Coombe Springs, England August 11, 1957
Code Number : 57 CSP 7
When you first receive the training, you feel movements within you. And those movements will gradually go deeper, and for that you still need to receive a great deal of movement. It is not just your hands and feet that need to move and come alive, but all the members of your body. So don't be concerned when you're at home - as well as in the latihan here - and you are lying down and your mouth is exercised. Sometimes you laugh, sometimes not; sometimes you giggle; sometimes it's as if your mouth is quarrelling. You need to be exercised in this way by your soul, so that your mouth will become clean; then you can receive words straight from your soul, without going through the thinking, and you can hear words uttered by your soul as the journey of your life.

Similarly with the other members of your body. All the members of the body are exercised spontaneously; each comes alive and moves by itself. For example, the eye that has been trained in this way will itself become aware of what is good to see and what is not, and what kind of seeing arouses greed and what kind of seeing gives rise to peacefulness.

It's as if each member is itself responsible for its own safety and well-being. It's the same with the members of the body: they each look after their own safety. So, in the legs, for example, Bapak says, Bapak walks, and in front there's a hole. So Bapak walks like this. This is in the legs. If the whole is alive, even as far as your brain, and you want to go there, it won't happen. Why? It's not good. It can't happen by itself. The legs don't even have to walk. But, if the whole is not yet alive, only these, the legs, know the way by themselves. The other parts of you don't yet know.

Bapak will give you an illustration. Suppose Bapak is going to get a big star in September. Bapak doesn't think about it at all, because Bapak doesn’t know and doesn't expect to get a big star.

Bapak just leaves it to Bapak's body, as to what will happen for Bapak in September. Like this, for example: 'Body, what will happen for me in September? Will I get a star or a beating?' Bapak stands up. If someone is going to get a star, he will certainly make a movement ( Bapak demonstrates ) If, for example, in September Bapak was not going to get a star but a beating, what would happen to me? ( Bapak demonstrates ). Like that, for example. Before it happens, there are already signs in the body. So, if you have received a little in the latihan, you will experience what is going to happen; there are always signs, so you won't feel anxious about what's going to happen to you.

This latihan, as well as bringing the whole body to a state of health, also brings about an awareness of what will be and what will come to you. Naturally, this will increase the calmness of your feelings. For instance, suppose there are reports that in nineteen fifty eight this earth will be like this and like that, and people will be wiped out. But when Bapak asks, is it true? 'No!' he is told. So, such reports are only to make people extremely confused, so people whose children are here in London, or in France, or in America, will call their children home.

Coombe Springs, England- December 12,1957
Code Number : 57 CSP 13
In carrying out your obligation to worship the One God, and to act in harmony with your inner being, it is necessary for you to receive, to know and be aware of the awakening of the inner feeling that is within your real self. Before you received the awakening of your self, everything in you was closed up. All your physical members were influenced by the power of the thinking, imagination and desires. Moreover, before your body and your inner feeling were awakened by God's power, it was as if your thinking mind and its understanding wanted to inform and instruct the inner feeling, so that it could know and understand the nature of God's presence and greatness.

So, many people who seek the way to God try to find the real nature of the inner feeling by thinking about it. Their thinking mind is so advanced. And they represent what they are aiming for in the pictures their thinking mind and desires can create. Many of these seekers run aground and fail to reach their goal. For, in fact, the awakening of the soul ( jiwa ) occurs, not because it can be thought out by the thinking mind, but solely through God's gift, which enables you to stop the force and will of your thinking and feelings.

Why is this? As Bapak explained just now, that is not the way for man to worship God. The way is for us human beings to find the signs that show God's will, which is created within every part of us, and to carry them out conscientiously. Clearly, man worships God when he is able to find what is already there within his inner feeling. Then he can behave and work following the signs that have been created in the inner feeling of all the members of his physical body. Indeed, seen from the standpoint of the ordinary thinking and feelings - by 'ordinary' Bapak means the thinking mind only, and the highest reach of the feeling only -this matter is something that is beyond the thinking mind, beyond the bounds of human reason; it is something that really cannot be believed.

Bapak does not find fault with this view. Indeed, it is like that in the opinion and understanding of the mind. It cannot comprehend what is within the inner self. For this is not something that can be thought about; it is not something that can be understood by the thinking. It comes from the inspiration of God alone, only from God's gift, which in Islam is called the miracle ( mukjizat ) of God. Of course, we cannot know, we cannot understand or be aware of God's gift, God's power and God's understanding, if it is not willed by Him, the One God, that we should be able to understand what is given to us. Also, if we could know God with our thinking mind, it would mean that God's nature would be the same as ours. But then, surely, people would not attribute names to God, and say that God is All-knowing, Most Wise and Most Glorious, and that He is the One who created us all.

Of course, you will have guessed the reasons for this yourselves: God's nature is not like ours. Clearly, if God's nature is different from ours, we will not be able to adjust our thinking, heart and feelings to the One God. Nor will we be able to receive with ordinary feelings how the feelings of God may be. Take an example near at hand, that of human beings and animals. As animals are made differently from us humans, we cannot grasp what they are thinking. Similarly, animals cannot grasp what we are thinking. We can only understand the thinking of animals from their movements, if we can know them in their habitual daily life.

It is due to such a difference in states that human beings cannot understand or grasp with their mind what God wills. Man can only receive it within his feelings, if it is willed from above by the One God. Then, man's soul is awakened; everything in him is awakened. And in the end he is able to know the signs ( indicating ) what he needs to do, which exist within his inner feeling and within his inner self.

London, England - March 4, 1958
Code Number : 58 LON 1
The spiritual training ( latihan kejiwaan ) of Subud is actually worship of God on the part of humankind. This is so, despite the fact that it isn't yet a way or a form of worship that people -such as all of you, ladies and gentlemen - are accustomed to seeing. It doesn't resemble the ways in which people ordinarily show respect and submission to God or to their superiors. Yet in reality it is still the true way of worship. The reason for this is that, although in the training there are as yet no signs of order, nevertheless the reason that you are able, ladies and gentlemen, to move and to be moved from within is that you have moments, or periods, when your hearts, minds and desires ( nafsu ), ladies and gentlemen, are opened, or have stopped working.

Malang, Indonesia - July 22, 1958
Recording 58 MLG 1
When Bapak was in Germany, Professor Durkheim, after receiving this latihan, wanted to check the outer aspects.

'Pak, I really believe what Bapak has brought and I have experienced it. But there is still one thing.'

'Oh, and what is that?'

'My technique for knowing the signs that are in Bapak.'

'Where?'

'If Bapak will allow me, I would like to see the real Bapak from the front, and the signs on Bapak's body.'

'Yes, all right, just as long as you don't scratch me.'

He surveyed my whole body. He looked at my hands and everything. When he had done, he said, 'Wonderful! I tell you Bapak, I have studied this for thirty-five years - he is sixty-eight - and I have never seen a human being with signs like Bapak. Napoleon had similar signs, but they only enveloped this world. Bapak has signs that envelop both this world and the life after death. Now I am even more convinced that no one will possess something tremendous without having the signs that correspond. Did you know this?'

'No.'

'You did not feel it?' 'No.' 'Strange.'

'Well, it's not strange since I don't feel it.'

'Whether or not Bapak wishes to accept it, I believe it.'

'Very well.'

So, yes! ( Bapak laughs )

Colet Garderns, London, England - September 22, 1959
Code number of Recording: 59 LON 7
Many people have endeavored to comprehend and know how the soul grows, using their mind and their intellect. It cannot be done. They are completely unable to find what they are looking for because they are still using their minds to be aware of and experience the growth of the soul; they believe that their mind can perceive and understand the growth of their soul within their being.

In spite of this, people who make efforts on the spiritual path – meaning those who study spiritual matters – still keep using their thinking mind. And, because they force their mind to try to comprehend the progress of the soul and the nature of the soul, their entire thinking, heart and desires become immersed in the inner feeling. This eventually leads them to neglect and ignore their everyday needs as human beings living in this world. Because of this, other people say that those who study spiritual matters, or those who try to experience the growth of their soul, neglect and go against the development of their life in the world, so their life deteriorates and their position in society worsens.

Because the results they achieve are unconvincing for people in general, and their worldly lives suffer a decline, many people, particularly intellectuals, feel that the worship of God is in fact useless. Many of them say God does not actually exist and that it is better to study things that can really be known and understood by the thinking mind – for that is where the truth is.

People who say these things cannot be blamed for this situation. In fact, it is the fault of the people they are talking about. Why? Because the way they engage in their so-called spiritual endeavors is through the will of their heart and mind; it is not because they are inspired by God, not because it is willed by God, nor because they are already able to stop their thinking, their desires and their heart.

