for, actually, what man can call teacher is the power of God. It is the power of God that is the teacher of man. This is why Bapak advises you to do enterprises, in order to train yourself, in order to become accustomed to being able to live according to the guidance that is received through contact with the power of God. Through this contact, no matter what you are doing, no matter where you are throughout your life, you will always be close to your teacher - your teacher who will always be able to show you the right action, the right thing to do, the thing that is really right for you in that situation and at that moment.

Marin County, CA USA - December 4, 1977
Code Number : 77 SFO 3
Bapak: Man's illnesses actually arise from man's own actions and from man's own behavior. For example, in the old days what people ate was still relatively simple. If you had a steak, it was made of beef ( laughter ). But today you get a steak which is made of prawns, or you get a steak which is made of dog, or sometimes you get a steak that's made of snake. In other words, people eat all sorts of things, and the result is that they have all sorts of illnesses. So the complexity, the increasing complexity of man's illnesses and problems come about from his own actions, from his own behavior and from what he eats and so on.

Everything goes along with the situation of the times. In those days the situation was like that. Now the situation is different. When Bapak was a young man, in a town maybe you could find 100 doctors. Nowadays in the average sized town there are 100,000 doctors, so there are also more illnesses ( laughter ) because, of course, man's life has become more complex. What he experiences in his everyday life is discovered and is observed by more people - so the doctors are more and more observing more people, whereas before illnesses were usually rather simple. Now, because of man's behavior, as Bapak says, when man eats, maybe he gets served up an alligator, or a mouse or something ( laughter ) and he really doesn't know what it is. As a result his illnesses proliferate; and as a result of more illnesses there are more doctors; and as a result of more doctors, there are also more illnesses ( laughter ), because there are more people to think about his illnesses and discover more illnesses. This is as it should be, because the illnesses that man creates, the illnesses that man experiences as an inevitable result of his way of life, are something that man has to solve himself. In other words, it is right that to cure the illnesses that man experiences nowadays he has no choice but to follow the way of science. In other words, the way of the understanding of the mind; and through science to be able to correct and put right these things that man has experienced. In other words, through medical and other methods.

But what about healing through the kejiwaan? Yes, there is that too. There is healing in the kejiwaan. But what you can heal in the kejiwaan are the illnesses of the kejiwaan - and the illnesses of the kejiwaan are what? The illnesses of the kejiwaan are the illnesses of man's character. So that what can be healed through the kejiwaan is the illness of the jiwa, which is the illness of man's character. And this healing is what we experience in the Latihan Kejiwaan, and the proof of that is within all of you, although maybe you have forgotten it. But if you are able to feel again how you used to be before you joined Subud, then it is almost certain that you will remember that before you joined Subud the slightest thing that happened made you angry, so you can say that you were angry almost all the time, with small intervals. Everything upset you, everything made you angry. Or maybe you used to quarrel with your wife all the time. But as you have done the Latihan Kejiwaan it has become less and less and less and less and less. So that is the proof. That is what Bapak means by the healing of the kejiwaan; it is the healing of the character. But when it comes to illnesses that man creates himself - that is, through his eating, through what he does in his life - that is something that you can only cure through man's ability, through man's intelligence and so on.

An example of this - what can happen to you, the way man can create illnesses and disturbances and so on in his life - is contained in a story that Bapak wants to tell you about a Subud member who lives in Indonesia. His name is Dr. Rachman Mitchell, who happens also to be a medical doctor. Rachman is someone who likes fishing very much, and Bapak always warned him: 'Rachman, you like to fish, but be careful when your wife is pregnant - be careful during that time not to kill any animals, and not to indulge in your hobby of fishing at that time.' But once when his 'wife was pregnant he forgot and went fishing. It seems he caught a fish and the hook of the fishing line got caught in the fish's eye - and it happened that when his wife gave birth to their daughter she had one eye missing, so that the child was complete but had only one eye. Well, she has since then been operated on and a glass eye has been put in so that she can develop normally.