What is the reason that such errors have been endlessly repeated, over and over, until now? Because it is indeed human nature that people very much like to act in their own interest; they rush to pursue gain, they rush to fulfil their desires. They also have no patience, and immediately broadcast and give instruction to others before they themselves have matured and understood. It has become normal for people to give explanations and advice to others, while they themselves still need to receive advice in order to become aware of what is right and what is wrong within them.

The result of this is that what people get in the end is far, far different from that which was received by the prophets, from what was received by the human beings long ago who received the reality of worship from the One God. In fact, there are many people who say they worship God and believe in God, and they ask God for this and ask God for that; but they don’t really understand who they are worshipping, where God’s power is, nor the signs of God’s power within themselves.

With the birth of Subud, through the spiritual way all of you have received and are practising, ladies and gentlemen, you will receive real evidence that God exists. The signs of God’s power are there within each one of you: they are what arises and moves when your thinking mind, heart and desires are not working. This is the evidence for you that matters of the soul are God’s domain, and do not require the intervention of the human mind, desires and heart.

This way, your heart, desires and mind become healthy and work only for things they are able to achieve. And your mind, heart and desires will not be carried away into a dream world, a world where there is no reality.

And in that state you will become someone who is able to worship God because it is willed by God, because you obtain guidance from God and are also able to do whatever is within your capacity to look after your life in this world. You will be able to work in a normal way, in an office for example; to do business, farm, to raise livestock, build houses or other things, or to be a school teacher. So it will no longer be possible for other people to say that this spiritual training of ours is an activity which stifles the progress of human life on earth.

And you will really and truly be able to fulfill the promises made between God and human beings: namely, that they do not neglect their duty as human beings who have been created complete with all their tools for living on this earth, and they will be looked after and guided and watched over from behind by the power of God, who is always with them.

This accords with the words of Moses: Moses became a shepherd who tended his goats, and God was his shepherd, who always watched over him. This was also said by Jesus, to his disciples and others, ‘God always accompanies you in whatever you do.’ We – all of you – are able to witness the reality of this: that within you there are the signs of the power of God that will be a shepherd for you all.

Melbourne, Australia - March 8, 1963
Code Number : 63 MEB 2
Certainly, human beings in general can live happily on this earth if they live in harmony, love one another and help one another in life. This already exists and happens in the latihans you experience; although maybe only a little, there are signs that God’s will for human beings is that they should be harmonious in their actions on this earth. This is so that they may achieve happiness in life. So God does not want you to think only about spiritual things or life after death; rather it is God’s will that you use your thinking mind for thinking about things of the world, and use your inner feeling for receiving what God gives to you.

Los Angeles, CA USA - August 28 1963
Code Number : 63 LAX 6
So if the women among you like to put on make up and wear attractive clothes, that is not forbidden; it is good. It is very important that you look after yourself and wear clean and pleasant clothes. But as well as that, you need to understand the meaning of a woman making herself look her best and wearing clothes that are clean and of good quality. With the latihan you will be able to understand the significance of the clothes that you need.

Bapak will make it clearer. After Bapak had done latihan, latihan, latihan, latihan, latihan, there was a time when he was doing his latihan, just as you do it, and he saw himself dressed, but – wow – not in these clothes. He was surprised himself, because he was wearing very beautiful clothes. Bapak asked himself, his own guru, ‘What does this mean?’

‘This means that I, my soul, has moved upwards, has received a diploma, has been given the sign of a greater soul.’

So, in order to find out whether your soul has grown or not, you will later come to understand the signs for yourself.

Brothers and sisters, these are some of the realities regarding the content of the Subud latihan that the helpers should understand, so that their heart should not continue to doubt because they have not yet found what they are looking for.

Vancouver, Canada - September 27, 1963
Code Number : 63 YVR 4
If you, if human beings, take pride in and glorify only the comprehension, intelligence and understanding of the heart and thinking, and if what they consider as happy, comfortable, noble and excellent in their life is all to do with the achievements of the heart and thinking, then, when the time comes for them to die, that feeling of happiness in their heart, which they have always glorified, will instantly disappear. So their experience of happiness lasts only up to the moment of their end.

That is why the prophets and messengers, human beings who really trusted God, besides using their thinking and their heart to look after their lives while in this world, also received God’s guidance, which they could receive from their soul. But the soul cannot do that, cannot receive that guidance, if the heart and thinking constantly disturb it. Therefore, besides doing their work to be able to obtain food and clothing for their lives in the world, the prophets also worshipped God by surrendering, with acceptance and patience. And eventually, when they reached their end, the abundance and contentment they had experienced during their life on earth changed and became the contentment and nobility of the life of their soul. So the contentment of the life experienced by their individuality was not bounded by their death.

You will be able to receive signs or indications of all that Bapak just described if you do the latihan diligently, with patience, acceptance and a willingness to let go; meaning that you truly look after your individuality, love yourself and respect yourself. The signs Bapak is referring to are the unexpected experiences he mentioned earlier, which come from beyond yourself, and which bring unlooked-for joy in your life. They can also be something really strange or mysterious that you feel unexpectedly.

Let Bapak illustrate: sometimes you are sitting and you smell a wonderful fragrance, even though there is nothing nearby and you are not wearing any perfume yourself. Sometimes you are sitting and you get a blissful feeling, unlike anything you have ever experienced before. Such experiences are indications of how it will be later, when you have died, in your life after death. All those experiences are received by your soul and your inner feeling.

That is why it is very important for you to do the latihan diligently: to enable you to experience the unexpected. And you cannot describe that to others, or force them to receive it if they have not yet received it for themselves.

In short, you will eventually experience many things that will seem strange and mysterious. Bapak does not have to describe them all or describe them one by one, because if you have not experienced them yourselves you will just listen, you will certainly not believe them. In fact you will listen to Bapak as if he is telling fairy tales; you will think his explanations are just fantasy.

However, the reality is that the results of the Subud latihan are not like a dream. No, it is very different. But of course it is not real in the way outer things are real: it does not mean that once your soul is good and high, once your feeling is clean and your soul is wide and powerful, that money will rain on you from above. No, because that is an outward thing; but what you will be able to receive is the content or the essence [of something].

In case you respond to what Bapak is saying by asking whether it really is possible for you to receive something like that, he will give an example. In Indonesia at the moment there is a Subud member from Germany called Leonore Kuplis, who is a doctor. One day Bapak did a test with her, and she felt something truly miraculous. She described it as ‘wonderful’. She said, ‘Ah, compared to that, my life in this world is meaningless – I have never experienced anything as blissful as what I just received.’

As a result of this she began to make herbal remedies for sick people. The remedies are no different from those that other people make, but people who take her remedies say that, apart from it healing their sickness: ‘This remedy tastes better than beefsteak, it is better than a delicious dish.’ They say, ‘Besides healing my sickness, after I take it my whole body feels fresh.’

This is a reality. So it is not true that there is no hope for you, no chance for you to obtain something like this. You do have a chance, even if you do not know how it will come, or whether it will be a lot or a little. You will get something. But to obtain it you need to do your latihan diligently, to be patient and to be steadfast in adversity.

Blonay, Switzerland - July 26, 1964
Code Number : 64 BLN 3
Bapak has no feelings of dislike. None at all. Bapak regards no one as his enemy. And this does not apply only to people but even to satanic beings, about whom people generally say, ‘A‘udhu bi’l-Lahi mina ’sh-shaitani ’r-rajim’[Arab.], which means, ‘Oh, God, keep away the accursed satan’. Bapak does not dislike them. And because he does not dislike them they come; yes, and it doesn’t matter. As a result they do not bother Bapak in the least, whereas many of you are bothered by them. They do not disturb Bapak because he does not hate them. That is the reason why it is not Bapak who looks for his sustenance but his sustenance looks for Bapak.

There are many signs, brothers and sisters. The members in London have maybe witnessed them. And so have the members in America and South America, if they are willing to bear witness and willing to believe it. It happened that in a place where it never rains, the night before Bapak arrived, there was heavy rainfall. As a result, Bapak’s arrival the next morning was celebrated by everyone in town, because they were so happy to have some rain.

A similar thing happened once when Bapak was coming here, to Switzerland. Before he came Mrs Häfeli said, ‘Bapak, don’t come to Switzerland, because everywhere is very icy. If Bapak came here tomorrow, what would we do? Bapak would not be able to come to my house because of all the ice.’

‘Oh, no. I have already promised; I shall come tomorrow.’

That night there was a heavy rain in Switzerland. When Bapak arrived, everything was clean. There was no ice.

These are signs that Subud members have experienced. Mr Bennett himself says that Bapak always carries the sun in his bag, so that if he arrives in a place where the weather is bad, it changes and becomes good. That’s what he says. So it is not only people, and not only Subud members who love Bapak. The ice and the rain love him too.