This is an example - but it is an example that doesn't only happen in Indonesia, it happens all the time all over the world. Also here -only people are not aware of it, because they don't realize why that is. For example, women give birth to children who when they are born it is found that they have no brain. It is very strange. Why should a woman give birth to a child who has no brain. Of course, that child will die after a few hours. Still, it comes from actions like that which Bapak has described. But people are still unaware of these things. It's different in Indonesia. People know these things because for many, many years, for centuries, people in Indonesia have been expert in the inner world of man. They can feel things, they are aware of things which in ,the West we are not that aware of. This is why you have to be very, very careful in your life. Especially - and this is really something secret that Bapak is telling you - when you come together with your wife, or when the wife comes together with her husband to have sexual relations, beforehand, and during what you are doing, you must both remember the power of God Almighty, as when you are doing the Latihan Kejiwaan, so that through that Bapak hopes that you will be protected from every kind of danger that could impinge on you. Bapak hopes and prays that as a result of that your children will always be born safe and sound and healthy.

Seattle, WA USA - December 8, 1977
Code Number : 77 SEA 1
Brothers and sisters, there are some of you whose receiving goes smoothly and quickly, and there are some for whom it takes rather a long time, sometimes several years. This also has its reasons. Of course you do not suspect that all of you are like a culmination, a concentration, and that the faults which are present in you have not originated in your own selves but in your ancestors. So it can be said that the faults which exist in you have accumulated there, which means that they have been piling up until they are already like, yes, like an accumulation faults piled upon faults which is, of course, very difficult for you to eliminate, to purify, to break down, except through the power of the One Almighty God or without the power of the One Almighty God. That is why it is extremely fortunate for all of you that in this present era and at this present moment God has bestowed His help upon mankind, upon all of you, so that He has made it easier for you to achieve the purification which you need in order to aim at improving and perfecting your lives. That is the reason why some of you are able before long to feel things that others cannot receive so easily, and why some of you have already been able to obtain a kind of sample of how it will be later on when you die.

There are already some examples of this, brothers and sisters. Among others, Bapak received a letter from Japan, from Tokyo, which told of a strange event. The writer said that he had had a good friend who had also joined Subud quite a long time ago. On one occasion this friend told him,

“I cannot postpone telling you that I shall not be living in this world for much longer. It is God’s will that I should not live for long, but He has also decreed that I should have a wife and three children of whom the latest has only just been born and is now only about six weeks old. So I feel that my wife and children will be rather badly off if I do not live much longer, and what I want to say to you is that I want to ask you for your help. Later on my wife will also receive some help, but in the meantime, after I die, I want to ask you to find her some work. And before she is able to work, because she has only just had a child, please will you help her in some way that will not be too heavy for you?”

Then the first Subud member answered:

"All right, I will accept your request and I will try to find a way; try to find her some work and to give her whatever I can later on."

It seems that this Subud member subsequently forgot the request that his friend had made before his death. Then on one of the latihan nights all the others had gone into the latihan, but there was still one extra member outside, the one who had made this request to the man who wrote the letter. He was still waiting outside with him. Then he said to him,

"Brother, I hear that you have not yet done as I asked you? I asked you to find some work for my wife if possible, and if she had not yet found any work I asked you to help her in some way that would not feel too heavy for you.”

“Oh yes, so you did make that request.”

But he did not remember that the friend who made that request had already died. He was already dead. So then he said,

“I will do as you asked me, and I will go and see your wife and tell her that I will try to find her some work. Let us hope I can.”

For there did happen to be a place for her. That really happened. Then the member who had died thanked him in advance and said,

“Now I must say goodbye and not go into the latihan, because I have some work which means that I must leave here."

“All right. Do you not want to do just a little latihan?”

"No, thank you. Please excuse me now.”

And he went. The first man went into the latihan alone, and only after that did he remember that the member who had made that request had already been dead for about three months. He was amazed.

“How could someone already dead still come to the latihan and give me a message? And he did not do the latihan."

So then this man wrote to Bapak and asked for confirmation as to whether this was true. Then Bapak answered that indeed it was like that. Thus that member's jiwa really was already alive and it really was like that.

Well, this is what Bapak said just now, brothers and sisters; the latihan kejiwaan of Subud is truly the latihan of life. It is not a latihan of death. No. So it is as if what happened to that Japanese member is like a sample for you. And there are others; many other things like that, brothers and sisters.

Honolulu, Hawaii - December 24, 1977
Code Number : 77 HNL 2
Those of you who have had children - maybe one, two or three, or maybe some of you have had 10 or 12 children - Bapak shouldn't have to tell you this, you should already be aware of this, because you have made these children, and you should be aware of the process of a child being born and growing up. But the trouble is that it's precisely the people who have had 12 children who are totally unaware of it. And why are they totally unaware of it? Because the heart only likes the nice things; the heart only likes the pleasure, the enjoyment; so that all you are aware of at that moment is your wife. You have in front of you this wife - maybe she is beautiful or something - and this beautiful woman in front of you shuts off your closeness or your memory or your contact with the power of God. At that moment when you come together you forget the contact with the power of God, and the result is that the child who is born becomes a person who is not like a human being. Why? Because, as Bapak explained, the lower forces are always within us. The lower forces are always there and, therefore, they can always join in at that moment.

But what is clear is that if you have received the Latihan Kejiwaan, then you have the method - providing you go on with the Latihan Kejiwaan - you have the method of going back again, of correcting all the mistakes. Not your mistakes, but the mistakes of all your ancestors before you. Actually, the purpose of this latihan is not for your own salvation alone, but more than that - for the salvation of all those from whom you have descended: your parents, your grandparents, all your ancestors. Through your latihan they can be saved and redeemed from their poverty in hell, to a place where they can rise up again - thanks to the latihan that you have done. It is not only your mistakes that are forgiven in the latihan but all the mistakes of all those from whom you have descended. So it is sure that through doing the latihan, gradually all these mistakes will be forgiven, removed, broken down and annihilated.

Cilandak, Indonesia - March 5, 1978
Code Number : 78 CDK 2
That is the reason why, as Bapak said just now, you must never deviate from your worship of the One Almighty God, brothers and sisters, for it is God Who can separate all those things from your inner selves which otherwise cannot possibly be separated from them.

That is why Bapak suggests, brothers and sisters, that you must not allow bad feelings or a bad relationship to exist in your married life. It is better to weigh everything up carefully, so that you are in harmony in whatever you do. You must not behave as people do when they say that quarrels intensify love. You must not do that, or you will start throwing things, and everything will be flying through the air, and then, after that, you sleep together. You must not behave like that, you must not do it. You must settle things between you in the right way, and, like that, you are really worshipping God. This in time will cause the two of you, yourself and your wife or a wife and her husband, to form a happy and peaceful family with much good fortune.

This is why Bapak urges you to employ your hearts and minds, which are always tempting you. Once we have received this training in the latihan, we must not then just do the Latihan and leave it at that.

For God will not prepare any money for you at the Latihan hall or in the latihan. It is not for God to provide work for you. No; it is human beings who prepare money, work and all the things you need in life. It is not God who prepares these things. If God prepares anything, it is there in what is called heaven.

Cilandak, Indonesia - May 8, 1978
Bapak’e advice to Suresh Samuel and Shanti on the occasion of their
wedding reception in the Latihan hall
Code Number : 78 CDK 7
Brothers and sisters, one’s marriage, one’s wedding, is a time of joy and happiness; it is a moment to which people look forward and which they feel is really the happiest time of their lives, so much so that people say that then the whole world exists only for these two. Why is that ? Of course it is because this world is for the creatures of God who take mates in order to continue their race and their species.

In spite of that, brothers and sisters, marriage is nevertheless a test for human beings. It is a test for their lives. For of course once a man has a wife, once he is married, be can then no longer think only of himself, but must begin to think of someone else; that is, of his wife. So too for the wife, brothers and sisters; she must also think about her husband’s life and what his nature is like.

This is why it is therefore very necessary for people who marry to understand one another, and to be able to be aware of each other’s life, so that they can understand how it is for a married couple. For as a rule, brothers and sisters, people do not understand the concept of marriage, so that if something unpleasant occurs, then doubts and uncertainties arise. The wife arouses doubts in her husband, and it is also the same for her; sometimes she says that her husband arouses doubts in her. Thus each of them blames the other, and that is out of place, brothers and sisters.