That is the difference between someone who has been purified and those who are not yet fully purified. It was the same with the prophets and with Jesus Christ when they were alive. People always loved Jesus. Well, of course there are always exceptions, among a thousand people who loved him there would be one who hated him, because that is how people are. They are like that because they still have a human body.

So do not imagine that someone who has become united with God’s power will have God’s authority. No. While they are in this world their authority will be that of a person. For example, if they have money they can get around; if they don’t have any money, they cannot. It will be quite different later, when they have left this world and returned to their own world, which is where they really belong. That is why Jesus said, ‘One day I shall return to my kingdom. There I have authority.’

Wolfsburg, Germany - August 16, 1964
Code Number : 64 WOB 2
God always has compassion for human beings, and loves them. Indeed God has created human beings as the highest and most perfect creatures on this earth, and gives them whatever they strive for or endeavour to do. But God does not want human beings to use what they receive in the wrong way, so that it harms them. So, it is not surprising if, to date, human beings have been able to discover extraordinary things, like objects that can be sent into space and used to discover the secrets of outer space. From God’s point of view all of that is nothing; God will give more than that, and maybe enable people to fly to the moon.

But human beings ought to be grateful for such gifts from God; and the gratitude of human beings to God is not like the gratitude of one person to another. The gratitude of human beings towards God is that they use all these things for a good cause, for the sake of well-being and peace between the peoples of the earth.

Viewed from the realm of the soul … well, Bapak says ‘viewed from the realm of the soul’, but for all of you this is just a story. Just listen to it, you do not need to think deeply about it; and do not ask for proof, because the proof is in the realm of the soul, and as yet you are not able to discover it in your latihan. Bapak is speaking about the earth, which has existed for millions of years: not one thousand or two thousand, not twenty-five thousand or fifty thousand; whereas the stories of human beings that have come down to us, that we can think about, that have been written down from the signs left behind, span at most twenty-five or fifty thousand years. So it is clear that all sorts of things must have taken place on the earth before that time.

And seen from the realm of the soul, it has happened – not just once or twice but over and over again – that the earth was inhabited by human beings who are not spoken about in our histories, only in the history of the soul. During that earlier time it happened repeatedly on this earth that there were human beings whose knowledge surpassed the knowledge of people today.

Well, of course you will ask, ‘Where is the proof, Bapak?’

Bapak cannot give you any proof. He has been given the proof by God, so if you want proof, ask God for it directly. That is the process of the latihan. Later you will be able to receive the proofs in the realm of the soul.

The same applies to the earth itself: the earth is always experiencing changes. Well, it did not happen yesterday or the day before yesterday, but a few hundred thousand years ago. About half a million years ago there was no dry land in Europe and Asia. All you could see was ocean. The dry land was then all to the south. Then a change came, with the result that now there is Europe, Asia and America; and there is you.

You have probably never guessed this, and are asking yourself, ‘Is it true that such changes occur on the earth?’ Indeed, the human thinking mind would not imagine this, but with the soul, as Bapak just said, you can receive something that is beyond human capability. And whose capability are we using? It is the capability of the Almighty: the Almighty can inform you when your state is beyond the human.

And you certainly wouldn’t imagine that what are now called the south and north poles were once east and west, west and east. Here too, if you ask Bapak for proof, he cannot give you any, unless you are able to receive it for yourself. It is God who can give you this knowledge, not human beings, since it is beyond human ability.

Bapak does not know whether any of you have been able to receive something like this, but there are members who have been able to receive a little. This makes Bapak glad because it confirms the truth of what he has received. Even though he has faith in God, if nobody else could confirm what he has received, it would worry him. He would ask himself, ‘Why can’t anyone else corroborate these things?’

Bapak will tell you a story. There was a member who received something during her latihan, even though it was not yet very high or very advanced. While she was doing latihan her eyes were opened. But it was not these eyes, because her eyes were still shut tight; what was opened was her sight. She could see her surroundings, but she no longer saw the walls or the house she was in. What she saw was a broad open space where there were no houses or trees, as if she was standing in a football field or a broad open square. She was surprised by this and might have opened her eyes, but she didn’t; she went on looking at the scene. Then she thought to herself, ‘Ah! This may be what Pak Subuh described: what happens when a person has been purified to a large extent and is able to receive what God gives them.’

This gave her courage to keep following whatever she saw. Then her arms started to get longer and longer and longer. She watched her arms getting longer and longer, and she followed her hands as they moved. They moved on and on, and eventually reached the seashore. She kept on watching, and followed her hands as they moved over the sea until they reached another shore. She thought to herself, ‘This is a land I have never seen before. It must be some other country.’

She just followed what was happening. Not long afterwards her hands reached Bapak’s house in Jalan Jawa. There they stopped. And then both her hands started to move upwards, and moved like this [gesture], like when you make this gesture of salutation in the latihan. After that her hands started to move back and her arms got shorter and shorter and shorter, until they returned to where she was doing latihan.

Then it changed. Her body started getting taller and taller and taller, but it moved very fast. Her heart remained steadfast; she felt happy rather than afraid, because she thought to herself, ‘Yes, maybe this is my way towards Almighty God.’ This went on until she could feel her head going through the clouds, up through the atmosphere. But after she had gone on and on, higher and higher, she came to a point where she could see the earth receding further and further away, until she could no longer see it at all. Then she asked herself, ‘Where am I now? Can I go further still?’

As soon as her heart started to work and her thinking started to question, she began to descend again. She descended and returned to where she had been doing latihan. Only then did she open her eyes. After it was finished she sat down and reflected, ‘What was this experience I just had?’ Finally, she wrote a letter to Bapak in Jakarta and asked him to explain it. Bapak answered her, and she was satisfied with his answer.

When it comes to something like this you are bound to wonder whether it is all true. That is because you have not yet been able to confirm it for yourself, since you have not experienced anything similar. Nor can Bapak guarantee to you that you are certain to experience something similar if your feelings are like those of this woman – that is, patient, accepting and willing to let go. Indeed, this woman is really clear and her heart is rather clean: she is not constantly disturbed by the desires in her heart and mind.

Because the example Bapak talked about is a woman, maybe it gives the women confidence, as it means there is already another woman who has experienced this. But the men should not feel discouraged; because actually there is no difference between men and women, and it is quite possible that you will receive something like this, or even more than this. Therefore Bapak hopes you will not feel disappointed or discouraged. What you need is simply what Bapak just said: to feel patient, accepting and willing to let go, as is symbolised in the name Susila Budhi Dharma; that is, having the qualities of Susila, Budhi and Dharma.

It is told in the gospels that when Jesus was born into this world, many people – well, not so many, but some – could see stars around Jesus; and when they looked more closely they recognised the planets that surround this earth. This is true; it is not just a story. It was real, but not part of ordinary reality: it was a reality in the realm of the soul. And what was the reason? It was because Jesus Christ was a pure soul who had been born into this world, and he was in a state of immensity.

This is borne out by an experience … this is another story, about Bapak’s own mother. Once, Bapak’s mother woke up unexpectedly in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, as old people often do. As soon as she woke up – she had not even opened her eyes yet – she noticed there were lights around her. At first she thought they were electric lights, but when she looked properly she realised that they were not light bulbs but stars, like the stars in the sky. She looked right and left, but no longer saw the walls of her room, just open space. And when she tried to work out what was happening and where she was, she saw that she was no longer on her bed, on her mattress, but was up in the air far away from anything around or below her. As soon as Bapak’s mother realised this, she became frightened. When she became frightened she felt as if she was thrown down; she descended rapidly until eventually she felt herself once again on her bed, and opened her eyes. When she opened her eyes she saw that she was once again in her room.

In this way, through the latihan, we can now verify for ourselves that some things that are told in religion and written in the holy books, which people ordinarily consider to be just stories, are really true. It is clear, therefore, that the latihan is a realisation of the stories in the holy books.

Again, to the women: do not get conceited because all these signs have involved women and they still very rarely happen to men. But … well, as Bapak said to you just now, the men should not feel discouraged or feel that they have been left behind, because you can only receive such things if you truly feel patient, accepting and submitted to the greatness of God, and are genuinely patient in receiving whatever you are able to receive.

Oslo, Norway - September 10, 1964
Code Number : 64 OSL 2
And once the life of your soul and the life of your inner feeling – your life in the latihan and outside the latihan – have become equal, equal in height and depth and equally strong, then when the time comes that your inner feeling as a person and your heart and mind cease to work, that is to say, when you die, your consciousness, your awareness and understanding of life, and your living feeling, will simply move over from here to here. And there will be no difference whatever.

That is really true, brothers and sisters; and, as Bapak has already told you, this has been exemplified and demonstrated by the life of Christ. Christ moved from the worldly life to the life of the soul that we call death. Therefore Christ died from human life, but continued to live in the life of the soul. That is his example. And you have now begun, step by step, to be guided, led and educated in that direction. Who is educating you? None other than Almighty God. Therefore it is best if you do not keep searching or thinking about it. Just leave it to God, and use your thinking and your heart as a normal human being. That means working to make money and all the things that are useful for your life in this world.