Cilandak, Indonesia - July 2, 1978
Code Number : 78 CDK 14
The young ones are the ones who are late. Then when they look for a husband or a wife they will not find one for a long time. They get up much too late. Young men have to get ahead, then they can quickly marry and have children but it does not mean they will die quickly. No; they can quickly earn’ a living. Same of you here have arrived late, just strolling in. They wander slowly along; they do not care when they arrive.

In the old days there was a woman, a good woman, whose name was Sembodro. Sembodro was the wife of Arjuna. She walked slowly, she spoke slowly, in all her actions and in everything she did she moved slowly. Her heart, he feelings, were also like that. She was patient. Even if her husband had more than one additional wife, even if there were four, five, six, seven, or even up to forty, it did not matter. But nowadays the young people, or people as a whole, take Arjuna’s second wife, Srikandi, as the symbol of a woman of good character. Srikandi was quick and dexterous in everything. She spoke quickly, ate quickly, did everything quickly.

Nowadays you can choose which; you can choose Sembodro or Srikandi. Nowadays most people choose Srikandi. Nowadays men get impatient it they have a wife like Sembodro. They are impatient with her. If they go to the cinema, for instance, Sembodro likes to follow along behind. By the time she gets there, the film is almost over. That is Sembodro. Srikandi is not like that. She is already there before the doors open. If necessary, she can even be made a candidate, a representative. Yes, she is quick in everything. If one takes the one half way between those two extremes, her name was Larasati. Larasati means a harmonious heart. A harmonious heart means one that has been refined. Of course you understand what a heart is. A heart is a heart. Thus before doing anything Larasati first considers and weighs it up. Larasati also works quickly, but she considers beforehand. That is why Srikandi has dexterity, but it is Larasati who has the real skill.

Then there is also yet another, Sulastri. In Javanese, Sulastri means pleasant and sociable. She is hospitable and friendly. She laughs easily, even if no one invites her to laugh, but if she is invited to hate, she does not want to. She just laughs. That means that she is the one amongst the wives of Arjuna who was entrusted with household affairs. She is what is called a housewife.

But all this is symbolic, brothers and sisters, and not to be imitated. Nowadays just one wife keeps you busy, let alone two, three or four. But if you could cope with four, that would be something to be thankful for. Such a man could be called a champion. But if he were not a champion, then they would all beat him on the head. All his four wives would beat him in turn.

Christchurch, New Zealand - January 18, 1978
Code Number : 78 CHC 4
Another thing, brothers and sisters, and this is most important. Because of course people have wives or have husbands, Bapak advises you, when you sleep together, which is something very easy, although this is a private matter, when a husband and wife sleep together, you must not forget that it should be as if you were doing the Latihan Kejiwaan. You need not say anything aloud, but what you remember is Allah, Allah, Allah, so that those things in you which are your servants, all the various life forces, such as the material life force, for instance, will not become involved in your intercourse, and you will not be giving a ride to a setan or to the vegetable life force, or to a dog, a buffalo, a goat. You must not let that happen, but you should be directly in touch with the human jiwa, your own jiwa. That is what is important for all of you.

You can take your children as examples now, brothers and sisters. The children born after you came into Subud are different. These children are different from those born before you became Subud members and received the latihan. Sometimes these young children sit swaying like this, as if they were repeating the zikir; that is, Allah, Allah, Allah.

Cilandak, Indonesia - September 3, 1978
Code Number : 78 CDK 19
That is the reason why people will not get anywhere unless it is with their hearts. And furthermore, the mind rules and dominates them and is their teacher and guide in life in this world. That is the reason why trained thinkers, people who are good at using their minds, ask why should they not use their minds, because people who do not think cannot understand anything, and become apathetic. Of course; but do not forget that thought is something adventitious, something added on later. This is shown in the ilmu ( religious teachings ) and in the history received by the messengers of God; that is, the mohal ( impossible opposites ) of the twenty attributes of God come from the heart and mind. In fact they are the wuiud, qidam, baqa, mukhalafatu lilhawadisi wa qiyamuhu binafsihi. That is Arabic. That is Islam. It means that God precedes all beginnings and follows al1 endings. He envelops the whole of the universe that He has created. He creates and is not created. Thus if people speak of God having children, that is not correct. If God had children, of course God would have a wife. What would. God's wife be like? Thus if Allah had a wife, she would be called Allahin ( Mrs. God ). That is how it would be. No, brothers and sisters.