You will be able to receive and witness this once you have been able to receive the signs, the living signs of the reality of your worship of God. In the Christian religion that is the sign of the cross. Not the cross as a material object, but the living sign of the cross that brings you to life and moves you in your life. You will be able to receive that and feel it as something real. The same is true for Islam: you will be able to receive and feel the living alif sign.

We are lucky indeed that God has helped us to witness the reality of our faith in God. We have faith that God exists, but if there is no proof or evidence, our faith will certainly be half and half. There will be times when we have faith and times when we do not; sometimes we will believe, sometimes not. But we have received evidence and proofs: living signs that show that God has authority, and that in our life there is a Power that moves us.

So, the fact that you have received such a grace from God is a blessing for you of immeasurable greatness and weight. Therefore Bapak simply hopes that you will not waste this help and gift from God; because if you waste it or forget about it, you will feel disappointed later on, when it is too late for you to be helped.

If you want to understand the difference between you and other people who are still trying to look for God and for the way to God, one could say that the hand of God has filled you or manifested within you. Or that God’s power is within you. So God only needs to say, ‘Follow Me!’ Whereas people who have not received this are still at the stage of searching: they are still trying to find where God is, and following this or that method. That is the difference, brothers and sisters.

Therefore, if the reality is that you are still searching, it means that you have not yet understood or realised that you are already being guided by God. Why are you still searching? By doing that you are in fact abandoning your own individuality in favour of something outside of you, and eventually that is bound to lead you to a path that is not straight and not suited to you.

So, you do not need to use your imagination to figure it out, because, after all, you are simply following God. God knows your strength. And because God knows your state, your strength, your capacity and everything about you, if you cannot walk yet, God will lead you by gently drawing you forward. But if there is someone else who can already walk, God will take them for a run. So you need only to follow; God knows your strength, and will adjust His guidance and direction to that.

Hence you need not feel disappointed if you have not yet received or discovered something deep and wide; it is simply that the time for you to attain that has not yet come. Later, when the time comes, you will certainly not need to ask: you will feel it and receive it spontaneously.

Cilandak, Indonesia - July 31, 1966
Code Number : 66 TJK 2
It is a fact that the desires are tools created by God for human beings to enable them to act and to live in this world. But in reality our will is not limited to that. If possible, we should be able to live and be aware of our life and to act in our life both while we live in this world and also later, after we have died. The difference between these two is that our life in this world is the life of our desires, and our life after we have died is the life of our soul. This is why you need to do the latihan. You do the latihan to train yourself to get to know your physical and your spiritual parts, your body and your soul.

That is so you really love your self. Do not love your ears, love your self. If you were to love your ears, for example, there will come a time when your ears cannot hear anything any more. If you love your legs, there will come a time when your legs may no longer work, like when they are paralysed. That is not the case if you love your self – your understanding and your consciousness of life. For you are certain to die. It cannot be otherwise. Therefore, if possible, you need to become aware of your life now and your life later.

Coming back now to mystical teachings: people who follow mystical teachings are looking for the same thing. What that means is that they too would like to experience heaven, and would like their lives to be noble and sublime after they die. But what are the signs? One cannot determine whether a mango is sweet without examining it outwardly. You have to examine the tree, the skin, the flesh. You have to look at all of it, only then can you determine that this is a sweet mango. So the signs are important, brothers and sisters, the normal outward signs, the body and the feeling. How can you feel later, after you die, if your feeling is not yet alive while you are living in this world? This is why you need the latihan: so that you can experience the life of the feeling while you are in this world, so that the life of your feeling joins and becomes one with your soul.

If you were to ask whether a person who has died is able to feel: well, a dead person cannot. But if the feeling of the person who has died is alive, if it has already been brought to life by God, then why not? In fact, that person will be able to feel more than what is usual; in other words, more than they could feel when they lived in the world.

Paris, France - April 16, 1967
Code Number : 67 PAR 1
It is clear that God’s will has been embodied in human beings. But what about them? Why are people, who embody God’s will within them, unable to feel or receive this in the course of their lives? It is because as time has gone on they have become more and more influenced by the atmosphere of this world. The more progress there is in the world and the more modern it becomes, the more modern a person’s heart and intellect becomes, with the result that their heart and their intellect forget their individuality, forget the prophets and messengers’ advice that the power of God resides within them.

And those who do still remember and believe in the messengers’ advice use their hearts and minds to find the way, analysing this and that, creating methods and systems to enable them to come close to God and God’s power. But in reality that will take them only further away from their own individuality, so the results of their efforts will be images from their heart and thinking. In Islam these are referred to as the realm of majasi or ajsam, which means a world that is an image of reality, not reality itself.

And yet it has already been demonstrated. Although Jesus was no longer living in this world – he had died and returned to heaven – when he showed himself to the people who had known him before, meaning his disciples, he showed them the signs on his hands and elsewhere: the traces of the nails on his hands and his feet. He showed them all that he had experienced in the world in order to indicate that his experience was not a dream but a reality.

It was the same with Prophet Muhammad. When he experienced his ascension, when he stood before God, it was witnessed by people travelling in a caravan – a group of merchants travelling by camel. The merchants riding their camels saw a person riding the Buraq,8 travelling at great speed. They saw him for just the blink of an eye, but one who happened to know Muhammad seemed to recognise him and said, ‘Perhaps that was Muhammad passing.’ And when Prophet Muhammad ascended, he saw and felt everything in a tangible way; it was more real than his life in this world with his physical body.

Brothers and sisters, given these examples, it must be true that for human beings who have been granted God’s grace to live on after they die and go to heaven, their experience in heaven will be more real than their experience in this world. That is how it is. This is just to show you that the right way and the only way to get to know God and the power of God that manifests in a human being – usually described as ‘God accompanying human beings’ – is for a person truly to have faith in God and to be patient, accepting and willing to let go. Just that. That is the only way, the only means, by which a human being can receive a contact with God’s greatness.

Cilandak, Indonesia - January 22, 1967
Code Number : 67 TJK 1
‘Why does Bapak have to do things like buying land? They say he is a guide on the spiritual path, so why is he still involved with material things, and even building such a beautiful house? That is not being a spiritual teacher.’

Yes, indeed, Bapak is not a spiritual teacher. Yes, he is Haryono’s father and Tuti’s grandfather. He is doing these things to demonstrate that even though God gives a person awareness so that they can understand their life [in the hereafter], they still need to make their life in this world easier. Because in this world there are no spiritual dishes: there is no spiritual rice; there is no spiritual curry; no spiritual gudeg or spiritual sugar. If you wish to eat spiritual gudeg, you will never get to eat. For food needs to be tangible, it needs to be utilised by this physical body of ours. So, the physical belongs with the physical and the spiritual belongs with the spiritual. Bapak is trying to remind you of this, lest, having received the latihan, you no longer want to work. The soul and spiritual food are non-material and have no form. So your mouth … and the spiritual food … [Bapak demonstrates, inaudible].

In fact, once we have received the latihan we can learn things from our own self. For example, ‘Mouth, what are you good for?’

‘To eat.’

‘If your purpose is to eat, then you must know what it is that you want to eat.’

‘Yes, it is this.’

‘Where does that come from, and how can one get it?’

Your mouth will know this.

That is how it is. There are people who are good at reading signs. When they get a twitch here [gesture] it means that they are going to eat something delicious. [Laughter.] And then they do. If they get a twitch here [gesture], it means they are going to have a fight. [Laughter.]

‘Why are you going to fight?’

‘Because I’ve got a twitch.’

So they can read the signs, but they do not understand their real content. That is what you need to be able to do. For those of us who are Muslims, we are trained in this every morning, noon, afternoon, sunset and evening: ‘Allah! Usalli fardha’s-subh ...’19 [Bapak demonstrates.] Whoa, it seems as if there is something … [inaudible]. That is what you call being perceptive. It means that you become aware of the situation you will be facing.

So we are trained to become human beings – if we can – who know the beginning and the end, the origin and the conclusion of everything we experience and face. For everything has an origin. That being so, it makes me scratch my head when a Subud member asks, ‘What kind of work is right for me?’

‘What kind of Subud is that?’ Truly. But if you ask, Bapak will not stop you. It just means you are not there yet. But go on doing your latihan. Be diligent in doing the latihan. The latihan is everything.

If you are working at something and it turns out wrong, don’t stop. If you do something and it goes wrong, try to find the reason why. Then you will not be facing a dead end. Your path is always open. If, for example, you start a business buying and selling whatever it is – it could be goats, or whatever – and you lose money, then you change to something else, that will be worse. It will be difficult. You change and you will fall again; you change and fall again. You are always starting anew.