After Adam came into life in this world, after all of you came into life in this world, after each baby comes into life in this world, all of you were gradually and eventually more and more affected by this world. Supposing someone tells you that you must die, you say, 'Oh, no. Eh, what are you saying? I am someone who has worked hard; I have worked hard and gone to a lot of trouble, I have acquired a Mercedes, and now you tell me I must die. You cannot do that. I have a house as well.' Moreover he also has a wife, a beautiful wife; more than one wife, perhaps. Well, it seems a pity to die and even more so if one is young. In fact, even if one is old, like Bapak, who is already nearly eighty, if one is told one must die, one argues about it. 'Not yet, let me wait until Tuti is married, until Muti is married. When they are married, they will have children, and then the children will marry. Let me wait a while longer, please.'

It is obvious, brothers and sisters, that when a human being is born into this world, he cries. Then when he is about to die, he cries again. Well. let him cry. Of course he does not understand. If you can receive it, there are no boundaries between what is called heaven and this world. Because we originally come from being able to have everything and to do everything, we shall eventually return to being able to have everything and to do everything. But we shall leave the conditions of this world behind us.

Yogyakarta, Indonesia - December 23, 1978
Code Number : 78 JOG 2
Again Bapak will explain about the contents of the human self, of all of you. Your self is already filled with material forces, which are satanic forces. And what is satan? They are jinns, spooks and others. In short it is the etheric nation. Those are in you. When you sleep they sleep with you. When they eat, they eat with you; when you see, they see with you. But what is strange is, is that you don’t feel it, that when he is with the husband, he also sleeps with his wife, and. when he is with the wife he will sleep with the husband. It is never suspected, that the material forces, the satanic forces are within you. Thus you must be careful.

. . . Thus people are always sinning. To be loved by God Almighty, and they don’t do it, they don’t accept it well, but throw it away. Yes. There is even a man who already understands the kejiwaan, on the outside he says Allahu Akbar, but their inner says God is rude. How do you find that? Thus, devote to God Almighty, outwardly and inwardly. Don’t let it happen that your inner says this and your outer says that. Don’t do it. If both are united, so that the nature is merged, has become one, the boundary between life and death seems not to exist. This is the training, guidance and lead of God Almighty, which is manifested in the latihan kejiwaan of Subud, which has in fact great use and benefit.

You, the women will be guided, how to cook very deliciously, very nice. Yes. If you cook very well, what more about the other things. Isn’t it like that? You know yourself what the other things means. If it has really become like that, then will your husband never go astray. This will never happen. That is why so many husbands go astray because their wife cannot serve them well, they cannot make their husband behave like a chicken ( to feel at home ). Yes, but not in the meaning of fried chicken. Thus chicken means that they just want to be near their wife. No, but they don’t like to go wandering. Even if this is only a joke, a farce, but it is true, brothers and sisters, the harmony between husband and wife, this will bring happiness to your life, it will bring a happy implementation, so that your children and descendants will become true, will become good people, that will become the example of life to the human being.

Because in the latihan kejiwaan, you are already guided. Generally this happens to the women, many of them are now taking an interest in matters about their beauty, also about the health, In the latihan kejiwaan this is the source, because there is a story about it.

Once upon a time, the Prophet Muhammad SAW received an invitation from a king. Beside the Prophet Muhammad, also other kings were invited. It is obvious that the kings and the queens will be wearing a lot of diamonds. Then the wife of the Prophet, Khadijah asked : How about this, Prophet? We have received an invitation. What shall we wear? There will be not only common people who will come there, but the wives of kings, at least the wives of generals, of commanders, who will be using diamonds, glittering gold, which will be glowing. “Yes, why?” “Do we need to come?” “Yes. Because we have got an invitation.” “What must I wear?” “Just wear what you have.” “She obeyed, and then they left. Everybody were already there, complete, rich. But when the Prophet arrived with his wife, everybody were surprised. Because they saw Khatijah glittering. “Is this the wife of the Prophet? She must be very rich. They were all astonished. The were blinded by the glitter. Then it was over, they went home. “How was it?” Yes. People saw, that everything you wear was more then the others.” “Why was it so?” “Because of God.”