Toyko, Japan - July 24, 1967
Code Number : 67 TYO 1
Yes, you yourselves have already been able to feel evidence of it when you do the Latihan. Your self is awakened, beginning with the legs and hands; and then movements, energy and gestures arise in your whole body. Subsequently, your self is guided by God so that in your ordinary life in the world you become acquainted with the Power of God. Like Bapak, for instance: when Bapak drinks something, he is aware of God and His Power. Bapak drinks this ( gestures ) because of God, because of the Will of God. Why is Bapak able to receive this ? The reason is that it has all been willed by God. It is willed by God that Bapak is no longer filled with any self-interest, nor has he any personal interest in anything he does. On the contrary, if at this very moment, while speaking, it is God's Will for Bapak to die, Bapak is prepared for it. Bapak is fully and sincerely prepared even to die and also to be deprived of his material possessions. So if, for example, you are still weighed down in your life by material possessions, how will you be able to follow the Will of Almighty God that manifests in your inner self?

You will be able to receive signs that verify whether all your actions and behavior pass through a pure channel, pass through a clean channel, when you move and when you are still, in that you will feel pleasant, happy, nice and calm in your inner feeling, whatever you do, when sitting, sleeping, eating, walking, seeing and so forth. Thus, clearly, brothers and sisters, the true way that is in accordance with the Will of Almighty God is always through a channel that feels nice and pleasant. Not only does eating beefsteak feel nice, but so does sitting down. These are the signs, brothers and sisters, that enable you to feel the difference between receiving through a pure channel and through an impure channel. If it is through an impure channel, you will not be able to feel nice or pleasant even when eating tasty food, let alone when sitting, because your inner feeling still contains a lot of nafsu.

Therefore, when the condition of your inner feeling has been cleansed from the influence of passion and lower forces, your self will become good and pleasant. Thus the state of your self will no longer be blocked by the influence of the material forces.

Cilandak, Indonesia - November 27, 1971
Code Number : 71 TJK 23
( Testing: about Mary, mother of Jesus )
M.'s receiving in the testing shows only the outer form or outer cover, the skin of the inner content. M. does not yet receive and understand the feeling of Mary, and how her inner nature is.

Bapak has just spoken about that. One cannot come to know the inner, the feeling, without receiving the Qodar of God. Thus what we experience in the latihan kejiwaan just touches the outside, the skin. It does not yet reach the content. The content is what we need, and the content is the Qodar of Almighty God.

So as time goes on, brothers and sisters, you will increasingly know and be able to receive the content of everything you have felt and have wished for. And gradually you will get farther, beyond the perception of the heart and mind. As Bapak has just said, you will be able to receive and really feel your state before you existed on earth and your state after you have ceased to be here. This is most important for you.

Plainly, brothers and sisters, you are still a long way from this in your latihan kejiwaan; and you need to go on doing the latihan, because its content, the Qodar, is from God.

So besides doing your latihan faithfully you need also to fast. Don't feel you have reached your limits if you have been able to move and see this or that in the latihan. Not yet, not yet. No signs yet that you can correct yourselves. First, have you met anyone who hated you but who later, when he got to know you, lost his hate and even became your friend? Second, when you speak and give advice, is it always your experience that the hearer accepts this and feels content with it?

These signs would prove that your love of others, received from God's Qodar, is not limited but opens out wide, so that, though you lead an ordinary life like others, you will be loved by everyone you meet and everyone you associate with.

Thus through the Qodar of God you really become somebody valued and appreciated in the eyes of society, and fit to be loved by your fellow men.

So, brothers and sisters, people who can receive the Grace of God and be near to the Power of God are people truly chosen, people truly inspired by God. It was so with prophets and saints. Anybody who met a prophet felt love for him. Yet, from the outer aspect, what did people get from the prophets? Nothing, because most of the prophets possessed nothing.

Cilandak, Indonesia - February 3, 1974
Code Number : 74 CDK 2
The weather and the climate seem to be different nowadays from what they used to be. That is evident when what ought to be dry seasons become rainy seasons. One could almost say that for the past two years there has been a double rainy season running on. So the weather is not very good these days and a lot of people are ill. It is as if the air were thin, like in Mexico. At the moment it is almost like the air in Mexico.

Cilandak, Indonesia - April 14, 1974
Code Number : 74 CDK 9
The weather and the climate seem to be different nowadays from what they used to be. That is evident when what ought to be dry seasons become rainy seasons. One could almost say that for the past two years there has been a double rainy season running on. So the weather is not very good these days and a lot of people are ill. It is as if the air were thin, like in Mexico. At the moment it is almost like the air in Mexico.

Many people are saying those are signs and symptoms of the comet ( Kohoutek comet ); the star with a tail streaming out behind it. There were indications beforehand that the world was going to have some bad experiences, and people were foretelling it.

It really is like that, for there are a great many people in the world at present, and the heat of the atmosphere is caused not only by the sun but also by people.

The news from abroad tells of something like a state of war existing at the present time. There is also excessive cold and no means of heating in England and these other countries. People who need to work five days a week are working three days a week, and this may even be reduced to two days. If the working week is cut down to only two days, trade will also fall off and the profits from the work will also be less. That is why prices go up.

That is the will of man. It can be said that it is people who make the world good and it is also people who make it bad. Taking it on a small scale on the scale of your own selves, it is your own selves that can make you happy and it is also your own selves that can do you harm. So you must not blame it on God. No. God remains the same forever. It is people who make all the trouble.

Wolfsburg, Germany - June 17, 1975
Code Number : 75 WOB 8
Brothers and sisters, you are, of course, already aware that the Spiritual Brotherhood of Subud is an association of people who have received ilham ( divine inspiration or blessing ), or what in Islam is called the qodar, from the One Almighty God. In our Subud Brotherhood our first and foremost concern should therefore be the kejiwaan. We must not let our Subud Brotherhood continue for ever as if it made a division between material and spiritual. Because Bapak has suggested the creation of enterprises, it is as if you have gone a little too far from the kejiwaan, and signs of this are that the kejiwaan is hardly playing the leading part. That is why the plan which Bapak is putting forward will provide many possibilities for the kejiwaan to play its true role.

Toronto, Canada - May 12, 1976
Code Number : 76 YYZ 1
It has frequently happened in our experience that somebody who has been opened, and after only doing the latihan for six months, because of their own nature and the grace of God Almighty, after being opened and then doing the latihan diligently for let's say six months, they have really received the latihan and been able to receive the content of the latihan, and show the results of it by, for example, by being able to understand things before they have happened, or being able to feel and to know the content of the hearts of their brothers and sisters before these contents were openly declared. In other words, they have shown signs which have the result that those around them acknowledge, in other words, the brothers and sisters in their group acknowledge that these are people who have truly been given the grace of God Almighty. And this hasn't happened only once, this has happened many times, and Bapak has experienced this many, many times.

So there is no easy way to predict what a person's development is in the kejiwaan, because it is entirely something individual and it cannot be measured in time or in any other way. It is something that is only known to God and is known to that person himself. So what is important is that even such a person who has shown signs of having received very quickly and early on in Subud, you should not then imagine that he has arrived or that he has reached the end of the journey, or whatever has to be achieved in the latihan kejiwaan. Because the scope of the latihan kejiwaan is not that you just have to reach five or ten things, or have to take five steps or ten steps. It is like, comparing it to the people in the world, there are not ten or five people in the world, there are millions of people in the world, or as scientists say, there is not only one sun, there are millions of suns in the universe. So such is also the scope of the latihan kejiwaan. So we should never imagine that we have reached the end or reached the boundary of what we can receive, because there is always very, very far to go.

So it is clear that what concerns the achievement in the kejiwaan is not something that can be known by anyone else except ourselves and God. So it is important simply just to feel it for ourselves what is the result of what we have achieved in the kejiwaan. It is enough just to feel it and to go on with our latihan. And it's not necessary to have any kind of hierarchy or have any other kind of opinion about someone who is higher than another, or someone who is more advanced than another, because this will always simply lead to bad feelings in the Subud groups and all sorts of unpleasant happenings. So that the feeling which is really right and which contributes the most to the harmony in Subud is if we feel that we are just the same as everybody else. And it is that feeling which can enable us to live in harmony and work in harmony with our brothers and sisters in Subud.

Cilandak, Indonesia - October 13, 1976
Code Number: 76 CDK 16
There are all these things, brothers and sisters, so this is like the tales about Sawito or whoever it was. He begins by going to live in solitude and what he is after is to be king. “I shall be a just king”. That is how he pictures himself. He is thinking in the wrong way, for what is called a just king does not exist. There are no just kings or rulers; only the Lord God is just. A human being cannot be just. The longer one tastes sugar, the sweeter it is. Yes; and the more pleasant things are, the more he wants them for himself, and he does not become a just ruler. He cannot be just. How can he act justly when he cannot be just where his own self is concerned?

So clearly the latihan kejiwaan is like an indicator for you; it really is an indicator for you. You think about it in advance, make a forecast. Bapak has been able to give you an example. Bapak never thinks about it, but there are all these pictures. Bapak can tell you frankly that he can find any and everything in the kejiwaan, even how to dance. It is very funny. If Bapak is asked "Do you want to be King of Solo?" he says "No." "Well, that is strange, not wanting to be King of Solo. You would enjoy being King of Solo." "Yes, so far as enjoying it is concerned, of course it would be nice, but how could I be King of Solo? How could I, when I am not the King's son, not even the King's nephew? So if I went to Solo and settled myself comfortably on the King's throne, I should certainly be arrested at once. I should certainly be put in handcuffs."

So that is not appropriate, brothers and sisters. The things that Bapak does are things that are appropriate; yes, just if they are normal things to do. The signs that it is appropriate are that when you think about it you think that you can do it, you can carry it out. That is why you should look in the latihan to see what kind of maps you can find. You cannot measure how long it will take to complete what the map shows, brothers and sisters. People ask Bapak how many weeks something is going to take. "Oh, this is not to be measured in weeks but in windon ( a cycle of eight years )". It could take eight years; it could take sixteen years, it could take twenty-four years, it could take forty years. It could also take longer; it could take so long that you cannot do it before you die. Thus it is heavy; it is difficult, is it not?"

That is why, besides waiting for something like that, or waiting for the right time to come when the thing can be done, you should meanwhile get on with some sort of enterprise. The kind of enterprise that Bapak means, brothers and sisters, is working together with perhaps ten, twenty or thirty other people. If in the latihan we are all together, so that we can also be together in work, worshipping God, it means that there is one God for all of us, and so why should we not be able to work together with our friends and with other people in doing external work; that is, in an enterprise? We are trained to be in harmony with other people in our outer lives, brothers and sisters, how much less can we do it when we already have money?

Malang, Indonesia - November 20, 1976
Code Number: 76 MLE 1
That is why in religion it is only God Who gives help, so that people say, as Bapak said just now, Ashadu anla ilaha ilallah, wa ashadu anna Muhammadar rasulullah". That means that only God is to be worshipped and there is none but the One Almighty God who can right all wrongs and create something that does not yet exist. And to this the prophet Muhammad, the messenger of God, bears witness, as a symbol standing for your own self. Thus it is your own inner self that is of the nature of Muhammad, because this is the nature of the asma, the work, of the One Almighty God and of the power of God.

It is like an illustration, which is a sign or symbol, not as if it were itself the thing illustrated, but just a symbol. Like a governor, what people call the governor is not in fact the person holding the office, but the office itself. As for the person concerned, he is an ordinary man. Because of that, as a standard, in order not to be misleading, a governor needs to be given a sign, so that he will not be mistaken for someone holding another office. These signs or seals are of many kinds. What is the governor's seal like? Perhaps he uses stars, so that when they see this seal the people can be sure that he is the authorized ruler of the district.

Woodstock, VT USA - September 12, 1977
Code Number : 77 WOS 1
So the Latihan Kejiwaan of Subud aims in the direction of the prophets, not in the direction of shadows. Well, even now some people speak of shadow governments and real governments. Yes, they say that. Thus we must not do things designed to produce only the shadow of reality, but we must choose reality.

Bapak has experienced this, and it was also experienced by the prophet Muhammad and by Christ. When Christ himself returned to heaven, he came back again to this world after seven days, or forty days. His disciples, his followers, were holding a meeting at that time, and he came to them. Everyone was taken aback, for how could Christ come back again after he had died? 'Oh, yes, you see me, and you are amazed, but I am really here. Of course you know that I died, and of course you witnessed my death and saw me crucified. And I have died, which means that I am no longer in this world. But I am sent by the will of the One Almighty God to bear witness to the truths that I have told you. And it is the truth that I was really crucified, I am dead, and the One Almighty God has taken me back to live in heaven again. This is the sign.' Bapak has also had signs, but it is not necessary to tell you about them.

Well, that is how it was, brothers and sisters. Christ died; it is true that he really did die, but he did not die embittered. No; he did die, but his consciousness remained intact and whole. It was like that.

This is beginning to happen from the Latihan Kejiwaan, brothers and sisters. When you are receiving your Latihan Kejiwaan, you do like this and like this, and then you go 'Hey, hey.' Then you laugh, you shout, you weep, you scream and shout, but you cannot help doing it or prevent yourself doing it. You just start crying, and do not know why.

It is thus clear, brothers and sisters, that the Latihan Kejiwaan which you receive and practice proves to you that your jiwa is alive. You are brought to life, out of the state in which it is as if you are locked up in a house filled with pressures from the lower forces. If you feel that, brothers and sisters, then that is surely enough. You should be very happy to be able to receive such a gift and such help from God. So you will really feel regret later on if you do not persevere in practicing the latihan, You will regret it later on, when you are in a situation in which you no longer have any power and it is as if, even though there is food in front of you, you cannot eat. You will be lost there. Yes, and then, of course, God and His power will require you to repeat everything you have done and to do it all over again.

San Francisco, CA USA - December 6, 1977
Code Number : 77 SFO 4
Bapak received another book, not like an atlas, but like a dictionary, very thick; a book thick like this. I opened it and looked inside, and I saw that it had nothing in it. It contained only blank sheets of paper. Then Bapak asked in his heart what was the meaning of this? Then at once some writing appeared in the book, without any intention for this to be written. It said:

'The answers to all your questions will be written here as soon as you ask them.'

That meant there would only be writing there if Bapak asked questions. Well, this was a good opportunity, because of course Bapak could ask a lot of questions, like you do. You ask all sorts of things. So then Bapak asked all sorts of things, about future events, for instance, and there were all the answers, all written down. Amongst other answers it was said that Bapak must believe that in the near future a world war would break out. At that time there were no signs of this. It was still 1930, and the war between Ethiopia and Italy did not start until later than that. The book said that later on there would be a great war, and that after that great war Indonesia would become independent, and that after that independence Bapak would be willed by God to travel round the world. And Bapak's questions about the first book were also answered. The answer was:

'That was an indication that later on you will meet people from all over the world; people with brown skins, white skins, yellow skins, red skins and black skins. They will be everywhere. You will go round the world and all the peoples of the world will love you and honor you. You will not become a rich man, nor will you hold high rank, but you will be honored and loved by people all over the world, who will look upon you as their father.'

That was the answer.

This really did happen, brothers and sisters. Then the world war broke out, and when in fact there really was a world war, Bapak understood. Of course the war would end, and its ending would be a fortunate one for Indonesia. It was true; Indonesia was to become independent. And then, as to what the book said about Bapak going round the world, Bapak would have to wait and see whether or not that was true. But it was true, so that eventually Bapak really did travel round the world.

Cilandak, Indonesia - May 7, 1978
Code Number : 78 CDK 6
( Testing )

Yes; change places. Finish. Now the women again; the helpers from Jakarta. But not just in front; at the back as well. The helpers from Australia and Ceylon can come too. Yes, relax. As Bapak always says, to relax is to be quiet and conscious. Do not begin yet. Be really relaxed and quiet; before you move you should feel whether the signs of life are present in your selves. Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah. Come back again. It is not yet tine to move; it is not yet there, not yet working. Do not start yet, but first feel what is in you. Yes, yes, yes; come back. This starts off all of a sudden and in that way you do not know its origin., That is why, when you die, you will die suddenly. Now watch me, just watch. ( Bapak demonstrates ). This is the sign of life. In Islam, people say “Hu, hu,hu, hu, Allah, Allah, Allah” When this spreads out through the self, at the same time the hands move like this, if it is in Islam, so that you can feel whether the signs of life are present. or not. Watch again. For Christians ( Bapak demonstrates with the sign of the cross ). In Islam one says laa ilaha ilallah ( five time repeated ). Like that. Those are the signs. So what is necessary now? What needs to come alive? Watch. Bapak is not thinking about anything; still not thinking, and then, in Islam . That means that the One Almighty God is the beginning of everything; of whatever you write or sew or anything else. Thus the prayers which people say when they are worshipping God show how people act and behave while they are living in this world. Thus if one knows how it begins, eventually one’s latihan can be said to build up in the right way. The English, the English race or nation, develops like this The Germans like this. In the case of Ceylon, like this, meditation, putting oneself apart from the world. In Java, this is Javanese.

Now follow. Relax and receive the first signs of life. Follow.

( Testing )

Yes; enough. Bapak asks you, how was your inner feeling? You felt happy, light, peaceful, what the Dutch call zaligheid. It is a sublime feeling, a blissful feeling. Thus people who worship God are not allowed to be coerced, brothers and sisters. You are not allowed to make heavy weather of things. That is all. Thank you.