Thus, without latihan, without God’s blessing, even though you are very clever in beautifying yourself, in Javanese you say “juwarsi”, you are boring. Because your lipstick will reach till here. You won’t look like princess, but like Semar. Your eyes are so beautiful, and you put mascara around it, it will be too black. Bapak doesn’t want to prevent you from going to a beauty salon, a beauty parlor. No. That is all right. But it is better, if you can really feel and can receive the use and benefit of the latihan kejiwaan Subud, not only your face will be protected by God, but also your way. of walking. Wow, if you walk you will walk gracefully. Yes, because it is from God. If it is not from God, then you are a “juwarai”.

Cilandak, Indonesia March 17, 1979
Code Number : 79 CDK 8
( testing )

Your nature makes you rather patient, and this can be good, but when you are too patient, that is not good. In patience you also have to have a kind of calculation: your patience should not be more than a suitable amount.

A wife is like a locomotive who pushes from behind, and a husband is like a locomotive who pulls from the front. A wife's duty is to help to push her husband to progress. Now Bapak knows very well that your husband is A. And his nature is to be very slow. So if, with your patience, you just let him do what ever he likes, to be as slow as he likes, then it is your own fault if he doesn't make progress. Because if he is pushed by the locomotive who pushes from behind, he can also be fast.

So actually it is not right for you to be patient and say, "It doesn't matter, I leave him to do it the way he wants, because I am able to look for money, to earn money myself." That is not right, because even if you are able to earn money yourself, you still have to push your husband. It is the wife's duty to know the progress and the ability of her husband. Between the locomotive in front and the locomotive behind, in between is your life, the needs of your life. You have to work together. So Bapak warns A. not to feel that his wife is not happy with him or is angry with him if you push, because it is really your job to push him so that he can speed up. This is something that you have to do.

I left out something: if you leave A. by himself, and you just let him go from side to side, it's not right. Because if he goes from side to side and turns in the right direction, that's fine, but if he turns in the wrong direction, then it's your own fault.

There is another kind of wife, different from you, who, even though she is also filled up with fuel, as a locomotive, doesn't like to move. No matter what opportunity she has, she doesn't like to work or to do anything. And that also is wrong, because a husband, the locomotive in front, needs the locomotive behind to work and push. So a husband requires that his wife should also work.

London, England - August 27, 1979
Code Number : 79 LON 2
This is how it is, brothers and sisters, and so if you think about it, life is really hard for people. It is both hard and heavy, and light and easy. If you do it the hard way, it is hard; if you do it the easy way, it is very easy. You worship, in fact. With what do you receive the latihan? Do you need to fast? Do you need to cut down food and sleep? Do you need to cut yourself off from your wife, or does a wife need to cut herself off from her husband? Do you need to forget about money? Do you need to forget about clothes? No; on the contrary, you go to the cinema and then, after that you go to the latihan hall and you are able to receive the latihan. It is as easy as that. God has given this to all of you; an easy way, an opportunity, a simplification, you might say. Just be quiet, and there is 'Allah, Allah.' Who has made that happen? It is God. Of course, brothers and sisters, nothing happens without a beginning. Of course there is a beginning; No tree begins, as soon as it is planted, to bear fruit. No; it is planted and then it begins to grow. If it bears fruit as soon as it is planted it is not a tree. What should one call it? Just a picture of a tree. Well then, will you choose to possess a picture or the real thing?