Cilandak, Indonesia - July 2, 1978
Code Number : 78 CDK 14
The vegetable and animal life-forces are already something striking enough. To those there are added the jasmaniah or ordinary human life force. Someone who refrains from sex is not quite a man, but sex can got you into a lot of trouble. How can one have a child and not have trouble? People say that if you are looking for a tests of hell, you can find it by having a child, and indeed this is true. Yea, when the child is grown up, like Harjono, that is all right; he is now a grown man with children of his own. But when he was small he made hell for Bapak. When he saw something he wanted, he would cay “Please daddy, buy me one.” How could I? He knew of a bicycle for sale “Oh daddy, it is a beauty.” He did not understand that his father did not have any money. Thus the greatest of all temptations for a man is a wife. For a woman, it is her husband. That is the ultimate temptation, if you can overcome that, by means of those four linked qualities ( surrender, patience, trustful acceptance and sincere submission ) than you get into the finals. You become one of the finalists, and if you do well, you become a champion. Well, that is how it is if we put it into footballing terms. Thus there are the material, vegetable and animal rounds, and the last round is the jasmaniah. That is like the match between Holland and Argentina ( the finalists the 1970 Gold Cup ). The winners are the world champions. They celebrated the win for a whole week in Argentina, so that the traffic could not move in the streets because of the rejoicing.

What we are talking about is also like that. What are the signs of this? There are signs; that is, what are called wahyu and Anugraha. An earthquake is evidence that the earth shakes. Thus of course everything has its logic, brothers and sisters. There are signs that it exists. Thus when a human being is raised to a level higher than the jasmaniah, there are signs of it, brothers and sisters. You have to look outside to see if there is any wind. There is not. The earth bears witness, the sky bears witness, the sunlight bears witness, everything bears witness to that. That shows that those human beings are on a high level. This is how it is, brothers and sisters; Bapak is not forcing you to reach a higher level. If you can do so, Alhamdulillah. Bapak prays that you will. But you have to begin with patience, trustful acceptance, and sincere submission.

Cilandak, Indonesia - October 7, 1978
Code Number : 78 CDK 21
Bapak understands that all of you, especially the helpers, always hope to be tested, because you say that in the past it has only just been latihan. Now Bapak will do some testing, but Bapak hopes that you really can receive, that you don't just want to be tested but not understand.

Relax. How is your state before receiving and practicing the latihan kejiwaan? What are the signs?

Relax. How is your state before receiving and practicing the latihan kejiwaan? What are the signs?

Yes; but these are the signs of latihan, the signs of life. Those of you who come from Europe have not all heard it, but those of you who come from this country have of course, heard how it is in the wayang - how, before the wayang begins, the dalang ( puppet master ) first knocks: tock, tock, tock, tock, tock. This is what Muslims usually do before the prayers - tong, tong, tong, tong ( sound of the drum at the mosque ). That is the beginning. It is the beginning of the state of receiving one's content, the sifat receiving the zat. The sifat or nature is your own self, and to receive the zat or power is to receive the content of your life. After the content of its life is present in the sifat, then what happens and what it will show is the asma. Asma means its uses, its work. Well, this is the latihan.

Thus, before you do any work, you first indicate what the work is. That is why, when you receive, you cannot understand what you have received, because you start to work before indicating what the work is. You do not understand what is the meaning of that work or what you are working for. That is the reason for what the Muslims call the niat or usoIii ( making an intention ). Thus when one says, 'UsoIii fardol duhur' it means that one intends to do the work for the time of lohor ( the midday prayer ).

Singapore - September 28, 1979
Code Number : 79 SIN 1
It is clear, brothers and sisters, that what we receive in the latihan, and also what we receive otherwise, has indicated to us that it is only God in Whom we should believe, and that you should make the whole of your self into amal. That means that you should make it work in accordance with its uses, its right and proper uses. Is it necessary to use your hands to hit people? No. Your hands are for making things, for reaching out for things that are useful to you. What are your legs for? They are for walking, not for trampling on people or kicking them. Eyes are for seeing; of course they are for looking to see what things are right and useful, not for looking for things that will damage your life. That is how it is, brothers and sisters, and this applies right up to the mind. You should use your mind for the highest purposes. Of course that is what God wills. Avoid everything that offends against what is right, and go towards the way that is best for your life in your worship of the One Almighty God. This is what is called amal ma'ruf nahi mungkar ( the perfect amal which avoids all evil deeds. ) Because Bapak is a Muslim, he uses the Islamic terminology.

Thus when Bapak received Subud, he really understood. While Bapak was asleep, he was awakened. Bapak got up and walked. Because at that time Bapak was still a young man and was studying to become an office manager, he was accustomed to study. When Bapak was awakened from his sleep and began to walk, he walked into the room which he always used as a study. When he got there he did not begin studying, but he just stood there. Suddenly his hands were raised up. Bapak understood that this meant takbiratul ikrom ( the start of the Islamic prayers ). Bapak understood, but still it was strange. Bapak had no intention of doing that. Then he did the rukuk, iftidal, sujud, attahiyah awal ( the various movements and prostrations of the Islamic prayers ). He did those twice over; then the attihiyat akhir ( the final stage of the prayers ). After that he went back to bed and went to sleep again. That was the first occasion. On the second night, the third night and thenceforward, it kept changing. Eventually it came to the end, and Bapak stood up, and out came the words Allahu Akbar. 'Oh, this is the meaning of the Islamic prayers. Oh yes, yes, yes, yes.'

That agreed with what Bapak's teachers had said, brothers and sisters. Bapak had been to more than one teacher, possibly to as many as nine or ten, but they had all said the same thing: 'Do not go to teachers. You do not need other human beings to teach you.'

'Who then will teach me, Pak?' I said to my guru.

'To you I can and do say that God will be your teacher. There are signs which indicate this', he said.

Bapak did not understand. Bapak is not making any claims, brothers and sisters, but he was born on the same day at the same time of day as the prophet Muhammad, on whom be peace; just as dawn was breaking. It was in the month of Maulud in the year Dal. It was at just the same time as the prophet, for as Bapak was born the cannon fired forty times. When Bapak was born he was given the name Sukarno. But with the name Sukarno, Bapak was ill for three months, and he nearly died. Then there came a stranger, a man whom Bapak's parents did not know, and he spoke to them about this. My parents did not know who he was, nor did they know what he really was. He asked:

'Why was this child given the name Sukarno? Was he not born at dawn?'

'Yes.'

'Then give him the name Muhammad Subhi.' ( sic ) So I was given that name by an unknown man, brothers and sisters. Well, that was my mother's story. As for me, I know nothing of it, for I was a baby. It just happened by chance, brothers and sisters; I make no claim that I was born like the prophet Muhammad. No, it was by chance, and I do not know why. Bapak himself does not understand this, but whereas human beings do not understand, God understands. Thus it is clear that Bapak's knowledge comes from a teacher and this teacher is the content of the latihan kejiwaan of Subud.

Sao Paulo, Brazil - June 1, 1981
Code Number : 81 SAO 4

Cilandak, Indonesia - June 22, 1982
Code Number : 82 CDK 3
( Testing )

Enough. Now Bapak would like the rest of you to sit down and only three of you - Fernando, Hermes and Luciano - to remain standing here. And now, brothers, Bapak will ask each of you concerning your willingness.

Fernando,please show your willingness to become Kejiwaan Coordinator for Southern Latin America. Show what signs are in you.

( Testing )

Now change to Hermes. Hermes, please show what signs are in you of your willingness to become Kejiwaan Coordinator for Southern Latin America.

Cilandak, Indonesia - July 3, 1982
Code Number : 82 CDK 4
Brothers and sisters, if you are to understand the operation of the latihan kejiwaan Subud, you must be able to distinguish clearly between what is, and what is not, from the latihan. You must be able to recognize the difference between what comes through it and what responds to thoughts and desires ( which, as Bapak has explained, cause you to enjoy such functions as eating and working ).

These incline you towards all the various actions which form a part of everyday human life. They must be distinguished from such movements as Bapak has qualified as not being motivated by the desires or instincts but which have their origins rather in signs of Divine Power. The latter come to you so that you should at least partially respond in your actions to the Divine Will.

You will only fully achieve this once everything has been corrected, when your entire being is completely and truly alive - not merely alive at the instinctive level but also at that of Spirit. Such states are known in the Javanese language as rorone ngatunggal ( two in one ). Two distinct parts blend as in the union of sugar and its sweetness, which are indissolubly linked. Sugar leads you to the sweetness and vice versa - though two, they are intertwined as one.