Toyko, Japan - January 2, 1980
Code Number : 80 TYO 2
The way for human beings to improve their lives lies in themselves. You must not keep on asking God to do it, but examine your own lives. For the relationship between husband and wife is like a looking glass; it is a mirror reflecting the life of the family, so that the guidance which God gives will not be separate from the relationship between man and wife. That is why it is said that the ilmu ( spiritual wisdom ) which truly leads to God lies in marriage and in the harmony between man and wife, as was experienced by the prophet Muhammad. Thus it is good if man and wife are in harmony, and it is from that harmony that they will be able to receive evidence about their lives.

Cilandak, Indonesia - June 21, 1980
Code Number : 80 CDK 3
God is All-knowing, brothers and sisters, and God in His Omniscience will not cause a tree to bear fruit before it is mature. Why is that? God is All-knowing, and if the tree bears fruit before it is fully grown, it will not be able to grow, and it may even die. This is evident, and it is also like that for you. Your capacity to receive something really glorious has not yet appeared and does not yet exist. If something like that were given to you, there would be trouble. You would not become good or strong but, on the contrary, you would become confused. You have witnessed this, brothers and sisters; you have often seen and heard how people are when they are in crisis. Their will and their desire to become like this, this, this, this are very strong, whereas these people themselves are not strong, brothers and sisters. Their inner-selves are not yet strong, so that they become nabi sembrono ( feckless, half-baked prophets ) not true prophets. Many people say, 'Pak Subuh, I have seen, I have dreamed, I have felt that Pak Subuh is like the prophet Jesus.' 'What prophet Jesus?' 'Jesus Christ'. That is not so. If Pak Subuh were Jesus Christ, things would be difficult for me. My wife would not be happy with me if I were not Pak Subuh, and then how would it be? Even if Pak Subuh is not very handsome, his wife likes him as he is. She would say 'My husband and children are like bencang wengko ( broken potsherds which to their owner look like gold ).' However plain her husband or children may be, to a wife or mother they will look beautiful, while she will turn up her nose at others, however good-looking, who are not hers. It is like this.

Cilandak, Indonesia - June 22, 1980
Talk at Bapak's 79th Birthday Selamaten
Code Number : 80 CDK 6
( There was first the singing of "Happy Birthday" and “Long Life" to Bapak, and the cutting of the cake and the rice mountain. Then one of the members sang in Javanese, and Herbert Stewart was asked to sing. Then a solo. Then a song by one of the foreign sisters accompanied by a guitar, and "Butet" sung by Heroine Ruetz. )

( Bapak sings in Javanese, as follows )

May we receive the blessing of the One Almighty God.
May your latihan be able to spread everywhere.
May it become the basis for human behavior
All over the world.
For it is indeed the truth
That it is the duty of all mankind
To worship the One Almighty God
So that their hearts and minds may be peaceful.
So that, in its turn, the world may become peaceful and calm for mankind.
Come quickly then and worship the One Almighty God.
Let it not happen that at the end of our lives
We find ourselves far from the power of the One Almighty God.
For it is the power of God alone
Which can truly bring peace and calm to the life of mankind.

That is all, thank you.

It is a great pity that Bapak's voice is no longer what it used to be when Bapak was seventeen, when everyone would agree that it was still very beautiful.

Bapak wishes to remind you that Bapak's capacity to sing like this does not derive from any special training or effort, but it comes only from the quiet state of Bapak’s inner-feeling. It comes only from that inner-feeling, and so Bapak is able to receive many Kinanti melodies. Bapak receives melodies in the Kinanti mode which are not generally known and which do not as yet exist, for in the ordinary way only fourteen Kinanti melodies are known. This is actually what is meant by culture; that is it means the capacity to receive something new. That is why Subud should be a source of culture. But why have we not yet developed in this direction? Why have we not quickly obtained results in this case? Why has it been only Bapak who has developed? Bapak will sing a little more and this time Bapak will translate its meaning. One should really stand up when one sings because everything has to move. Like this, for instance ( Bapak utters a sound ). This sound also brings good health.

People are not obliged to use their voices but it is very necessary to do so and especially to sing out loud ( Bapak sings a melody ). If Bapak were still young that would be beautiful, but Bapak is already old.

( Bapak sings in Javanese )

I give praise and thanks to God that Dr. Maliwa and his wife are prepared to come. I hope that all of you understand. It is Dr. Maliwa who looks after Bapak.