Brothers and sisters, this should in no sense be taken to mean that once you have achieved this fusion, this rorone ngatunggal, then you are at the end of the path. The position may be compared with the various forms or grades in schools, from I to VI, - or with the ascending stages from the kindergarten to the university, where the principle of rorone ngatunggal blends constantly at all levels. There are degrees of Being and it should not be imagined that once this inner union has been achieved, there's no more beyond. That is by no means so! It's as if you were to assume that once you have been accustomed to the latihan kejiwaan, you're at the end of the journey. Quite the contrary, since there are successive gradations to be experienced. Bapak will comment on these so you may begin to get a picture of the situation.

Cilandak, Indonesia - October 3, 1982
Code Number : 82 CDK 14
Brothers and sisters, there are signs written in the palm of the human hand, which it is not possible to create since it is present from the moment of birth. It looks just like the letter F. this brother has interpreted it in the usual human way, saying that people have to die and there's no escape from death. If one has to die, then why fear death? In fact, fearing things generally tends to attract them towards you. If you fear misfortune, you'll get it; similarly you're more likely to fall ill if you are afraid of sickness. Well, Bapak isn't an example, he knows too that people have to die. So if he falls ill, when he goes to bed, he just says "Ya Allah, ya Rabbi" ( My God, My Lord ) and submits. If I die in my sleep now, alhamdulillah ( Praise be to God ).

Bapak surrenders everything to God and in fact as a result goes on living rather than dying. Bapak is now 82, which is considered as rather old, so what does he think about death, does he wish to die? No! People have to die so there's no point in being afraid or having regrets. What is important, brothers and sisters, is that people should not be engrossed in evil acts prior to death, one ought not to neglect the performance of duties that are truly the Will of God.

So work on yourself, on all your senses, so that you may be able fully to provide for your needs in this world ( where you need your physical senses to live ), as you must have enough for your requirements here; but you won't need those particular senses after death.

Once you are dead there are other considerations, different problems to be faced, this physical body wouldn't do for them. Let us consider dreams. People say that if you dream of being eaten or mauled by a tiger, it means for a working person that they will be promoted in rank. For traders and businessmen, it can mean much profit and good fortune.

Despite the fact that you may have heard this, if you fall asleep and do dream that you meet a tiger, you're half scared to death, despite the fact you may remember the saying that being eaten by a tiger in a dream is a symbol of good luck to come. In fact, the meaning of dreams is sometimes the opposite of what it seems to be. Not only sometimes, either! If you dream of being beaten up, you're more likely to receive great good fortune. Does this mean you'll look forward to being beaten up? Not at all! Things are different in dreams.

We see then, brothers and sisters, that although dreams are symbolic of facts, they cannot be fully relied on, as the reverse often happens. Even in the case of your dreams, the mind is of little use. How much the more so when it comes to death! This isn't a human problem, it doesn't relate to human life here. Leave it to God!

Nevertheless, brothers and sisters, God has given us the opportunity, God has given us something which we may use for guidance in our lives. Perhaps if we can't actually put it to use, we can experience it independently of our thoughts, in our hearts. Through Divine Guidance, you may have an experience, but it won't be like a dream, not at all!

Jakarta, Indonesia - December 15, 1982
Code Number : 82 JKT 5
So we can make a hotel costing a hundred million U.S. dollars. Imagine! If you stack it up here, this room will be full. And if you had a hundred million dollars you certainly wouldn't be able to sleep ( laughter ). One million dollars is six hundred and fifty million rupiahs. ( Bapak stumbles over the words ). Nowadays if I talk about material things I get muddled up ( laughter ). Then how is it that I am still able to herd the material? That's the point.

Now it is the weak who will triumph. That's right. Bapak doesn't know when this world will be controlled by those who are weak. The rich are already butting their heads together today - and when the elephants fight it is the sheep who enjoy beefsteak.

Is it true? The signs are there, brothers and sisters. Therefore you must truly feel the closeness of God. You must make the words 'Allahu akbar" efficacious. Don't use them at random, just repeating 'Allahu akbar' all the time. In the end they will have no power.

If you say Allah, Allah at every opportunity, in the end it has no force. In the end where will the force be? In the end it will be elsewhere, and you will end up saying 'Just remember Pak Subuh and then you will get money.' Don't have that attitude: Pak Subuh is a human being. Remember God. Otherwise you are getting something on another person's credit. Bapak isn't training you to be dependent on somebody else: don't let that word enter your vocabulary. You yourself must make progress.

This signs are all there, brothers and sisters. Kalimantan is known to be a place of devils, but when the name of Pak Subuh is mentioned they all run away. It is funny, really. While, in fact, Bapak doesn't hate devils, not at all. They run away because of God. And because Bapak isn't constantly saying 'Allahu akbar'. Bapak just keeps quiet. Allah is great anyway, why keep saying it? If someone keeps saying God's name it means He is still far away. But keeping quiet also isn't just keeping quiet because 'quiet' isn't necessarily the real quiet.

In a few days' time Bapak will go to Surabaya and will also visit the brothers and sisters there, because it seems they have forgotten again - especially the helpers. If they are asked 'In fact, what is Subud, really?' they say 'I myself also still don't know!' That's the helpers! ( laughter )

Anugraha - August 14, 1983
At Seventh World Congress
Code Number : 83 LON 18
Obviously, brothers and sisters, however strong and influential you may become, in the end you have to die. And when you die, brothers and sisters, you cannot take your possessions to the other world. You will return as you first came: naked you were born, and naked you will die.

This is a reminder for man. However powerful he may become, so that he can make airplanes and all sorts of inventions - even in ancient times, the pharaohs thought they were God - in the end he must die. Pharaoh died. Adam himself died. The prophets Abraham, Moses, Jesus and Muhammad, all died.

Brothers and sisters, the story goes that Adam and Eve both understood the meaning of their lives, yet God still gave signs to remind man that God created him and that if God had not created him he could not exist in the world. One of these signs is that, when a woman is with child, the child within her feels as if it is in heaven. Filled and nourished as it is through the flesh and blood of its mother, it does not need to look for anything. Its mother gives it everything, and its father provides their livelihood. The baby only has to eat and drink inside its mother's tummy. This state of bliss is analogous to Adam's state when he was still in heaven.

For, a child who is in its mother's womb, although it has no voice, can hear, smell, see and feel what God and His power are like. So, besides Adam, who is said to have been the first human being, those who know Almighty God are those who are in their mother's wombs. This is why, in the stories of the prophets, it is related that before Jesus was born, he could speak within his mother's womb. He is said to have shown his mother the way, so that she could avoid anyone who disliked her.

Cilandak, Indonesia June 28, 1984
Last Ramadhan Talk
Code Number : 84 CDK 8
There's something else that Bapak still remembers from his youth, a strange sort of thing. Bapak could never say words which were improper or out of place, the sort of words that children like to use, naughty or smutty or not right. It wasn't that Bapak didn't want to say them: he couldn't. Even in class, even in an examination, even if he had to read from a text words such as that - even when ordered by his teacher, Bapak was unable to utter the words, unable to pronounce them, and Bapak would stammer and it just wouldn't come out. Once he actually got hit by his teacher who said, "Surely, you can read! Come on, now, read it!" But Bapak couldn't. At that time, certainly, Bapak would never have imagined that one day he would be able to speak with you as he does now, because Bapak tended to stammer and found it rather hard to speak.

Brothers and sisters, it is clear from these few stories that there were already signs of something that would happen, of something that Bapak would become, even when Bapak was small. And indeed it often happens in this sort of situation, the situation of Bapak's parents and elders, that older people may already be able to see signs - but they don't like to say anything about them.

Bapak's mother saw different things, different signs, but she never liked to say what she thought they meant because, in fact, we are not allowed to anticipate God. It is not right to say things before they happen. Even though you can see something, even though our elders see things, they sometimes do not like to say anything about it before it actually happens.

These stories are simply to indicate the kind of difference that we are speaking about, so that you do not get surprised or depressed or bored if, after having done the latihan for five, maybe ten, maybe twenty years, you have not yet received something that is really genuine, solid and real. This is why you should have patience because you are still very strongly influenced by your mind. Your mind still mixes itself in with your latihan.

Furthermore, there is a second reason why you may not have received anything really real yet. The reason: it is not time yet. Everyone has their time. There are trees which bear fruit in five years. Some, in fifteen years. Others in twenty. The same is true of human beings.

Cilandak, Indonesia - May 29, 1986
Code Number : 86 CDK 2
Brothers and sisters, for those of you who have been following the latihan for a long time, there are certainly signs of progress. You have surely experienced a difference between how you are now and how you used to be. For example, whereas you often used to get angry, now you don't. Or, you would get very worried about things, but now you don't. You used to be very worried if you didn't have any money, but now, although you still may not have any money, you feel at peace. This is a blessing, a real gift of great benefit to man, so his heart is really peaceful. The one obstacle to the peace of your inner feeling is your heart and mind.

Amen. Bapak Muhammad-Subuh Sumohadiwidjojo

---