This is another strange thing, a very strange thing.

( Bapak sings in an unintelligible language which sounds like Arabic and gives an Indonesian version of its meaning. )

Allah has given his teaching to mankind.

Bapak wanted to sing a Javanese song, but it comes out in Arabic

Make an effort to strengthen your faith at this present time when the world is passing through a crisis.
Make your faith strong through worship.
Worship is the only path for you to follow
Which can avert the dangers and disasters which threaten you all.
This is what was taught by the prophets. By the prophet Jesus Christ and by the prophet Muhammad on whom be peace.
You must not depart from the power of God which is present in you.
In truth God loves all His creatures.
He will always protect you, guide you, lead you all.
Be constant therefore in your worship of the One Almighty God.
May God the All Just have compassion upon His creatures.

Wisma Subud, - Cilandak, Indonesia - June 27, 1984
Code Number : 84 CDK 7a
It was prophesied that Bapak would be a great man. The path that that prophecy took, or the process through which Bapak had to go to fulfill it, resulted in what we have now: all of you and all of the people throughout the world who have received the latihan kejiwaan. If you look at this result, it is something totally new. It is nothing that has every happened before because there has never before been anything like this Subud brotherhood in the history of the world.

Bapak has been telling you his own story or his own experience. In fact, Bapak was able to know and understand this process before it happened. For example, right at the beginning, before Bapak received this he was already given to know that his wife would not be able to follow him. And indeed it was true. Bapak's first wife died when Bapak was 36. Bapak married when he was 26 and his wife died when he was 36. The reason she died was because she couldn't follow. She couldn't accept what Bapak had received. It was not possible for her to accept the duty that Bapak had been given. What she wanted was that Bapak should go back and get a job again and become an ordinary person. Bapak explained to her that Bapak could not longer work in the way that ordinary people work; that he had been given a job to do which had to do with carrying out God's instructions; to pass on what Bapak had received; to travel around the world and to become a channel for God's grace to mankind. But she was not able to accept or follow that.

Brothers and sisters, this is Bapak's story but each of you will have your own story. Each of you will be able, providing that you are really diligent and faithful in following what you receive in the latihan kejiwaan, each of you will develop your own story, whatever it is, in line with your own capacity and ability. At the very least, you will experience what is called "life after death." At the very least the life of the jiwa that comes after you die will be a reality for you.

There are many experiences of this reality of the next world; many, many experiences. Bapak has many letters that he has received during the years from Subud members relating to life after death. Bapak doesn't know what happened to the letters. Usually when he wants to look for them, nobody remembers where they have been fried. Bapak knows that they are filed by the Secretariat and Bapak assumes that they know how they are filling them because these letters are actually very important.

For example, Bapak still remembers long, long ago, after Ibu died, receiving a letter from America from a group of ladies who did latihan together. This experience was not the experience of one of them - but a number of ladies doing latihan shared the same experience. In their latihan they saw the ceiling of the hall open and a golden chariot or carriage descend from above. Now Bapak doesn't know if it was real gold or not, but it looked like gold. When the carriage came down from the sky and landed in the latihan hall, there descended from it, first of all, a very handsome and impressive man with a moustache and a beard, followed by Ibu. Ibu was able to talk with the ladies present and converse with them. "I have been sent to visit you by Bapak who asked me to come and remind you to be faithful in your latihan." The lady who was writing the letter was able to ask, "Ibu, who is the man with you?" Ibu answered, "That is the archangel Gabriel, and he has been ordered by Bapak to accompany me." Then Ibu said, "That is all. I don't have a lot of time to spend with you because this place where you are is too hot for me now. I can't stay here too long. But the main thing is that you are really faithful to the latihan and never abandon it." Then she got back into her carriage and went away again.

Bapak knows that among you there are many who have had experiences one time or another which reflect a similar kind of reality, a similar kind of experience connected with a life that is beyond this life, a life after death. But most of you are shy or embarrassed to talk about it because these experiences cannot be verified by anyone else, They are only real for the person who experiences them. That of course is the nature of Subud.

Amen. Bapak Muhammad-Subuh Sumohadiwidjojo